But my black/hispanic/asian friend says...
Inspired by
littlebutfierce's post here.
In the journey to discovering just who you are, as a white person in a white-privilege world ,and what you want to do about it, you may be tempted to seek out those people you know who are (insert minority group here), and ask them questions about their feelings, their experience, how they think you are doing.
While the majority of them may appreciate you seeking enlightenment and understanding, you must realize that while you are on a voluntary journey, they have been riding this boat/bus/roller coaster their entire lives. They may have spent hours in person or on-line trying to explain the concept of white privilege, repeating to dumbasses that POC cannot ignore their identity for others bringing it to their attention day-by-day, hour-by-hour, saying the same thing forty different ways until someone gets it. They may be a little tired of answering questions, giving opinions for all persons of their race/ethnic origin.
They may be tempted to produce a card to hand to clueless crackers. What might this card say? My guilty white liberal guess begins here -
"Dear Feeling Guilty White Liberal: while I am glad you are looking into your privilege, and I do appreciate the effort you are making to learn about the racism that exists in the 21st century, it is not my job to educate you. Let me say that again - it is not my job, as your minority friend, to answer your endless questions about how POC feel about this or that issue. It is not my job to be there for you when you have a racist moment and need a shoulder to cry on because you feel so guilty. It is not my job to show you how to use web search engines to find information on the history of power + prejudice = racism. It is not my job to represent everyone with the same cultural heritage as me.
My job is to deal with the occurrences of racism that permeate my day, that shadow everything I do and say while I am outside my house, on the street and in the mall, and everything the radio, newspaper and television tell me about my race while I am inside my own home. It is my job to try to explain to my children and my nieces and nephews why the lady at the clothing store follows them around, and tell my little brother why the kids at school all think he should be good at math. It is my job to deal with this every day. Because of your skin color, you do not have to live with this every day. I have to deal with it. You deal with your own education.
When you can come to me with questions that pass beyond your guilt and reach deeper into the heart of a culture that screams there is no racism today while black men are being drug behind pickup trucks, when you can identify your own internal prejudices and reactions enough to work on changing them, when your responses to my responses are more than a series of repeated whys, then let's talk. In small doses. In my house. On my turf."
This is just a guess, but before you start asking questions, you may want to think about what you are asking, and how you've selected the person you ask.
littlebutfierce's post here.
In the journey to discovering just who you are, as a white person in a white-privilege world ,and what you want to do about it, you may be tempted to seek out those people you know who are (insert minority group here), and ask them questions about their feelings, their experience, how they think you are doing.
While the majority of them may appreciate you seeking enlightenment and understanding, you must realize that while you are on a voluntary journey, they have been riding this boat/bus/roller coaster their entire lives. They may have spent hours in person or on-line trying to explain the concept of white privilege, repeating to dumbasses that POC cannot ignore their identity for others bringing it to their attention day-by-day, hour-by-hour, saying the same thing forty different ways until someone gets it. They may be a little tired of answering questions, giving opinions for all persons of their race/ethnic origin.
They may be tempted to produce a card to hand to clueless crackers. What might this card say? My guilty white liberal guess begins here -
"Dear Feeling Guilty White Liberal: while I am glad you are looking into your privilege, and I do appreciate the effort you are making to learn about the racism that exists in the 21st century, it is not my job to educate you. Let me say that again - it is not my job, as your minority friend, to answer your endless questions about how POC feel about this or that issue. It is not my job to be there for you when you have a racist moment and need a shoulder to cry on because you feel so guilty. It is not my job to show you how to use web search engines to find information on the history of power + prejudice = racism. It is not my job to represent everyone with the same cultural heritage as me.
My job is to deal with the occurrences of racism that permeate my day, that shadow everything I do and say while I am outside my house, on the street and in the mall, and everything the radio, newspaper and television tell me about my race while I am inside my own home. It is my job to try to explain to my children and my nieces and nephews why the lady at the clothing store follows them around, and tell my little brother why the kids at school all think he should be good at math. It is my job to deal with this every day. Because of your skin color, you do not have to live with this every day. I have to deal with it. You deal with your own education.
When you can come to me with questions that pass beyond your guilt and reach deeper into the heart of a culture that screams there is no racism today while black men are being drug behind pickup trucks, when you can identify your own internal prejudices and reactions enough to work on changing them, when your responses to my responses are more than a series of repeated whys, then let's talk. In small doses. In my house. On my turf."
This is just a guess, but before you start asking questions, you may want to think about what you are asking, and how you've selected the person you ask.