[It wasn't long ago that Rita awoke suddenly, after the horrific nightmares. She's not sure if it was a curse, if it was real, or what, but--Estelle. Estelle's crying. She desperately tries to talk to her on the communicator.]
E-Es...Estelle! A-are you all right?
[She hates how shaky her voice is, but she can't help it after everything.]
[Oh, Estelle--Rita's heart twists in her chest and she's dashing out of her lab at City Solutions where she's been staying since...since that weekend.]
Look, I-I'm on my way! Whatever's going on--just hang in there! You're at home, right?
[Dammit, Rita's so afraid of what might've happened. And it takes a little while, but she eventually arrives at the house and busts into Estelle's room--no knocking on the door or anything. She's out of breath from running all the way but doesn't stop to catch it, just goes immediately to Estelle's side and grabs her shoulder.]
[At least it's some response, but it doesn't relieve Rita at all. What could've possible made Estelle so upset? Some pretty horrible stuff happened in Rita's nightmares, but none of that would've had anything to do with her friend.
She tightens her grip on Estelle's shoulder, just trying to comfort her somehow and find out what's wrong.]
[ she wants to look at Rita again, but she's shut her eyes again. every time she looks at her, she sees the image of her disappearing, of her creating that horrible, terrible new Rita from her ...
... and her beating heart. She saw that heart. She saw it throbbing.
Her own heart throbbed in pain as she remembered.
She killed her. She killed Rita.
She didn't deserve--
No. She wanted to die. ]
I-I want to die ...
[ it's hard to hear at first, because she's still crying really hard, but she starts to say it over and over. ]
[Rita's not sure what she's hearing at first. No way, it couldn't be--there's absolutely no way Estelle would ever think that--but she can't mistake the words when they keep repeating.
And they're horrifically familiar. Does this mean Estelle was actually there in the nightmare? That she--Rita doesn't want to think about it any further. Right now, her friend is what matters.]
What are you saying, Estelle? You can't want that! I-I don't want to hear anything like that from you!
[This is way too familiar, but Rita's certain of what she's hearing. She suspected it was a curse, but not like this! Part of her is absolutely furious with the City for putting Estelle in such a state, though she tries to calm down and just focus on her friend.
It was her nightmare, after all, so she feels sort of responsible for what happened; even if she couldn't control it.
Unable to take it any longer, she squeezes her friend into a tight hug.]
Listen to me, Estelle. If this is about all of that--that other me--it wasn't real! It's not your fault!
No! [She's practically shouting and doesn't care. Anything to get through to her friend at this point.]
It wasn't you--no way--you're not the one who...[and it takes half a second for her to get it out, the memory still all to fresh in her own mind]...wh-who cut me open like that. It was all me. I'm that one that did all of that, so...so don't you dare go blaming yourself!
What did you tell me before, Estelle? That if I was going to blame myself for what I did, then I...I had to blame you for things, too. Well--well, now I'm telling it right back to you! Before you go pointing fingers at yourself or anything like that, you need to blame me first.
[Not taking her eyes off of Estelle. She just desperately wants her friend to come back, so badly.]
but Estelle also sees that she doesn't really have much of an argument, here. Rita's right. She did say that. And though she still blames herself, and though she's still very much upset at everything that took place during that nightmare, it's enough for her tears to slowly fade. She's left still somewhat of a complete mess, but at least she's not as much of a mess now as she was before?
Here, Rita. Estelle's hand might be reaching blindly to grasp yours.
She just needs to know that you're here right now. Here, and not some horrible, monstrous person. ]
( ooc: I feel so bad for not replying to Rita's post, bb, but I can't think of what Estelle would be doing in response at that point other than bawling her eyes out. ;A; )
E-Es...Estelle! A-are you all right?
[She hates how shaky her voice is, but she can't help it after everything.]
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Look, I-I'm on my way! Whatever's going on--just hang in there! You're at home, right?
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take that as a yes, Rita. ]
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Es...Es...telle...! A-are you...?
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She tightens her grip on Estelle's shoulder, just trying to comfort her somehow and find out what's wrong.]
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... and her beating heart. She saw that heart. She saw it throbbing.
Her own heart throbbed in pain as she remembered.
She killed her. She killed Rita.
She didn't deserve--
No. She wanted to die. ]
I-I want to die ...
[ it's hard to hear at first, because she's still crying really hard, but she starts to say it over and over. ]
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And they're horrifically familiar. Does this mean Estelle was actually there in the nightmare? That she--Rita doesn't want to think about it any further. Right now, her friend is what matters.]
What are you saying, Estelle? You can't want that! I-I don't want to hear anything like that from you!
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I'm a monster, I want to die ...
[ again, hard to understand. but she keeps saying it. ]
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It was her nightmare, after all, so she feels sort of responsible for what happened; even if she couldn't control it.
Unable to take it any longer, she squeezes her friend into a tight hug.]
Listen to me, Estelle. If this is about all of that--that other me--it wasn't real! It's not your fault!
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I-I killed you ... I killed you, I-I made you into someone horrible ...
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It wasn't you--no way--you're not the one who...[and it takes half a second for her to get it out, the memory still all to fresh in her own mind]...wh-who cut me open like that. It was all me. I'm that one that did all of that, so...so don't you dare go blaming yourself!
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and though she doesn't say anything in response to Rita, it's fairly obvious what she's thinking. ]
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[Not taking her eyes off of Estelle. She just desperately wants her friend to come back, so badly.]
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but Estelle also sees that she doesn't really have much of an argument, here. Rita's right. She did say that. And though she still blames herself, and though she's still very much upset at everything that took place during that nightmare, it's enough for her tears to slowly fade. She's left still somewhat of a complete mess, but at least she's not as much of a mess now as she was before?
Here, Rita. Estelle's hand might be reaching blindly to grasp yours.
She just needs to know that you're here right now. Here, and not some horrible, monstrous person. ]
( ooc: I feel so bad for not replying to Rita's post, bb, but I can't think of what Estelle would be doing in response at that point other than bawling her eyes out. ;A; )
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