OFF
I am off, out of focus and completely out of sync this week.
There. That's all there is to be said. My current state is so completely not me that it's freaking me out a little. I hate feeling like this.
Can I chalk this up to depression? February malaise? ennui? Not a fucking clue. I'm not unhappy, just out of focus.
All I know if that I am not myself and hating it. I feel edgy and paranoid. It's one of the worst feelings. So very hard to describe to another person, but there it is.
Not to mention my concentration is completely shot to hell and my mind is giving leave to wander. Bad wander. Wander to things I shouldn't be worrying or thinking about. Things I dealt with already that my current state of unrest feels like dredging up again.
I need to break out of this and get back to myself. I just don't know how to.
There. That's all there is to be said. My current state is so completely not me that it's freaking me out a little. I hate feeling like this.
Can I chalk this up to depression? February malaise? ennui? Not a fucking clue. I'm not unhappy, just out of focus.
All I know if that I am not myself and hating it. I feel edgy and paranoid. It's one of the worst feelings. So very hard to describe to another person, but there it is.
Not to mention my concentration is completely shot to hell and my mind is giving leave to wander. Bad wander. Wander to things I shouldn't be worrying or thinking about. Things I dealt with already that my current state of unrest feels like dredging up again.
I need to break out of this and get back to myself. I just don't know how to.