Mr. Real vs. Mr. Right
I was listening to public talk radio this morning, and there was a woman talking about relationships. Women in their 20's, 30's, and 40's, and how we should perhaps settle for reality instead of holding out for fireworks.
This seems to me a very cynical and jaded thing to say. Why on earth should we just settle for what would be simply ok in the long term when we could be finding what would be phenomenal day after day after day?!
The woman went on to talk about how men were incredibly supportive of this Settling Theory, but it was the women in their 20's who balked. Does this come from 20 something ladies wanting more, expecting more from their lives, their hair, their men? Or does cynicism come from years of disappointment where the other gender is concerned.
Women called in to say how they married at such and such age, not really loving their husbands, but after years of marital "okay', they discovered the groom was their soulmate. So much time spent in mediocrity seems to me to be somewhat blinding, or somehow distorting their vision. Are they comfortable in what they have, and can't imagine anything better?
Are so many women stuck in mediocrity donning rose colored glasses?
Somewhere in my head I think that lack of imagination fuels this conformation to the passable. Cheesy romantic movies fill our heads when we're young to hold out for extreme grand gestures and sensitivity to the point where one of these men come along and seem unreal! Disney movies and romantic dramedys push prose to the point of ludicrous fantasy. The 'real world' holds none of these illusions. What it does hold are alternatives. Very few men are going to stand out in the rain holding a boom box till you come down. Very few men are going to fly to Paris and attempt to knock out the ex-Russian lover.
What they are going to do is play you a song on their ipod, without telling you it's for you. They will kiss you at the stop lights till you hear the honk meaning "GET THE HELL OUT OF MY WAY THE LIGHT IS GREEN!". They will drive 3 hours on a whim, just to see you.
Romance has evolved, some say for the worse, some say for the better. All I say is that women cannot settle. We cannot just say "He'll do, I guess." Find what makes you smile when you just think it's name. Find butterflies. Find fireworks. True love exists, no matter your age, status, or situation. Don't just settle for reality, let love find you! Embrace it, don't view it with the modern contemptuous eye. Let romance happen, instead of giggling in disbelief.
Love is out there, it's time we took off our reality blinders and let a little imagination into our lives.
This seems to me a very cynical and jaded thing to say. Why on earth should we just settle for what would be simply ok in the long term when we could be finding what would be phenomenal day after day after day?!
The woman went on to talk about how men were incredibly supportive of this Settling Theory, but it was the women in their 20's who balked. Does this come from 20 something ladies wanting more, expecting more from their lives, their hair, their men? Or does cynicism come from years of disappointment where the other gender is concerned.
Women called in to say how they married at such and such age, not really loving their husbands, but after years of marital "okay', they discovered the groom was their soulmate. So much time spent in mediocrity seems to me to be somewhat blinding, or somehow distorting their vision. Are they comfortable in what they have, and can't imagine anything better?
Are so many women stuck in mediocrity donning rose colored glasses?
Somewhere in my head I think that lack of imagination fuels this conformation to the passable. Cheesy romantic movies fill our heads when we're young to hold out for extreme grand gestures and sensitivity to the point where one of these men come along and seem unreal! Disney movies and romantic dramedys push prose to the point of ludicrous fantasy. The 'real world' holds none of these illusions. What it does hold are alternatives. Very few men are going to stand out in the rain holding a boom box till you come down. Very few men are going to fly to Paris and attempt to knock out the ex-Russian lover.
What they are going to do is play you a song on their ipod, without telling you it's for you. They will kiss you at the stop lights till you hear the honk meaning "GET THE HELL OUT OF MY WAY THE LIGHT IS GREEN!". They will drive 3 hours on a whim, just to see you.
Romance has evolved, some say for the worse, some say for the better. All I say is that women cannot settle. We cannot just say "He'll do, I guess." Find what makes you smile when you just think it's name. Find butterflies. Find fireworks. True love exists, no matter your age, status, or situation. Don't just settle for reality, let love find you! Embrace it, don't view it with the modern contemptuous eye. Let romance happen, instead of giggling in disbelief.
Love is out there, it's time we took off our reality blinders and let a little imagination into our lives.