Apo Pantos Kakodaimonos [8/11]
Title: Apo Pantos Kakodaimonos - 8
Pairing: OnTae
Genre: Romance/Supernatural/Slight Angst
Rating: PG-13 for slight violence
Summary: Onew was cursed to forever walk between Hell and Earth as a demon, lonely and unfeeling. He had no memory of why he was cursed, nor what the curse truly meant. All he knew was that bad things seemed to happen to everyone around him, including a certain human named Taemin that had a perverse attraction to his demonic nature. Demons are cursed to never feel any emotion, though, so matter how much Taemin loved him, he could never reciprocate the feeling, and no matter how much danger Taemin was put in, Onew could feel nothing whenever the human was on the verge of death. Or at least, that's what he thought.
[Excerpt] The angel cried out in grief, light bursting from his body. He fought through the demons surrounding him at an incredible rate, eyes never leaving Jinki’s. He lunged forward, wings propelling him. A desperate shout of Jinki’s name. An outstretched hand. Jinki felt himself being sucked into the ground, into the fiery depths below. He used the rest of his might to lean forward and reach for Taemin’s hand, even as he started to lose consciousness. He was almost there. Taemin’s hand was an inch from his grasp. Jinki closed his hand around...
♱ ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
My vision pulsed between red and black. Time almost ceased to exist, or else it passed without my knowledge. Pain was all there was. I did not know when it started, and I did not know when it would end. It was constant. It was terrible.
But amidst the pain, there were visions. But now I knew that they weren’t just visions.
They were memories.
Lee Jinki. Young and vivacious, but mature beyond his years. Genuinely kind. Curious about everything. He had that effect on those around him where his sweetness just melted everyone’s hearts. His parents raised him that way, and he lived by their lessons. The neighborhood he grew up in was just as beautiful and kind as Jinki himself. Bright skies, tall trees, and fragrant flowers. Laughing children and smiling faces. Full of life and love and happiness.
But things began to change. The bright lights of the neighborhood turned dark at night. Too dark. This darkness stole the light, the hope, the happiness from the neighborhood. Fewer and fewer people ventured out of their houses. People stopped talking to each other. Women clung tightly to their purses. Men clung tightly to their wives. Fear creeped in and took hold of everyone as the darkness spread further and further.
It was at this time, amidst the change from good to bad, that Jinki was changing from a boy to a man. He would have to choose whether to stay with the light or succumb to the enticing darkness. Such was the choice within everybody.
It started with one person. Then another. And another. Then a block. Then a whole street. Then an entire neighborhood. The darkness invaded like the plague, its evil tendrils reaching out and taking over anyone it encountered. Jinki would have to change his path to school every few weeks whenever a gang would claim certain sections as their territory. There were certain parts of school that he never dared venture near, for even his classmates had been touched by the darkness. He witnessed drug exchanges, noticed the bulges of guns or knives in some people’s pockets, and saw scantily-clad women roaming the streets or hanging off of tattooed men.
He even watched his best friend succumb to the pull of evil - to the allure of a life on the edge, full of drugs and sex and danger. No matter how much he tried to stop her, she just slipped from his grasp and faded into the black.
One night, Jinki spent his time huddled up in the corner of his room, gunshots sounding just a little too close to be comfortable. He flinched at every crack of the bullet and at every scream and shout that accompanied it. Only his father returned home that night. His mother never did. In the middle of his grieving, he made a promise to himself; a promise to devote all his time to saving his neighborhood, his home, and his best friend. A promise that he made sure he would see through until the end. Though he knew that the end he spoke of would not be the end of the violence, but rather the end of his life as he tried to stop the violence. A martyr’s death.
When he graduated from school, he took action. Jinki talked to everyone he could, peacefully trying to persuade them to join him in bringing light back to the neighborhood. His influence spread to many people, but it was not enough. Things were progressing beyond his control. No matter how much Jinki knew he had to keep a positive, bright attitude in front of others, it was when he was alone that he felt his fear. The threat of darkness loomed all around him. It had already taken the ones he loved. It almost seemed to be waiting for him, lingering around until Jinki was at his weakest so that it could rear its evil head and strike.
But when that breaking point came, it wasn’t darkness that struck, but light. A light that was blinding, yet comforting. A light that embraced him from all sides and took his fears away. A light that emanated from a single person in front of him, scintillating white wings stretched wide, feathers shifting with each contraction of muscle. A hand reached out from this person and caressed Jinki’s face. The hand felt soft and feather-light as it lingered on Jinki’s tear-stained cheeks. The angel then kneeled before him in a formal bow, each movement of his flowing and graceful. When he finished, he locked eyes with Jinki and spoke with a bell-like voice.
“I was sent here to guide you, for the brightness in your heart shines bright even from Heaven. I will always be by your side to protect you as you strive toward your destiny. Consider me as your guardian angel.”
The angel bowed again. When he stood, his wings folded onto his back, and the brightness radiating from his body began to fade slowly. Soon, he looked just like any other human besides the unnatural glitter of his ivory skin and the aura of bliss and happiness that surrounded him. He offered a dazzling smile to Jinki and an outstretched hand for the other to take.
“Is there a name I can call you by?” Jinki asked, his hand reaching out but then hesitating just above the angel’s.
“Taemin,” the angel whispered, closing the distance between their hands and intertwining their fingers together.
As promised, the angel remained at Jinki’s side day and night. Jinki stepped up his efforts on saving the neighborhood, and he saw even more results than before. It was all thanks to Taemin. Together, they were making a difference. Together, they were saving lives. Jinki and Taemin grew closer and closer as they spent so much time next to each other. Jinki came to admire the energy and passion that Taemin possessed and spread to others; the way Taemin always glowed with happiness and hope; the angel’s inexhaustible smile. With every look, every touch, and every laugh, Jinki became more and more entranced. Infatuated. In love. Yet, knowing he couldn’t do anything about his feelings, Jinki satisfied himself by just keeping the angel by his side, making a place for the angel in his idea of the perfect destiny he was striving to achieve.
After many months side by side and many people saved from the darkness, Jinki decided to take a chance and enter the territory of one of the strongest gangs in the area. He had already influenced some of the members to sympathise with him, so he knew he’d be safely led to the gang’s leader. However, this was the first time he ever saw Taemin hesitate when he told the angel of his plans. Taemin averted his eyes and traced shapes on the floor with his foot. Not understanding his reluctance, Jinki repeated his plans, this time asking the angel what his opinion was on the matter.
“I think you should do what you feel you need to do. It is your destiny after all, and I have no right to interfere with your decisions,” Taemin replied without looking at Jinki once.
“But do you think that I can accomplish something if I do this?”
His response was quiet and sounded strained, laced with an underlying meaning that Jinki couldn’t decipher.
“I know you will.”
Although Jinki was confused and just a bit uneasy because of Taemin’s response, he still set out the next day to talk with the gang leader. The image of the angel’s face as he left was etched in the front of his consciousness. He just couldn’t forget the wide almond-shaped eyes shining with tears, and the way his mouth was trying to offer a reassuring smile although his eyes revealed a completely opposite feeling. However, Jinki continued to walk away, making sure Taemin stayed behind so he wasn’t put in danger.
As planned, Jinki was lead straight to the leader safely. A surprise awaited him there, though, for the leader turned out to be his former best friend. Jinki had not been prepared to see her, especially after all this time, and it left him fumbling for words in his shock. She just stared at him with a delighted smirk on her face, and proceeded to laugh hysterically when Jinki finally asked her if she would give up the gang and go back to the way she was before. All of Jinki’s pleas fell on deaf ears. He began to feel nervous and slightly scared, not entirely sure if he would make it out alive this time. Knowing that Taemin had been hesitant to send him here doubled his suspicions. He was going to die here. He was going to die at the hands of his best friend.
The clang of metal pipes against the concrete floor alerted him to the approaching presence of people behind him. His best friend took slow steps toward him, hand reaching into her pocket and pulling out a small hand gun. Jinki looked around him for a chance to escape. There was none. He was completely surrounded. Bats slapped against palms. Pocket knives flipped open. People chuckled. Jinki closed his eyes and tried to relax his body. This was the end, so he might as well accept it. He prayed that his death would not be in vain, and that he’d be able to see his mother in Heaven. And Taemin...he’d be able to be with Taemin if he were an angel, too. He heard the click of a gun being cocked. And then a shot. And then...
...he was floating. It felt like someone had their arms wrapped around him and was carrying him off to somewhere. Was this what it felt like when you died? When your soul ascended to Heaven? But then Jinki opened his eyes. He was in an open field of tall grass within the shaking arms of Taemin. The angel’s face was contorted in tears, fitful sobs racking his chest and breath coming in short gasps between sobs.
“W-What happened? Taemin?”
The angel didn’t look at him and just continued to utter the same phrase over and over again.
“I should’ve let you die...I should’ve let you die...I should’ve let you die!”
Heavier sobs tormented his small body. Jinki tried to soothe him by running a hand through the angel’s ash-blonde tresses, or by rubbing slow circles on his back, or by wiping off the falling tears with a thumb.
“Jinki...” Taemin said, lifting his head up to look the other in the eyes and bringing his hands to Jinki’s face. Taemin continued to shakily move his hands all over Jinki’s face, in his hair, down his neck, around his shoulders, as if not believing that the other was really right in front of him.
“E-Everyone is born with a skeleton of a destiny,” he began, barely understandable because of his tear-soaked voice and chest-rattling sobs. “It solidifies as y-you grow up. Your destiny was to ch-change this town with my help. Destinies aren’t supposed to be altered by anyone other than the h-human whose destiny it is. You...you were supposed to die.”
Jinki felt a chill run through his body at those words.
“Y-You die and then it angers the people that supported you. They all rise up a-and change the town back to how it was before. The darkness leaves and the light stays there forever. A h-happy ending...”
“Then...why did you save me?”
Taemin’s hands came to a stop and rested on Jinki’s cheeks, gently holding his face as Taemin made sure his words were heard amidst his crying.
“Because I love you.”
He leaned forward and captured Jinki’s lips in a desperate kiss. The angel’s lips were soft as a cloud and salty with the trace of tears. He held on tightly to Jinki’s face, as if afraid that letting go would make him disappear. Jinki responded by wrapping his hands around Taemin’s waist and holding him there. He made sure to let Taemin know that he wasn’t dead and that he wasn’t going to disappear. He was alive, and his angel was right beside him. That’s all he needed.
They spent that night in each other’s arms, gazing at the stars above and at the stars reflected in their eyes. Half the time, Taemin stole his breath away with kiss after kiss. The other times, Taemin turned away from him and cried. It broke Jinki’s heart every time. The angel gave no explanation for his bipolar attitude, and Jinki couldn’t find the courage to ask him the questions that burned in his mind. It wasn’t until much later that Taemin stilled in his movements and mood shifts. He paused. Looked up at the sky. Reached a hand out as if to touch the very stars he stared so longingly at. Lowered his arm slowly, dejectedly.
“Jinki...I don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow. Or the day after that. I used to know, but I...I changed your destiny. Nothing is clear anymore. It scares me.”
Jinki reached a hand out to wipe away the tear that escaped from Taemin’s eye.
“Why did you save me? Wouldn’t I have become an angel if I died? Then we’d...we’d be able to be together, right?”
“Even though you know someone is headed for a better life, it still is tough to watch them die. And when you know you can save them, it is even harder. Jinki...I couldn’t let you die.”
Taemin breathed in deeply and closed his eyes. He brought his hand to his face and took hold of Jinki’s hand that still rested there. Both of them stayed silent, wishing that time would stop for they feared the coming of the new, uncertain day.
“Angels are not supposed to fall in love with humans. They get too attached. They only want good things to happen to their human and end up changing their destiny. The only person who should change a destiny is the person whom the destiny belongs to. Otherwise, the future becomes uncertain. The skeleton of a destiny that the human was born with falls apart. Neither Heaven nor Hell knows what will happen next, and that can have disastrous consequences.”
The hand holding Jinki’s tightened its grasp. The almond eyes opened, their look full of uncertainty and fear.
“I don’t know what I’ve started by saving you. This could well be our last night together.”
As the night ended and tomorrow came, the sky stayed dark even during the day. Taemin was always on edge, feeling panicky if he wasn’t holding on to Jinki in some way. Day after day passed. Jinki couldn’t keep still. He had to go help his neighborhood, even though Taemin was adamant that he stop and stay inside with him away from the darkness. The darkness that Taemin felt growing bigger and bigger every day, infused with the anger and hatred of Hell itself. But Jinki said no. Taemin was there to help him reach his destiny, right? He could not just stop saving people.
So with a kiss goodbye, Jinki left. He walked the streets of his neighborhood, smiling and talking to the people he found. He tried his best to give them encouragement, support, and hope for a better, brighter day. Hours and hours passed, and he eventually found himself on a familiar street. It was this street that he was led down a while ago where he wasn’t sure if he would come back alive. A figure sat in the middle of the cracked pavement, back facing Jinki, throwing pebbles at nothing in particular. At Jinki’s footsteps, the figure stopped and sprang up with a rock in hand, instantly on guard. It was her. When she saw Jinki, her mouth fell open in shock. She dropped the rock just as her knees hit the pavement, screaming in anguish. Jinki ran to her without a second thought, holding her close and whispering words of comfort as she cried into his chest. She couldn’t believe that he was alive. She was so sorry that she almost killed him. She wanted out. She wanted Jinki to help her change back. To help her see the light again.
“I’m so tired of the dark, Jinki. You don’t know what else resides there in the shadows. They’re scary.”
Jinki helped his friend stand up from the ground and had her lean on him as he walked. She must have been delusional from stress or drugs with the way she was talking and muttering to herself. If Jinki could bring her to Taemin, he knew the angel could cure her. He was about to have his best friend back. He had spent years fighting for his cause and fighting to save those he loved. Maybe things would turn out okay. Maybe his destiny would come true without his death.
His friend’s body started to become heavier and heavier. Jinki turned his head toward her to ask what was wrong when he saw her face trapped in a shocked expression. She convulsed and dropped to the ground, eyes rolling to the back of her head as she spasmed on the ground. Steam started rising from her body. Her eyes flashed yellow. Jinki yelled out her name. Something was not right. He looked up at the sound of guttural snarls only to find himself surrounded by several grotesque creatures. Their skin was grey and patchy, full of crusted blood and scars. Yellow eyes full of malice. Spindly wings popping and cracking with every movement. What were these things? They weren’t people, but they weren’t animals, either. The atmosphere around them was dark and suffocating. They looked at Jinki with twitching eyes and convoluted smiles.
Hands crawled up his back and wrapped around his neck for a second before they left. Jinki’s friend stepped around to face him. Though her body was normal, her eyes glowed yellow.
“Where’s the angel?” she questioned. Her voice was deeper than usual and carried screeching overtones that assaulted Jinki’s ears when he listened to it.
Nobody knew that Taemin was an angel. He never showed anyone else his wings. How did she know? Maybe it had something to do with the glow in her eyes.
“I-I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Don’t play dumb with me! I’m not who you think I am anymore.”
He had never stopped to think that if there were angels, there must be other things as well; other things that were the exact opposite of the goodness that radiated from beings like Taemin. Things like demons. The darkness that invaded the neighborhood wasn’t just darkness, but it was the darkness of Hell. And they were after Taemin. Not him, but Taemin.
“Please...tell me what’s happening...w-why are you acting so differently? Please come with me, I-I’ll help you!”
She just scoffed at his pleas. Her eyes turned to slits as she uttered a low growl. Her skin began to melt off of her face and body to reveal grey skin underneath. Jinki turned to run but barely took a few steps before he felt spindly fingers on his arm yanking him back. He fell to the ground with a grunt of pain. Claws scratched through his clothes onto his skin. Feet slammed into his side, causing a few of his ribs to crack. He screamed in agony. But with every kick, every punch, every scratch, the only thing that went through Jinki’s mind was Taemin.
So he screamed. He screamed Taemin’s name. It hurt his lungs worse than the kicks and punches, but he didn’t stop screaming. Screaming for him not to come. It’s a trap. It’s a trap. Taemin, it’s a trap. He prayed to the Heaven that Taemin came from to keep the angel away. Jinki would rather die than see anything happen to Taemin. To his angel. To his love.
Still, that bright light appeared. All the demons shrieked and covered their eyes from the brightness. Jinki painfully rose to his hands and knees, coughing up blood on the way. He could see that Taemin’s eyes were narrowed and that his nostrils flared in rage. He was poised and ready for a fight. Jinki screamed at him, telling him to leave. Telling him to go. Telling him that it’s not safe. The angel didn’t seem to hear him, though.
All of the demons turned to Taemin and attacked, leaving Jinki alone on the ground. He stood up as quickly as he could, all his bones and muscles protesting against the movement. But his heart wouldn’t let him stay still. Taemin. Taemin. Taemin. Was it his mind repeating that name over and over, or was it his ears that were hearing him scream it? He couldn’t tell. Jinki leaped onto the nearest demon, hands scratching at the moist, decrepit skin until he was easily flung off. This time, Jinki’s body wouldn’t let him get back up.
Taemin easily overpowered the demons that were attacking him, even though he was far outnumbered. He was completely focused on the battle. The screams from Jinki went unnoticed. No matter how much Jinki called out to him, the angel did not hear. It was only when Jinki was flung back to the ground that Taemin caught his eye. Jinki was saying something. Saying that he should leave. Saying that it’s a trap.
The ground suddenly shook beneath them. The air became hot and sulfuric. All the demons screeched and howled in ecstasy. Jinki saw realization dawn in Taemin’s eyes before they were overtaken by absolute horror. A sharp pain erupted in Jinki’s chest. When he looked down, he saw that a demon had stabbed him straight through the heart. Blood dripped from the wound and from Jinki’s mouth. He took one last look at Taemin. Reached out a shaky hand.
The angel cried out in grief, light bursting from his body. He fought through the demons surrounding him at an incredible rate, eyes never leaving Jinki’s. He lunged forward, wings propelling him. A desperate shout of Jinki’s name. An outstretched hand. Jinki felt himself being sucked into the ground, into the fiery depths below. He used the rest of his might to lean forward and reach for Taemin’s hand, even as he started to lose consciousness. He was almost there. Taemin’s hand was an inch from his grasp. Jinki closed his hand around...
...nothing. He fell down into the blackness, the last image being Taemin’s hand grasping at empty space.
My eyes fluttered open and then immediately crinkled shut. The air burned my eyes. I tried to take a deep breath but ended up coughing over the ash that filled my lungs. I forced my eyes to open despite the pain.
And looked into the eyes of the God of Hell.
It crinkled its already deformed face into one of even more disgust, letting out a quick scoff.
“Ugh, you reek. Love is so disgusting.”
Its grating voice shook my bones. My fingers tensed at the discomfort. I tried to move my feet and arms only to realize that there were demons holding on to all of my limbs. As I stood looking at their gnarled hands, the memories I just had came back to me full force. I gasped at their impact, heart suddenly pounding rapidly. I snapped my head back up to face the monster in front of me. My limbs twitched. My skin began to steam. My eyes reflected the fire of the devil’s garb, representing the burning hatred within my soul.
“Where’s Taemin?” I snapped. “What did you do to him?”
If the devil sent those demons, could he have also destroyed Taemin’s wings? What happened to Taemin after I disappeared? That monster killed my mom, destroyed my neighborhood, turned my best friend into a demon, and took Taemin away from me. What else was he capable of? I wasn’t just going to stand here and find out. I struggled violently against the demons’ hold. The effort was futile, though. I was still weak.
The monster chuckled.
“I see you remember. Who would have thought the curse had that kind of flaw...being around someone even remotely heavenly will weaken it. Oh well, it is all for the best now. I am so close to claiming an angel.”
I clenched my fists, nails digging into my palm.
“What are you going to do to him? Where is he?! Tell me right now!”
“Calm down, I do not have him. Yet. But thanks to you, I am so close. I will make Taemin a demon soon, and then I will have a way to enter Heaven and destroy it!”
The flames moved in a hellish dance as the devil roared with maniacal laughter. I struggled against the arms that held me down and, with a loud scream, was able to wrench myself from their grasp and sprint toward the God of Hell. I felt my bones crack and skin peel as I prepared to transform into my demon form. All rationale slipped away. I wanted to kill it. Kill the monster that wanted to hurt my Taemin.
“No! I won’t let you!”
“I would like to see you try. You are still my puppet, remember?”
With one look, I was stopped dead in my tracks. I couldn’t move no matter how much I struggled. Some invisible force had immobilized me. I looked up at the devil with all the fury I could muster, growling dangerously.
Instead of looking scared, it just cackled even more at my reaction.
“Oh, my Onew...soon, all Hell will break loose!”
And with that, it drew itself up to full height and shot out one of its arms toward me, swatting me away like a pesky fly. I was launched backwards by the force of the blow. It seemed like an eternity before my back slammed against solid ground.
Though when I sat up, I noticed that I didn’t land in Hell.
I was on Earth.
Surrounded by dead bodies.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________ ♱
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Pairing: OnTae
Genre: Romance/Supernatural/Slight Angst
Rating: PG-13 for slight violence
Summary: Onew was cursed to forever walk between Hell and Earth as a demon, lonely and unfeeling. He had no memory of why he was cursed, nor what the curse truly meant. All he knew was that bad things seemed to happen to everyone around him, including a certain human named Taemin that had a perverse attraction to his demonic nature. Demons are cursed to never feel any emotion, though, so matter how much Taemin loved him, he could never reciprocate the feeling, and no matter how much danger Taemin was put in, Onew could feel nothing whenever the human was on the verge of death. Or at least, that's what he thought.
[Excerpt] The angel cried out in grief, light bursting from his body. He fought through the demons surrounding him at an incredible rate, eyes never leaving Jinki’s. He lunged forward, wings propelling him. A desperate shout of Jinki’s name. An outstretched hand. Jinki felt himself being sucked into the ground, into the fiery depths below. He used the rest of his might to lean forward and reach for Taemin’s hand, even as he started to lose consciousness. He was almost there. Taemin’s hand was an inch from his grasp. Jinki closed his hand around...
♱ ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
My vision pulsed between red and black. Time almost ceased to exist, or else it passed without my knowledge. Pain was all there was. I did not know when it started, and I did not know when it would end. It was constant. It was terrible.
But amidst the pain, there were visions. But now I knew that they weren’t just visions.
They were memories.
Lee Jinki. Young and vivacious, but mature beyond his years. Genuinely kind. Curious about everything. He had that effect on those around him where his sweetness just melted everyone’s hearts. His parents raised him that way, and he lived by their lessons. The neighborhood he grew up in was just as beautiful and kind as Jinki himself. Bright skies, tall trees, and fragrant flowers. Laughing children and smiling faces. Full of life and love and happiness.
But things began to change. The bright lights of the neighborhood turned dark at night. Too dark. This darkness stole the light, the hope, the happiness from the neighborhood. Fewer and fewer people ventured out of their houses. People stopped talking to each other. Women clung tightly to their purses. Men clung tightly to their wives. Fear creeped in and took hold of everyone as the darkness spread further and further.
It was at this time, amidst the change from good to bad, that Jinki was changing from a boy to a man. He would have to choose whether to stay with the light or succumb to the enticing darkness. Such was the choice within everybody.
It started with one person. Then another. And another. Then a block. Then a whole street. Then an entire neighborhood. The darkness invaded like the plague, its evil tendrils reaching out and taking over anyone it encountered. Jinki would have to change his path to school every few weeks whenever a gang would claim certain sections as their territory. There were certain parts of school that he never dared venture near, for even his classmates had been touched by the darkness. He witnessed drug exchanges, noticed the bulges of guns or knives in some people’s pockets, and saw scantily-clad women roaming the streets or hanging off of tattooed men.
He even watched his best friend succumb to the pull of evil - to the allure of a life on the edge, full of drugs and sex and danger. No matter how much he tried to stop her, she just slipped from his grasp and faded into the black.
One night, Jinki spent his time huddled up in the corner of his room, gunshots sounding just a little too close to be comfortable. He flinched at every crack of the bullet and at every scream and shout that accompanied it. Only his father returned home that night. His mother never did. In the middle of his grieving, he made a promise to himself; a promise to devote all his time to saving his neighborhood, his home, and his best friend. A promise that he made sure he would see through until the end. Though he knew that the end he spoke of would not be the end of the violence, but rather the end of his life as he tried to stop the violence. A martyr’s death.
When he graduated from school, he took action. Jinki talked to everyone he could, peacefully trying to persuade them to join him in bringing light back to the neighborhood. His influence spread to many people, but it was not enough. Things were progressing beyond his control. No matter how much Jinki knew he had to keep a positive, bright attitude in front of others, it was when he was alone that he felt his fear. The threat of darkness loomed all around him. It had already taken the ones he loved. It almost seemed to be waiting for him, lingering around until Jinki was at his weakest so that it could rear its evil head and strike.
But when that breaking point came, it wasn’t darkness that struck, but light. A light that was blinding, yet comforting. A light that embraced him from all sides and took his fears away. A light that emanated from a single person in front of him, scintillating white wings stretched wide, feathers shifting with each contraction of muscle. A hand reached out from this person and caressed Jinki’s face. The hand felt soft and feather-light as it lingered on Jinki’s tear-stained cheeks. The angel then kneeled before him in a formal bow, each movement of his flowing and graceful. When he finished, he locked eyes with Jinki and spoke with a bell-like voice.
“I was sent here to guide you, for the brightness in your heart shines bright even from Heaven. I will always be by your side to protect you as you strive toward your destiny. Consider me as your guardian angel.”
The angel bowed again. When he stood, his wings folded onto his back, and the brightness radiating from his body began to fade slowly. Soon, he looked just like any other human besides the unnatural glitter of his ivory skin and the aura of bliss and happiness that surrounded him. He offered a dazzling smile to Jinki and an outstretched hand for the other to take.
“Is there a name I can call you by?” Jinki asked, his hand reaching out but then hesitating just above the angel’s.
“Taemin,” the angel whispered, closing the distance between their hands and intertwining their fingers together.
As promised, the angel remained at Jinki’s side day and night. Jinki stepped up his efforts on saving the neighborhood, and he saw even more results than before. It was all thanks to Taemin. Together, they were making a difference. Together, they were saving lives. Jinki and Taemin grew closer and closer as they spent so much time next to each other. Jinki came to admire the energy and passion that Taemin possessed and spread to others; the way Taemin always glowed with happiness and hope; the angel’s inexhaustible smile. With every look, every touch, and every laugh, Jinki became more and more entranced. Infatuated. In love. Yet, knowing he couldn’t do anything about his feelings, Jinki satisfied himself by just keeping the angel by his side, making a place for the angel in his idea of the perfect destiny he was striving to achieve.
After many months side by side and many people saved from the darkness, Jinki decided to take a chance and enter the territory of one of the strongest gangs in the area. He had already influenced some of the members to sympathise with him, so he knew he’d be safely led to the gang’s leader. However, this was the first time he ever saw Taemin hesitate when he told the angel of his plans. Taemin averted his eyes and traced shapes on the floor with his foot. Not understanding his reluctance, Jinki repeated his plans, this time asking the angel what his opinion was on the matter.
“I think you should do what you feel you need to do. It is your destiny after all, and I have no right to interfere with your decisions,” Taemin replied without looking at Jinki once.
“But do you think that I can accomplish something if I do this?”
His response was quiet and sounded strained, laced with an underlying meaning that Jinki couldn’t decipher.
“I know you will.”
Although Jinki was confused and just a bit uneasy because of Taemin’s response, he still set out the next day to talk with the gang leader. The image of the angel’s face as he left was etched in the front of his consciousness. He just couldn’t forget the wide almond-shaped eyes shining with tears, and the way his mouth was trying to offer a reassuring smile although his eyes revealed a completely opposite feeling. However, Jinki continued to walk away, making sure Taemin stayed behind so he wasn’t put in danger.
As planned, Jinki was lead straight to the leader safely. A surprise awaited him there, though, for the leader turned out to be his former best friend. Jinki had not been prepared to see her, especially after all this time, and it left him fumbling for words in his shock. She just stared at him with a delighted smirk on her face, and proceeded to laugh hysterically when Jinki finally asked her if she would give up the gang and go back to the way she was before. All of Jinki’s pleas fell on deaf ears. He began to feel nervous and slightly scared, not entirely sure if he would make it out alive this time. Knowing that Taemin had been hesitant to send him here doubled his suspicions. He was going to die here. He was going to die at the hands of his best friend.
The clang of metal pipes against the concrete floor alerted him to the approaching presence of people behind him. His best friend took slow steps toward him, hand reaching into her pocket and pulling out a small hand gun. Jinki looked around him for a chance to escape. There was none. He was completely surrounded. Bats slapped against palms. Pocket knives flipped open. People chuckled. Jinki closed his eyes and tried to relax his body. This was the end, so he might as well accept it. He prayed that his death would not be in vain, and that he’d be able to see his mother in Heaven. And Taemin...he’d be able to be with Taemin if he were an angel, too. He heard the click of a gun being cocked. And then a shot. And then...
...he was floating. It felt like someone had their arms wrapped around him and was carrying him off to somewhere. Was this what it felt like when you died? When your soul ascended to Heaven? But then Jinki opened his eyes. He was in an open field of tall grass within the shaking arms of Taemin. The angel’s face was contorted in tears, fitful sobs racking his chest and breath coming in short gasps between sobs.
“W-What happened? Taemin?”
The angel didn’t look at him and just continued to utter the same phrase over and over again.
“I should’ve let you die...I should’ve let you die...I should’ve let you die!”
Heavier sobs tormented his small body. Jinki tried to soothe him by running a hand through the angel’s ash-blonde tresses, or by rubbing slow circles on his back, or by wiping off the falling tears with a thumb.
“Jinki...” Taemin said, lifting his head up to look the other in the eyes and bringing his hands to Jinki’s face. Taemin continued to shakily move his hands all over Jinki’s face, in his hair, down his neck, around his shoulders, as if not believing that the other was really right in front of him.
“E-Everyone is born with a skeleton of a destiny,” he began, barely understandable because of his tear-soaked voice and chest-rattling sobs. “It solidifies as y-you grow up. Your destiny was to ch-change this town with my help. Destinies aren’t supposed to be altered by anyone other than the h-human whose destiny it is. You...you were supposed to die.”
Jinki felt a chill run through his body at those words.
“Y-You die and then it angers the people that supported you. They all rise up a-and change the town back to how it was before. The darkness leaves and the light stays there forever. A h-happy ending...”
“Then...why did you save me?”
Taemin’s hands came to a stop and rested on Jinki’s cheeks, gently holding his face as Taemin made sure his words were heard amidst his crying.
“Because I love you.”
He leaned forward and captured Jinki’s lips in a desperate kiss. The angel’s lips were soft as a cloud and salty with the trace of tears. He held on tightly to Jinki’s face, as if afraid that letting go would make him disappear. Jinki responded by wrapping his hands around Taemin’s waist and holding him there. He made sure to let Taemin know that he wasn’t dead and that he wasn’t going to disappear. He was alive, and his angel was right beside him. That’s all he needed.
They spent that night in each other’s arms, gazing at the stars above and at the stars reflected in their eyes. Half the time, Taemin stole his breath away with kiss after kiss. The other times, Taemin turned away from him and cried. It broke Jinki’s heart every time. The angel gave no explanation for his bipolar attitude, and Jinki couldn’t find the courage to ask him the questions that burned in his mind. It wasn’t until much later that Taemin stilled in his movements and mood shifts. He paused. Looked up at the sky. Reached a hand out as if to touch the very stars he stared so longingly at. Lowered his arm slowly, dejectedly.
“Jinki...I don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow. Or the day after that. I used to know, but I...I changed your destiny. Nothing is clear anymore. It scares me.”
Jinki reached a hand out to wipe away the tear that escaped from Taemin’s eye.
“Why did you save me? Wouldn’t I have become an angel if I died? Then we’d...we’d be able to be together, right?”
“Even though you know someone is headed for a better life, it still is tough to watch them die. And when you know you can save them, it is even harder. Jinki...I couldn’t let you die.”
Taemin breathed in deeply and closed his eyes. He brought his hand to his face and took hold of Jinki’s hand that still rested there. Both of them stayed silent, wishing that time would stop for they feared the coming of the new, uncertain day.
“Angels are not supposed to fall in love with humans. They get too attached. They only want good things to happen to their human and end up changing their destiny. The only person who should change a destiny is the person whom the destiny belongs to. Otherwise, the future becomes uncertain. The skeleton of a destiny that the human was born with falls apart. Neither Heaven nor Hell knows what will happen next, and that can have disastrous consequences.”
The hand holding Jinki’s tightened its grasp. The almond eyes opened, their look full of uncertainty and fear.
“I don’t know what I’ve started by saving you. This could well be our last night together.”
As the night ended and tomorrow came, the sky stayed dark even during the day. Taemin was always on edge, feeling panicky if he wasn’t holding on to Jinki in some way. Day after day passed. Jinki couldn’t keep still. He had to go help his neighborhood, even though Taemin was adamant that he stop and stay inside with him away from the darkness. The darkness that Taemin felt growing bigger and bigger every day, infused with the anger and hatred of Hell itself. But Jinki said no. Taemin was there to help him reach his destiny, right? He could not just stop saving people.
So with a kiss goodbye, Jinki left. He walked the streets of his neighborhood, smiling and talking to the people he found. He tried his best to give them encouragement, support, and hope for a better, brighter day. Hours and hours passed, and he eventually found himself on a familiar street. It was this street that he was led down a while ago where he wasn’t sure if he would come back alive. A figure sat in the middle of the cracked pavement, back facing Jinki, throwing pebbles at nothing in particular. At Jinki’s footsteps, the figure stopped and sprang up with a rock in hand, instantly on guard. It was her. When she saw Jinki, her mouth fell open in shock. She dropped the rock just as her knees hit the pavement, screaming in anguish. Jinki ran to her without a second thought, holding her close and whispering words of comfort as she cried into his chest. She couldn’t believe that he was alive. She was so sorry that she almost killed him. She wanted out. She wanted Jinki to help her change back. To help her see the light again.
“I’m so tired of the dark, Jinki. You don’t know what else resides there in the shadows. They’re scary.”
Jinki helped his friend stand up from the ground and had her lean on him as he walked. She must have been delusional from stress or drugs with the way she was talking and muttering to herself. If Jinki could bring her to Taemin, he knew the angel could cure her. He was about to have his best friend back. He had spent years fighting for his cause and fighting to save those he loved. Maybe things would turn out okay. Maybe his destiny would come true without his death.
His friend’s body started to become heavier and heavier. Jinki turned his head toward her to ask what was wrong when he saw her face trapped in a shocked expression. She convulsed and dropped to the ground, eyes rolling to the back of her head as she spasmed on the ground. Steam started rising from her body. Her eyes flashed yellow. Jinki yelled out her name. Something was not right. He looked up at the sound of guttural snarls only to find himself surrounded by several grotesque creatures. Their skin was grey and patchy, full of crusted blood and scars. Yellow eyes full of malice. Spindly wings popping and cracking with every movement. What were these things? They weren’t people, but they weren’t animals, either. The atmosphere around them was dark and suffocating. They looked at Jinki with twitching eyes and convoluted smiles.
Hands crawled up his back and wrapped around his neck for a second before they left. Jinki’s friend stepped around to face him. Though her body was normal, her eyes glowed yellow.
“Where’s the angel?” she questioned. Her voice was deeper than usual and carried screeching overtones that assaulted Jinki’s ears when he listened to it.
Nobody knew that Taemin was an angel. He never showed anyone else his wings. How did she know? Maybe it had something to do with the glow in her eyes.
“I-I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Don’t play dumb with me! I’m not who you think I am anymore.”
He had never stopped to think that if there were angels, there must be other things as well; other things that were the exact opposite of the goodness that radiated from beings like Taemin. Things like demons. The darkness that invaded the neighborhood wasn’t just darkness, but it was the darkness of Hell. And they were after Taemin. Not him, but Taemin.
“Please...tell me what’s happening...w-why are you acting so differently? Please come with me, I-I’ll help you!”
She just scoffed at his pleas. Her eyes turned to slits as she uttered a low growl. Her skin began to melt off of her face and body to reveal grey skin underneath. Jinki turned to run but barely took a few steps before he felt spindly fingers on his arm yanking him back. He fell to the ground with a grunt of pain. Claws scratched through his clothes onto his skin. Feet slammed into his side, causing a few of his ribs to crack. He screamed in agony. But with every kick, every punch, every scratch, the only thing that went through Jinki’s mind was Taemin.
So he screamed. He screamed Taemin’s name. It hurt his lungs worse than the kicks and punches, but he didn’t stop screaming. Screaming for him not to come. It’s a trap. It’s a trap. Taemin, it’s a trap. He prayed to the Heaven that Taemin came from to keep the angel away. Jinki would rather die than see anything happen to Taemin. To his angel. To his love.
Still, that bright light appeared. All the demons shrieked and covered their eyes from the brightness. Jinki painfully rose to his hands and knees, coughing up blood on the way. He could see that Taemin’s eyes were narrowed and that his nostrils flared in rage. He was poised and ready for a fight. Jinki screamed at him, telling him to leave. Telling him to go. Telling him that it’s not safe. The angel didn’t seem to hear him, though.
All of the demons turned to Taemin and attacked, leaving Jinki alone on the ground. He stood up as quickly as he could, all his bones and muscles protesting against the movement. But his heart wouldn’t let him stay still. Taemin. Taemin. Taemin. Was it his mind repeating that name over and over, or was it his ears that were hearing him scream it? He couldn’t tell. Jinki leaped onto the nearest demon, hands scratching at the moist, decrepit skin until he was easily flung off. This time, Jinki’s body wouldn’t let him get back up.
Taemin easily overpowered the demons that were attacking him, even though he was far outnumbered. He was completely focused on the battle. The screams from Jinki went unnoticed. No matter how much Jinki called out to him, the angel did not hear. It was only when Jinki was flung back to the ground that Taemin caught his eye. Jinki was saying something. Saying that he should leave. Saying that it’s a trap.
The ground suddenly shook beneath them. The air became hot and sulfuric. All the demons screeched and howled in ecstasy. Jinki saw realization dawn in Taemin’s eyes before they were overtaken by absolute horror. A sharp pain erupted in Jinki’s chest. When he looked down, he saw that a demon had stabbed him straight through the heart. Blood dripped from the wound and from Jinki’s mouth. He took one last look at Taemin. Reached out a shaky hand.
The angel cried out in grief, light bursting from his body. He fought through the demons surrounding him at an incredible rate, eyes never leaving Jinki’s. He lunged forward, wings propelling him. A desperate shout of Jinki’s name. An outstretched hand. Jinki felt himself being sucked into the ground, into the fiery depths below. He used the rest of his might to lean forward and reach for Taemin’s hand, even as he started to lose consciousness. He was almost there. Taemin’s hand was an inch from his grasp. Jinki closed his hand around...
...nothing. He fell down into the blackness, the last image being Taemin’s hand grasping at empty space.
My eyes fluttered open and then immediately crinkled shut. The air burned my eyes. I tried to take a deep breath but ended up coughing over the ash that filled my lungs. I forced my eyes to open despite the pain.
And looked into the eyes of the God of Hell.
It crinkled its already deformed face into one of even more disgust, letting out a quick scoff.
“Ugh, you reek. Love is so disgusting.”
Its grating voice shook my bones. My fingers tensed at the discomfort. I tried to move my feet and arms only to realize that there were demons holding on to all of my limbs. As I stood looking at their gnarled hands, the memories I just had came back to me full force. I gasped at their impact, heart suddenly pounding rapidly. I snapped my head back up to face the monster in front of me. My limbs twitched. My skin began to steam. My eyes reflected the fire of the devil’s garb, representing the burning hatred within my soul.
“Where’s Taemin?” I snapped. “What did you do to him?”
If the devil sent those demons, could he have also destroyed Taemin’s wings? What happened to Taemin after I disappeared? That monster killed my mom, destroyed my neighborhood, turned my best friend into a demon, and took Taemin away from me. What else was he capable of? I wasn’t just going to stand here and find out. I struggled violently against the demons’ hold. The effort was futile, though. I was still weak.
The monster chuckled.
“I see you remember. Who would have thought the curse had that kind of flaw...being around someone even remotely heavenly will weaken it. Oh well, it is all for the best now. I am so close to claiming an angel.”
I clenched my fists, nails digging into my palm.
“What are you going to do to him? Where is he?! Tell me right now!”
“Calm down, I do not have him. Yet. But thanks to you, I am so close. I will make Taemin a demon soon, and then I will have a way to enter Heaven and destroy it!”
The flames moved in a hellish dance as the devil roared with maniacal laughter. I struggled against the arms that held me down and, with a loud scream, was able to wrench myself from their grasp and sprint toward the God of Hell. I felt my bones crack and skin peel as I prepared to transform into my demon form. All rationale slipped away. I wanted to kill it. Kill the monster that wanted to hurt my Taemin.
“No! I won’t let you!”
“I would like to see you try. You are still my puppet, remember?”
With one look, I was stopped dead in my tracks. I couldn’t move no matter how much I struggled. Some invisible force had immobilized me. I looked up at the devil with all the fury I could muster, growling dangerously.
Instead of looking scared, it just cackled even more at my reaction.
“Oh, my Onew...soon, all Hell will break loose!”
And with that, it drew itself up to full height and shot out one of its arms toward me, swatting me away like a pesky fly. I was launched backwards by the force of the blow. It seemed like an eternity before my back slammed against solid ground.
Though when I sat up, I noticed that I didn’t land in Hell.
I was on Earth.
Surrounded by dead bodies.
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