How do you spell fun? I spell it "D-I-V-O-R-C-E C-O-U-R-T"
Went to court with my mom yesterday for my parent's first official hearing in the grisly year-long divorce battle that has come to define most of my life lately. It was stressful, yadda yadda, but that's not what this post is about.
I came into the room after walking my baby sister out of the building so she could go back to school, and the proceedings hadn't yet begun. As I'm crossing in front of my mom, she is laughing and says, "Jaime, you won't believe this. I dated that guy!" She points behind me. I turn around, and it's the bailiff. I stop and look him in the eye and said, "Wow. That's awkward."
Turns out he's the guy that my mom DUMPED to date my DAD. "What?!" I hear you all yelling right now. Yup. This officer of the court was once my father's friend, but me father stole his girlfriend (my mother) and they got into a couple fistfights over it (they must have been like 19) and never spoke again, until 28 years later, AKA yesterday. He was there for both the beginning and the end of my parents' relationship, like a pair of HTML command tags. /marriage
In the middle of the hearing, my mother, whose strength does not lay in subtlety, leans over to her attorney and says "That's the guy I should have married." Apparently, before my father clouded her vision, mom had pretty good taste in men. He was taller and broader than me, and in quite good shape. He had this greying mustache that looked very distinguished. That he is in some possible world my father creeped me out only a little bit.
On the way home, we were talking about how strange it was that he was there at all. She told me that he looked good, and I didn't think about how creepy this might sound, but I said "Mom, he was HOT".
I came into the room after walking my baby sister out of the building so she could go back to school, and the proceedings hadn't yet begun. As I'm crossing in front of my mom, she is laughing and says, "Jaime, you won't believe this. I dated that guy!" She points behind me. I turn around, and it's the bailiff. I stop and look him in the eye and said, "Wow. That's awkward."
Turns out he's the guy that my mom DUMPED to date my DAD. "What?!" I hear you all yelling right now. Yup. This officer of the court was once my father's friend, but me father stole his girlfriend (my mother) and they got into a couple fistfights over it (they must have been like 19) and never spoke again, until 28 years later, AKA yesterday. He was there for both the beginning and the end of my parents' relationship, like a pair of HTML command tags. /marriage
In the middle of the hearing, my mother, whose strength does not lay in subtlety, leans over to her attorney and says "That's the guy I should have married." Apparently, before my father clouded her vision, mom had pretty good taste in men. He was taller and broader than me, and in quite good shape. He had this greying mustache that looked very distinguished. That he is in some possible world my father creeped me out only a little bit.
On the way home, we were talking about how strange it was that he was there at all. She told me that he looked good, and I didn't think about how creepy this might sound, but I said "Mom, he was HOT".