GW fic: Freeport 23 (rewrite)

[maldoror_gw]

A couple of days late! Work is still crazy and then I spend too much of my little free time reading manga.

Link to all chapters

Comments

[sharibet]

Ah, one of my favorite chapters! Wufei's confession about his role in the Preventers' organization and his real reason for being exile to Freeport, and Duo's unexpected outrage on Wufei (and Heero's) behalf for the price they're paying to create a new world. Excellent, excellent stuff.

Now, on to the nit-picks:

Duo was giving Wufei's bare chest an appreciate look

er, I think the word you want here is "appreciative"

"You take away my coffee, man, even Recyc won't want your remains."

Duo Maxwell is a man after my own heart. ::happy sigh::

Wufei, who abhorred lies and dissimilation so strongly

correct spelling: dissimulation

I'll help you kick ass and take names, and keep the band aids handy for afterwards.

Band-Aids (this is a formal product name and a registered trademark, so it should be capped and punctuated as Johnson & Johnson does it. *g* Why, yes, I am technical writer in real life!)

As always, great job!

[maldoror_gw]

THis was the hardest chapter to write (and re-write, this chapter went through the most mutation of the entire fic), because it's complex, emotionally raw, and I'm more comfortable with guys beating each other up ^_^; But considering how crucial it is, I'm glad to see the response it's gotten! Makes the hard work worthwhile.

Thanks for the typo-spotting! A few more put to rest *fixes*

[sharibet]

I guess your hard work is really paying off, because you do complex and emotionally raw so very, very well. I re-read The Arrangement a couple of months ago, and it's still a favorite of mine because of the emotional complexity.

However, as a writer myself, the jealous part of me has to admit that she's a little relieved to hear that you have to work hard at it. ::wry grin:: It would have been unbearable to realize that these scenes just flowed from your fingertips with ease...

[maldoror_gw]

To paraphrase something I read somewhere, anyone who says writing is easy is a liar ^^; The trick is to MAKE it look easy so the reader gets lost in the story instead of tripping up over the writing. That demands even more work, paradoxically. Remind me why I love this hobby...?

[alita_b_angel]

It had lurked in the back of my head, but since I'm one of those readers that have to, MUST erase what happened to the rest of the story even on reread, so that it's a surprise once I get to it... Wufei's justification, his reason for being sent to Freeport hits like a punch

[maldoror_gw]

I'm certainly glad it's got punch ^__^ It's a turning point to the fic, and the hardest chapter to write (re-write) period :P It was hard to get the tone right, to make it clear what Wufei was doing to himself without making him sound whiny. Glad it worked ^_^

Alas, I don't think I could write any more canon GW to save my life! You'll have to imagine that Heero eventually finds his own Freeport...

[anyjen]

I really shouldn’t be re-reading such a key chapter before re-reading the rest (yes, I broke and went to read the old version of this story a while back), but I couldn’t help it. It's one of my favourite chapter in all... I’ll tell you my in-depth opinion of it when I’m re-reading the whole story properly -since I’m able to follow the plot better that way- but for now I though I could point out a couple of typos.

when he had them in his grip for the legal twenty four hours and their realized their petty little threats

“and they realized”

He's full of ideals, without necessarily the vision or wisdom to go with it.

I may be wrong, but I think that should be “with them”.

[maldoror_gw]

This chapter is certainly key, which made it difficult to write! I"m glad it's gotten such a good response ^_^ Thanks for the typo spotting *fixes*

[anyjen]

when he had them in his grip for the legal twenty four hours and their realized their petty little threats

Oh, and it really should be "twenty-four hours", there. Otherwise you are just listing the numbers 20 and 4.

[maldoror_gw]

Guh, I always get tha twrong. Thanks!

[bonzaineko]

Ah, my favorite part of the story! The pr0n was hot of course, but this, I think, is the real climax of their relationship. In a special, "by the way, here's a punch to your gut" kind of way. :) Very happy to see this updated, as it brightens my otherwise blizzard-filled day!

[maldoror_gw]

Oh, it's definitely the climax (well, Wufei's half); sex is just the icing on the cake, this is where the real bond starts. Glad you liked it ^_^

[maldoror_gw]

OH, and keep warm! Those blizzards bite...