the law of attraction
i realized something today. I know where my son gets it. when he was little, if you took him to the fair or the beach or to a party, the more fun he had, the worse he would feel when it was time to go home. The stoppage of the fun would overwhelm him so totally that it would ruin his memory of the entire experience. when he fell in love with our terrier, and then she had to go to the vet the next day with a life-threatening illness, his fear of her death was so strong that he couldn't play with her when she got well and came home. She wasn't "his dog" any more. And he missed a lot of the rest of the relationship before he could cope again.
But I'm no longer a child. At some point while I wasn't looking, I got older than 14. I don't have to be afraid I will never have any fun again. and today I remembered to be grateful. grateful for the loves that I have had. the joy they've given me. the experiences, the laughing, the sex, the fun. The adventure, the sense of possibility, the chance for growth. The pure intensity of feeling. Suddenly once again I could spout paeans of praise for each of them. Each of you. You know who you are.
We give each other flowers BECAUSE they die. To remind us. Life is transient. We live in time. Carpe diem, gather ye roses while ye may, etc, etc.
No wonder I am so fond of rosebushes. They just keep making more roses. Of course, me being me, I'm fondest of the giant castle-eating climbers that you couldn't kill with a barrel of Round-up and a chainsaw.
But I'm no longer a child. At some point while I wasn't looking, I got older than 14. I don't have to be afraid I will never have any fun again. and today I remembered to be grateful. grateful for the loves that I have had. the joy they've given me. the experiences, the laughing, the sex, the fun. The adventure, the sense of possibility, the chance for growth. The pure intensity of feeling. Suddenly once again I could spout paeans of praise for each of them. Each of you. You know who you are.
We give each other flowers BECAUSE they die. To remind us. Life is transient. We live in time. Carpe diem, gather ye roses while ye may, etc, etc.
No wonder I am so fond of rosebushes. They just keep making more roses. Of course, me being me, I'm fondest of the giant castle-eating climbers that you couldn't kill with a barrel of Round-up and a chainsaw.