VII. Polygaymous.

[maleficentia]

Well, color me a blushing bride, if you can. If anyone else has matrimonial inclinations towards yours truly, I suggest they get the burning secret off their chest as soon as possible, because the boat is leaving for Iceland post-haste (this means you, Georgia). At least, I think Prudence said Iceland. She's the globe-trotter, not I

Comments

[cometospain]

My my. And last fall, I had almost thought myself too old to renew my passport.

[hatesbears]

Wait.

[hatesbears]

Fuck, NO.

[hatesbears]

No one said ANYTHING about bringing on the living dead.

[maleficentia]

I did, actually. Georgia is the new black.

[hatesbears]

Black like her decaying flesh.

[maleficentia]

Black like your adorable little heart.

[hatesbears]

No, no, Asher, you have it so WRONG. This isn't the part where you're supposed to love me for my qualities as a really good person; this is the part where we're supposed to engage in semi-pornographic talk of spanking in order to verify our love!

[maleficentia]

Other recently-engaged couples seem fond of talking of relative adorkability?

[hatesbears]

I'm not drunk enough to engage in acid reflux-worthy portmanteaus.

[maleficentia]

You've reminded me--bring Pepto-bismol.

[cometospain]

You also forget -- black like the buboes I was sporting in the fifteenth century before I managed to kill the plague with my own two hands.

[maleficentia]

Dear Christ; you're a global hero. What if rats board the ship? How can anyone refuse your presence now?

[cometospain]

Next on the list of microbes to vanquish is ebola -- you know, just in case we make a little swing down to the Congo during our Grand Honeymoon Tour of the world at large.

[maleficentia]

The world is our infectious, pustule-ridden oyster, which thee with sword (and nail file?) shall open.

[cometospain]

Truly, vaccinations and antibiotics have nothing on me.