Patient #0 at a 45 Degree Angle
Let's give three cheers to destroying commitments and prior engagements that prevent you from making any error ever in your life.
Yep, it's awesome actually. You know what you call it?
Living. Not life. Living.
Do you ever wonder to yourself, "Hey, am I living? Am I alive?"
Check your pulse.
Are your pupils dilated?
Pull back some flesh, does it spring back into place?
None of these aforementioned tests indicate anything.
So your body is functioning. You are an effective module for the production of carbon dioxide, congratulations.
That doesn't mean you're alive.
"Paul, how do I know if I'm alive?"
Fuck somebody over.
Wrestle a polar bear.
Cheat death.
Slip through the cracks.
Slide through the mud on a rainy day.
Find the most important relic to you, and burn it.
That's right, create an effigy of the picture of you and your mother standing front of your house before your first day of kindergarten.
Your first record? Burn it.
The letters from the relationship that made you who you are? Burn them.
It's all useless.
There should never be anything to dwell on ever.
Religion, Politics, Relationships, Culture, History....
Why bother?
Live in the now my children.
There is no heaven, no hell, no apocalypse. No zen, nirvana, or fate.
Whatever you do that may have an effect on another person will have to be looked over in apathy by that person.
It doesn't fucking matter, people.
"But Paul, one of my best friends cheated with my girlfriend!"
Then girlfriend gets dropped, and you become closer friends with that best friend.
Bros before hos brotherhood, Sistas before playas sisterhood.
So on the count of three, create your effigy to living (not life) and go play in the mud.
1.......2.......3!
Yep, it's awesome actually. You know what you call it?
Living. Not life. Living.
Do you ever wonder to yourself, "Hey, am I living? Am I alive?"
Check your pulse.
Are your pupils dilated?
Pull back some flesh, does it spring back into place?
None of these aforementioned tests indicate anything.
So your body is functioning. You are an effective module for the production of carbon dioxide, congratulations.
That doesn't mean you're alive.
"Paul, how do I know if I'm alive?"
Fuck somebody over.
Wrestle a polar bear.
Cheat death.
Slip through the cracks.
Slide through the mud on a rainy day.
Find the most important relic to you, and burn it.
That's right, create an effigy of the picture of you and your mother standing front of your house before your first day of kindergarten.
Your first record? Burn it.
The letters from the relationship that made you who you are? Burn them.
It's all useless.
There should never be anything to dwell on ever.
Religion, Politics, Relationships, Culture, History....
Why bother?
Live in the now my children.
There is no heaven, no hell, no apocalypse. No zen, nirvana, or fate.
Whatever you do that may have an effect on another person will have to be looked over in apathy by that person.
It doesn't fucking matter, people.
"But Paul, one of my best friends cheated with my girlfriend!"
Then girlfriend gets dropped, and you become closer friends with that best friend.
Bros before hos brotherhood, Sistas before playas sisterhood.
So on the count of three, create your effigy to living (not life) and go play in the mud.
1.......2.......3!