(no subject)
Alright...so things didn't work out with anyone and their dates to go to Hawaii, so I won't be leaving or I would've already been gone. So new dates are on Monday October 25-30 or November 7-21. The thing is that my Anties funeral is on the 29th and the viewing starts at 10am-3pm and the burial is at 3pm. I have to be back for Halloween because I already have plans. Then on top of that the Avril concert is November 9th. (Becky I'll get you your money for that ticket as soon as I can:)) So I really don't know what I'm going to do. Go Monday and spend the whole time in Maui and a few hours with Jasmine and come back on Saturday...or go November 7th and stay for 2 weeks, miss Curves, miss the concert, spend evenly amount of time with family on Maui and Honolulu...I don't know yet.
I'm very emotional right now with a lot of things. That sometimes I can come across as happy, pissed, sad, that it even confuses me at times, yet I know what I'm going through so I understand it. A big part of me just wants to cry, but the other part of me is saying not to and it's not letting me. I just got the snot thing going on.
I want to be by myself this weekend like it's supposed to be. Doris and Clarence are leaving Saturday morning around 8am for their trip to Nebraska and Doris won't be back til Wednesday and Clarence won't be back til Friday or Saturday. Corey left this morning to go to class, if he goes, and then head to Tech. He doesn't have to stay the whole weekend but he is choosing to/ He won't be back here til Sunday afternoon is what I'm banking on. So it's just me and Ayden here. I kinda like it that way but 9 out of 10 my mom will come over and I will probably ask Amber to come over if she gets a chance. I don't know. I really kinda want to be by myself with Ayden but at the same time I love company, especially when they take my mind off of everything that I've been thinking about. Almost like it doesn't get mentioned but if it does it's a very short topic, I like it like that. That way I don't feel like I HAVE to talk about it, but when I am ready to.
So I don't really know what this weekend holds for me, and I guess it's okay. I really need to make my mind up about Hawaii, SOON, so I can start making the plans that need to be made and stuff like that.
But, I have other things to say, but I think that everything is too raw right now to talk about it, so I will talk about it later, through here, in person, to myself, to my mom, someway I will talk about it.
*random thought: Avril's songs
so everyone try to have a good day and I'll catch up with you guys soon...
I'm very emotional right now with a lot of things. That sometimes I can come across as happy, pissed, sad, that it even confuses me at times, yet I know what I'm going through so I understand it. A big part of me just wants to cry, but the other part of me is saying not to and it's not letting me. I just got the snot thing going on.
I want to be by myself this weekend like it's supposed to be. Doris and Clarence are leaving Saturday morning around 8am for their trip to Nebraska and Doris won't be back til Wednesday and Clarence won't be back til Friday or Saturday. Corey left this morning to go to class, if he goes, and then head to Tech. He doesn't have to stay the whole weekend but he is choosing to/ He won't be back here til Sunday afternoon is what I'm banking on. So it's just me and Ayden here. I kinda like it that way but 9 out of 10 my mom will come over and I will probably ask Amber to come over if she gets a chance. I don't know. I really kinda want to be by myself with Ayden but at the same time I love company, especially when they take my mind off of everything that I've been thinking about. Almost like it doesn't get mentioned but if it does it's a very short topic, I like it like that. That way I don't feel like I HAVE to talk about it, but when I am ready to.
So I don't really know what this weekend holds for me, and I guess it's okay. I really need to make my mind up about Hawaii, SOON, so I can start making the plans that need to be made and stuff like that.
But, I have other things to say, but I think that everything is too raw right now to talk about it, so I will talk about it later, through here, in person, to myself, to my mom, someway I will talk about it.
*random thought: Avril's songs
so everyone try to have a good day and I'll catch up with you guys soon...