(no subject)
"Let's pretend, we're just two people and you're not better than me." - Dear Mr. President by Pink.
That's probably the best way to describe life right now. Everywhere I turn someone is trying to tell me I'm making a mistake or that my life is in shambles because I want it to be. Many of the problems in my life have nothing to do with that.
When life becomes rough, you finally realise who your real friends are. I look back on my high school career, and I realise why they are no longer my friends today.
Kim, I'm sorry you feel I'm doing this to hurt you. I'm sorry you feel that I am making a mistake. I have done the best I can in every aspect of my life, and now I have to be strong for not only my sake but also Matt's. You and I ALWAYS said we'd respect the wishes of our significant other in situations of a child. Yes, I can admit this would not be my first choice, but I knew it would come up, and therefore I kept an open mind and discussed ALL options openly with Matt, and just as I want him to respect my decision not to keep the child, I need to respect his to not have someone else raise our child.
I hope in time, that you can forgive me and that in time our friendship may one day grow to be what it once was. I wish you all the best in life, love and happiness. I just know Kade will be the perfect addition to your life and that the three of you will grow together, and be wonderful for each other. I love you.
"Oh Lord, have mercy on my soul. For I have walked a sinful road. So I'm going to get down on my knees. beg forgiveness to help set me free. Lord, have mercy on me please." - Mercy On Me by Christina Aguilera
I have no idea what it is, but everytime I feel like I've fallen so far down I'll never ever be able to get back up, a hole opens in the clouds and light shines down and gives me a little faith for tomorrow. I need to have faith in something. It definitely isn't myself, so why not have faith in someone who can see you through every dark time.
"I was just trying to be myself. You go your way, I'll meet you in hell. All these secrets that I shouldn't tell, I've got to run away. It's hypocritical of you. Do as you say not as you do. Never be your perfect girl. I've got to runaway." -Runaway by Pink
Mom, I hope your happy now. You've finally crossed the line. I'm glad you think I've ruined your life for nineteen years, and I hope every agonizing moment reminds you of the horrible past you put yourself through. I hope his torment and way of driving your children away is worth the five moments of happiness you get from your "so-called" orgasms.
You're a fucking liar, and I hope you finally realise that your children are not ignorant and can see through your bullshit. Have a good one, and I hope you finally learn something.
These are the rants in my brain right now. Have a good night all.
-Mal