grr argh
today=long... for a couple of reasons... number one... i felt anxious almost the entire day... why so you may ask... well you see because i did something somewhat dumb last night... or rather a couple of nights ago i started something stupid... and then proceeded on with it yesterday...
and before anybody jumps to any conclusions as to what it was... no its probably not what any of you are thinking... there is only one person that i have told about the stupid thing i was thinking about... and that is only because a) they are so very uninvolved in any part of the situation that they are completely unbiased...and b)i knew i could trust them to be non judgemental about it... which lets face it... unfortunatly for most everybody else you may have a... but not b... or b... but not a...
anyways the point of that rant was that for the entirety of today i felt nervous and anxious... because... well because i knew that i probably should not have said what i said to this person... and the fact that i did say it may have been a step to far... the other day i tried to prevent myself from saying anything to them by saying something to another person... but in the lack of a response...
well... you know when you want two different drinks from a vending machine... but you cant make up your mind... so what you decide to do is push both the buttons at the same time and hope for the best... well... i kind of had a moment like that... however it wasnt a vending machine... and i may have ended up with the wrong drink...
the other reason that today was very long was because of the lack of sleep last night... that and the fact that i told mel id watch her kids tonight... so straight from work to her house it was... therefore giving little ol' me no relaxing time between the two... yay for three small children... actually... more to the point... yay for three small children having a bed time and therefore going to sleep... i enjoy that... it means not only can i vent about the fact that im still al anxious... but i can vent about the fact that im still all anxious and having to watch three small children... which is not always the best of combinations... however i believe im doing quite well... i even calmed down the littleist one from a stubbed toe... blood and all... yay me...
haha... aww what a cute kitty... so warm and cuddley... now that shes not trying to type my entry for me that is... haha yes i am rambeling because there is no one online... okay bored now...someone needs to come online and prevent me from going and making a messy situation even more messy... hmmm ey? or y?... meh...damn
and before anybody jumps to any conclusions as to what it was... no its probably not what any of you are thinking... there is only one person that i have told about the stupid thing i was thinking about... and that is only because a) they are so very uninvolved in any part of the situation that they are completely unbiased...and b)i knew i could trust them to be non judgemental about it... which lets face it... unfortunatly for most everybody else you may have a... but not b... or b... but not a...
anyways the point of that rant was that for the entirety of today i felt nervous and anxious... because... well because i knew that i probably should not have said what i said to this person... and the fact that i did say it may have been a step to far... the other day i tried to prevent myself from saying anything to them by saying something to another person... but in the lack of a response...
well... you know when you want two different drinks from a vending machine... but you cant make up your mind... so what you decide to do is push both the buttons at the same time and hope for the best... well... i kind of had a moment like that... however it wasnt a vending machine... and i may have ended up with the wrong drink...
the other reason that today was very long was because of the lack of sleep last night... that and the fact that i told mel id watch her kids tonight... so straight from work to her house it was... therefore giving little ol' me no relaxing time between the two... yay for three small children... actually... more to the point... yay for three small children having a bed time and therefore going to sleep... i enjoy that... it means not only can i vent about the fact that im still al anxious... but i can vent about the fact that im still all anxious and having to watch three small children... which is not always the best of combinations... however i believe im doing quite well... i even calmed down the littleist one from a stubbed toe... blood and all... yay me...
haha... aww what a cute kitty... so warm and cuddley... now that shes not trying to type my entry for me that is... haha yes i am rambeling because there is no one online... okay bored now...someone needs to come online and prevent me from going and making a messy situation even more messy... hmmm ey? or y?... meh...damn