i pick the blue ones every time
i dont even know what to say about the last 3 days or so,
had some really low lows...probably the worst since the early spring.
i've just spent most of the week really bummed out about a lot of things. some i shouldnt even worry about, its just an annoyance. and that plus everything i need to do for school has caused so much stress that i'm getting physically ill. i need to sleep for a whole day.
but i just had a decent conversation with someone i hadn't really thought about it a while. it's funny how things get put into perspective after a while. I don't believe in regrets, but sometimes i'm bitter about choices made in my past. I just need to be reassured that i've changed into a better person through everything and learned a lot from it. I'm well aware that those days are over, and they're not coming back. Things aren't the same. they won't ever be. I need to get out of here and continue growing up. I do have a lot left to learn, but i feel so old for my age in years. I've seen a lot.
i've decided as a whole i don't like people as much as i used to. some are really shitty. but there are a lot of great people who i've really attached myself to. this year really has been eye opening. My family has taken a stronger role in everything. somehow my mother is always right. it's crazy how after 21 years i can admit that. She's been really supportive these past few months. she lets me know that i'm headed the right direction. even though some days i wake up wondering if i really am. I've got a lot of things to fix. but I'm doing my best.
i just wish things felt right the past few days. I'm not one to doubt myself these days, but it's been catching up to me lately.
had some really low lows...probably the worst since the early spring.
i've just spent most of the week really bummed out about a lot of things. some i shouldnt even worry about, its just an annoyance. and that plus everything i need to do for school has caused so much stress that i'm getting physically ill. i need to sleep for a whole day.
but i just had a decent conversation with someone i hadn't really thought about it a while. it's funny how things get put into perspective after a while. I don't believe in regrets, but sometimes i'm bitter about choices made in my past. I just need to be reassured that i've changed into a better person through everything and learned a lot from it. I'm well aware that those days are over, and they're not coming back. Things aren't the same. they won't ever be. I need to get out of here and continue growing up. I do have a lot left to learn, but i feel so old for my age in years. I've seen a lot.
i've decided as a whole i don't like people as much as i used to. some are really shitty. but there are a lot of great people who i've really attached myself to. this year really has been eye opening. My family has taken a stronger role in everything. somehow my mother is always right. it's crazy how after 21 years i can admit that. She's been really supportive these past few months. she lets me know that i'm headed the right direction. even though some days i wake up wondering if i really am. I've got a lot of things to fix. but I'm doing my best.
i just wish things felt right the past few days. I'm not one to doubt myself these days, but it's been catching up to me lately.