ARGH x 1,000,000,000

[malakijr]

Does anyone else get mad about things that happened a long time ago and you KNOW you should let them go and you KNOW you shouldn't be mad about them but they spring into your mind from time to time and you're fucking FURIOUS when they do? Don't tell me "let go and let god when you forgive you set a prisoner free and you find out the prisoner is

Comments

[dr_christine]

You're definitely not alone. I actually had to start keeping a private LJ for all my angry thoughts over petty things that shouldn't even be on my mind anymore. God, does it feel good to get it all out without worrying about people reading it and thinking that I'm insane.

I guess this counts as giving advice, so sorry for that, but there's always the other awesome way to get out rage -- watching super violent movies. American Psycho is a good one for, "why am I having all of these violent thoughts, does this make me insane?"

[malakijr]

I end up wanting people to read things after I write them though. It's a compulsion. And then I post thoughts and people get pissy with me and I end up screaming at them and the vicious cycle continues. DAMN YOU BRAIN SHUT UP AND LEAVE ME ALONE.

I thought about you today. I was perusing http://www.watch-movies.net (best site ever for watching full movies for free without having to worry about getting fined or any shit since it's totally legal since you're not downloading anything and the movies are hosted offsite so even they can't be shut down or fined for providing the movies...sticking it to the FCC FTW) and they had "Blood Beach" which I've always wanted to see, but they only have the 5 minute preview, not the whole movie. Suck. Have you seen it? Is it as sleazy and fun as it looks?

[dr_christine]

Yeah, I hear that. It's actually funny you say that. My mentioning of my ranting journal made me remember that I hadn't ranted in a while so I went and wrote out this huge thing and ended it with how my anger issues wouldn't be the death of me, however, my want to tell people about my anger issues probably would. Like, I go to a psychologist once a week and complain about really petty stuff that I can always complain about but I've learned to live with, but the issues that I'd actually like to have assessed, I don't want to tell her because... well, you know, you just don't really tell your psychologist (or anyone else a lot of the time!) about all the weird, crazy and violent shit that goes through your head, right? Or else, who knows where you'll end up.

YES! Blood Beach is awesome. I haven't seen it in years. It's totally ridiculous and campy and lame, but in the best way possible. They haven't released it on DVD though. D:

[malakijr]

I always saw Blood Beach on the shelves of our skeezy video rental place, the one that had tons of weird horror movies, but I never rented it and then they started selling their stock of VHS and by the time I looked for it someone already bought it.

Psychologists are the root of all evil. This is my new hypothesis.

[dr_christine]

That's where you'd find it. I saw it like, ten years ago with my grandpa and I thought he liked it as much as I did, so I found it at a skeezy video store and bought it for him without realizing he didn't think it was as awesome as I thought it was. I think it's still somewhere in my grandma's house, I just don't want to ask for it because my grandpa died and that would be weird.

It's kind of pointless, yeah. I just complain and she takes little notes and gives me bullshit advice, but hey, I'm not paying for it. But I'm really interested in psychology and wish I could have someone actually evaluate me without me having to worry about them shipping me off to a mental institution.

[malakijr]

Yeah, the rage that I have, if I told anyone about this (most people) they'd ship me away in a second. I don't know what else to do with it though. Movies help sometimes. Sometimes they make it worse.