Even though the moment passed me by, i still can't turn away
life's been crazy as of late. not necesarily crazy busy, just.. crazy. i've been loosing it and my mind one piece at a time for the past couple weeks. so i'm sorry to anyone i've made plans or promises to, i havn't been all here for the last month or two. or three or four. i just wish i'd loose it all, or get everything back. it's the lingering in the middle part that seems to be driving me mad.
i just seem to be at the point where, i've got the ones that i'm really close to, the people and things that i really care about and it seems to be enough. nothing else seems to really matter. not lunch with big groups of people i can't stand. not hanging out after school looking for some kind of a conversation. not doing annoying high school things during the weekend. just me. out to save the world, but sometimes not. trying to find some kind of peace in somebody, or nobody at all. it's been kinda nice being with myself and good friends that i really enjoy. going off alone at lunch was always something i was most scared of, or not comming down to talk to my friends at break. but keep finding myself doing it more and pushing everyone away, just doing my own thing. going to class early, or leaving a little late.
great people, can't stand them anymore.
i can't decide wither i'm either at one of the lowest places i've ever been, or one of the highest. it's a hell of a lot more honest, i'll tell you that. everyone just seems like little kids. with high school drama that everyone creates for themselves. meeting in their predictable spots in the commons, screaming around in little cliquie circles like they always have, and probably always will. i guess i'm just trying to grow up in my own little way, and no one seems to want to follow where i'm going. wherever that is. and i can't really promise to be back either.
summer came early this year, and i've been housesitting with my friend for the past couple days. it's a great place that came just in time. there's not a whole lot to do there except yoga, or read, or soak in the tub. it's just so peaceful, and nice to be there. i need to get some more tea and perhaps some bread. but i think i might stay there for a while longer, hopefully another week or so.
i love it when it rains, i really do.
i just seem to be at the point where, i've got the ones that i'm really close to, the people and things that i really care about and it seems to be enough. nothing else seems to really matter. not lunch with big groups of people i can't stand. not hanging out after school looking for some kind of a conversation. not doing annoying high school things during the weekend. just me. out to save the world, but sometimes not. trying to find some kind of peace in somebody, or nobody at all. it's been kinda nice being with myself and good friends that i really enjoy. going off alone at lunch was always something i was most scared of, or not comming down to talk to my friends at break. but keep finding myself doing it more and pushing everyone away, just doing my own thing. going to class early, or leaving a little late.
great people, can't stand them anymore.
i can't decide wither i'm either at one of the lowest places i've ever been, or one of the highest. it's a hell of a lot more honest, i'll tell you that. everyone just seems like little kids. with high school drama that everyone creates for themselves. meeting in their predictable spots in the commons, screaming around in little cliquie circles like they always have, and probably always will. i guess i'm just trying to grow up in my own little way, and no one seems to want to follow where i'm going. wherever that is. and i can't really promise to be back either.
summer came early this year, and i've been housesitting with my friend for the past couple days. it's a great place that came just in time. there's not a whole lot to do there except yoga, or read, or soak in the tub. it's just so peaceful, and nice to be there. i need to get some more tea and perhaps some bread. but i think i might stay there for a while longer, hopefully another week or so.
i love it when it rains, i really do.