When we last left off, Tsuna and Enma were being shounen Care Bear superheroes.
Hot Care Bear superheroes. My standards for KHR are really not that high. As long as someone is being particularly hot at least once per chapter, I'm happy. Toss in some bonus gayness and, if we've been extra good, a mountain or two of crack (and sometimes, if we made the right wish on the right shooting star at 11:11, we may even get character development), and I'm on cloud 9.
So I left chapter 339 on a happy note and am waiting patiently with my napkin folded in my lap for a delicious helping of chapter 340.
- "Tsuna and Enma's counterattack... explodes!" Well. What else was it going to do, I guess?
- DAMN YOU DAEMON SPADE, USING THE MOST GODMODEY OF ALL OF KHR'S ATTACKS IN THE WAY IT WAS ACTUALLY MEANT TO BE USED. Now why can't Gokudera do this, again?
- Incidentally, DID SISTEMA C.A.I. JUST MOTHERFUCKING BLOCK A MOTHERFUCKING COMBO ATTACK FROM TSUNA AND ENMA OR AM I CRAZY? Oh my God. I may or may not be completely interpreting this as evidence that Gokudera is capable of standing up to the mainest main characters in the power department, and at this point is just fully primed for his own fucking series or something. BE AN ACTION HERO, GOKUDERA. THE GUY WITH FIVE DIFFERENT TYPES OF FLAMES. AND THE SHIELDS THAT BLOCK EVERYTHING EVER. Please get an autograph for me from your good buddy Superman when you have lunch with him next week.
- ANYWAY, NOW THAT WE'RE DONE WITH TODAY'S EPISODE OF "IN MAKESTE'S MIND EVERYTHING IS ABOUT GOKUDERA!", LET'S MOVE ON.
- Oh my lord. How much bling can a man wear??!
- "VONGOLA GEAR THAT ISN'T OF THE SKY OR EARTH ELEMENT!" Did he actually shout this, because I am about to fall off my chair giggling. As a boss, Tsuna knows it's important to be as clear and specific as possible in any and all situations, so dammit, if he has to throw in that qualifier about them being all the rings except his and Enma's, HE WILL DO, IT BY GOD.
- By the way, I have never seen anything so ridiculous in my life, and just two chapters ago I was talking about how D. could never top Rock God Fairy Princess Fireworks Byakuran no matter how hard he tried! Oh, past me. You were so naive. NOT EVEN RGFPF!BYAKURAN IS A MATCH FOR GLOWY SWISS ARMY BANDOLIER SWORDY CLAWS DAEMON SPADE. THIS MAN KNOWS NO DIGNITY.
- AND TO TOP IT OFF, WHY NOT SIX OF HIM? WHY THE FUCK NOT. FUCK YOU EVERYONE. NO ONE CAN STAND UP TO THE POWER OF HIS SMUG VILLAIN FACE FROM SIX SIMULTANEOUS DIFFERENT ANGLES.
- At this point I would like to stop and clarify that even though I am typing in all caps, I am not actually yelling anything. I am just laughing so hard I am shaking all over.
- This is the chapter you all were trying to warn me about, isn't it. XDDD
- Every time Mukuro talks about how powerful Spade is in his body I crack up even more. I really need the anime back in my life so we can hear Mukuro's deep kufufu voice narrating all of this from the beak of a very concerned owl.
- Well, Enma, of course the blizzardroids were nothing compared to this, but that doesn't matter because YOU HAVE FUCKING BLACK HOLE FLAMES you silly little forgetful godmode you! I really wish the KHR universe didn't balance out the potential world-ending powers of its godmode characters by cursing them with spontaneous plot amnesia (ohoho, you think I'm cracking wise but then you think back to Lambo's last fight and you remember that this is actually a canon thing) whenever it's convenient.
- "TSUNA. EYES THIS WAY. YOUR OPPONENT IS US THREE SPADES, NOT THOSE SPADES." Well, to be fair, that has to be pretty confusing.
- He is so adorably concerned that with all these Spades attacking them, Enma might be out of his sight for more than five seconds.
- "My hands are my most powerful weapons so I will just flip upside-down and kick you with my feet now." Whatever works for you I guess?
- UPSIDE-DOWN SIDEWAYS-GLANCE TSUNA SHOUTING "AN ILLUSION!?" IS MY FAVORITE!
- Oh, is that what the desert element is? More illusions? I guess that makes sense, what with mirages and all.
- There goes Mukuro admiring how powerful the main villain is in his body, again.
- CRACKING UP AGAIN. "An illusionist, eh...?" You can actually see the wheels turning! Oh my God this is amazing. I wonder how long it would have actually taken her to put two and two together there if Spade hadn't gotten impatient and jumped the gun. (Probably still less time than if it had been one of the boys.)
- DAMN IT SPADE STOP MENACING CHROME ALREADY. If Owlkuro's face gets any more intense it might actually freeze that way!
- Yes, Mukuro. That's pretty much exactly what he thinks.
- And there's Reborn, once again wisely staying out of any battles in which he might actually work up a sweat and spoil that "so badass I'm untouchable" thing he's got going on. Lazy lil' punk.
- Hmm, Reborn. He kind of has a point, they're getting their asses kicked. On the other hand, Tsuna always wins in the end no matter what, so Reborn is right no matter how much evidence Daemon can point out to the contrary.
- Did Spade just slice Enma's gravity ball into little bits and pieces. ARE WE NOW EVEN BREAKING THE ESTABLISHED RULES OF OUR THINGS WHICH ALREADY BROKE ALL THE ESTABLISHED RULES? OR IS THE ANSWER TO THIS QUESTION SOMETHING MORE ALONG THE LINES OF, "WHAT ESTABLISHED RULES?!"
- Mukuro, seriously, just go fly somewhere and rub one off to your own amazing badassness already. We'll wait for you.
- Yeeees, but their elements are the best ones!
- Well, Tsuna and Enma, time to split into six clones of your own selves. If you actually did that I would have to follow owl!Mukuro's lead in skipping off for some happy time, incidentally.
- I love it when they think sentences at each other and understand. One day I want them to be sitting at a table and just having an entire conversation in hyper intuition back and forth at each other while everyone else watches in total confusion.
- Spade, you idiot, he's holding you still while Tsuna attacks. It's another combo. Weren't you paying any attention at all to the last freaking chapter?
- OH MY GOD, IS TSUNA ALSO TOO STUPID TO REALIZE WHAT ENMA IS TRYING TO DO?? WAKE UP, MAN! NOW THESE REALLY ARE SHOUTING CAPSLOCKS. JESUS.
- "TSUNA-KUN! SHOOT RIGHT IN THERE! ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID??!" Christ.
- It's okay, Tsuna! He'll get better! He did last time. Also you really have no choice at all so goddammit let's do this thing already.
Oh man. Ohhhhh man. SUSPENSE. I really hope Tsuna doesn't get traumatic crippling flashbacks to the last time the Jesusy new character of an arc sacrificed herself in order to kill the bad guy, because that would suuuuuuuuck. >_>