Fandom Cookies '09
Leah, I know you wanted to do them again, but I am bored and wanted to do them myself. So there.
:-D
One day, Arthur and Merlin are skipping around Camelot holding hands. Because while Camelot is strictly against the use of magic, it has no hard and fast rules about buggering your manservant.
The Slash Dragons likes to watch.
When suddenly, Edward Cullen the sparkly vampire appears out of nowhere, as is his want. The Slash Dragon decides to investigate.
"As if you could outrun me!" Edward says, hurling a random portal at the Slash Dragon. The Slash Dragon remains mildly amused.
When all of a sudden, the portal starts to Vorp!, and should appear, but girl investigator Sally Sparrow! Merlin is instantly nervous, as hot chicks appearing in Camelot usually lead to him getting beaten up/heartbroken/both.
The portal continues to do its job, and the next person to hurtle through the portal in none other than The Doctor!
"Incoming!" shouts the Doctor as he lands on Sally Sparrow's head. Merlin and Arthur decide to stand back, and this is clearly some kind of evil saucery.
The next person through the portal is the Master, who joins in on the Sally-Doctor dogpile.
"Doctor! What are you doing here? And why are you wearing an apron?"
"I was making dinner..."
The Master looks smug.
"So, when is dinner going to be ready?"
"Master, we DID just fall through a random portal. Dinner might be on hold for the time being."
The Slash Dragon senses incoming slash and decides to creep.
Meanwhile, Edward hones in on the only woman in the room, and starts to make his moves.
"You're my... only reason... to stay alive... if that's what I am..."
Because she is a realistic and well-rounded female character, Sally in instantly weirded out.
"As if you could outrun me!"
Apparently Edward trying to throw portals at people really sets them off, as soon a new person falls through. Who else could it be, but Old Gregg!
"Hi, Lady. I'm Old Gregg, pleased to meetcha. I'm looking for my true love, Howard Moon."
Edward is confused as to Old Gregg's gender, but goes for it anyway.
"I'm sorry, I'm just... I'm just trying to figure you out."
The Slash Dragon is instantly interested.
Meanwhile, Morgan and Gwen were doing... absolutely nothing untoward in Morgana's chambers, when they hear a commosion in the courtyard, and decide to investigate.
And promptly leave again.
Next Dr. Horrible falls through the random portal.
Being the badass, post-series Dr. Horrible, he immediately sees an opportunity to reek some havoc, and decides to ride the Slash Dragon into some medieval mayhem. "I bet you didn't see that coming, Merlin!"
Luckily(?) Captain Hammer falls through shortly afterwards.
As does Gene Hunt. They form an instant bond.
"You see, the best thing to do with hard-hearted villains, is give them the fist of doom!"
"Oi, Tyler! Mind if I give this bloke your job!"
The Doctor sees Sam Tyler come through and is instantly confused.
"Master... but weren't you just... why are you... flares?... and... wait, Tyler?... I..."
While the Doctor is distracted, Dr. Horrible, the Master, Old Gregg, and the Slash Dragon decide to form a villain club. Edward is feeling left out and wants to join in. Or is still trying to hit on Old Gregg. "I feel very... protective of you..."
Sam, Gene, and Captain Hammer team up to take them down... seventies style.
While the Doctor is examining the random portal, who should fall through but Donghae from Korean boy band Super Junior.
With Donghae's help, the Doctor manages to reverse the portal, which starts sucking people back in, starting with Dr. Horrible.
"There can be only one Doctor here in this medieval castle!"
Death dressed as the Hogfather senses some disturbances in the fabric of the cosmos and decides to find out what's going on.
"Erm, Merlin? Is that a Skeleton looking at us?"
"As if you could outrun me!"
Unfortunately the Slash Dragon is the next victim.
"But wait, I live here! Tell Merlin that Arthur is his one true loooooooooooove..."
Death really likes Sally Sparrow, apparently.
Since Howard is nowhere in sight, Old Gregg decides to make a move on the next hottest man in the room.
"Hey Arthur. Your hair is like beautiful rays of sunshine in the night. I'm Old Gregg."
Using his manly strength, Arthur kicks Old Gregg back through the portal.
"I'M OLD GREEEEEEEEEEEEEGG!"
Then Gene jumps in the air and hits Sam on the head apparently for some reason.
Donghae comes over to Merlin to discuss hairstyles.
"So you just put a bowl on your head and cut around it? Cool idea!"
The Master instantly senses a great opportunity for mischief.
"It's great to see you again, Sally! It seems like every time I loose my TARDIS, there you are!"
"You lost your TARDIS again?"
"Weeeell... yeah. I'm sort of stuck with the Master in 1950s America. I've been doing a LOT of baking."
"Oh Doctor! I found a Korean boy! We're taking him home with us!"
The Doctor facepalms.
Luckily Donghae is so skinny that he manages to slip through the Master's grasp, and back through the portal. In all the excitement, Sally is pulled in as well.
"I'll probably see you again soon, Doctor!"
"Come on, Doctor. Let's go home."
"Actually..." The Doctor sidles over, "I think I'm going to stay with the equally hot but not evil version of you. Sorry, Master. I just feel that with Sam I'm less likely to be killed any second."
"No poofters!" Gene says, and grabbing Sam by the head takes them both back to... wherever they came from.
"Sooooo," Says the Master, "Can we go back home and have sex now?"
The Doctor sighs.
"Weeeell. I didn't have any other plans for the evening."
...
PUNT!
"Harsh."
Edward decides to take revenge my kidnapping Merlin.
"Oh, you messed with the wrong medieval Prince."
Arthur... wins somehow. Cuddles!
The Doctor and Master head home to their somewhat weird but endearing living situation.
"We're having lasagna tonight, by the way."
"Well... that was weird."
"Oooh, free sword!"
"As if you could outrun me!!!!!!!"
THE END
All of the references to the Doctor and Master living in the 50s is in reference to cws_eat_chs's FABULOUS Doctor/Master 50s AU masterpiece. Check it out here
For those of your interested in past years' cookie tomfoolery, here are the links for
Cookies '07"
Cookies '08"
:-D
One day, Arthur and Merlin are skipping around Camelot holding hands. Because while Camelot is strictly against the use of magic, it has no hard and fast rules about buggering your manservant.
The Slash Dragons likes to watch.
When suddenly, Edward Cullen the sparkly vampire appears out of nowhere, as is his want. The Slash Dragon decides to investigate.
"As if you could outrun me!" Edward says, hurling a random portal at the Slash Dragon. The Slash Dragon remains mildly amused.
When all of a sudden, the portal starts to Vorp!, and should appear, but girl investigator Sally Sparrow! Merlin is instantly nervous, as hot chicks appearing in Camelot usually lead to him getting beaten up/heartbroken/both.
The portal continues to do its job, and the next person to hurtle through the portal in none other than The Doctor!
"Incoming!" shouts the Doctor as he lands on Sally Sparrow's head. Merlin and Arthur decide to stand back, and this is clearly some kind of evil saucery.
The next person through the portal is the Master, who joins in on the Sally-Doctor dogpile.
"Doctor! What are you doing here? And why are you wearing an apron?"
"I was making dinner..."
The Master looks smug.
"So, when is dinner going to be ready?"
"Master, we DID just fall through a random portal. Dinner might be on hold for the time being."
The Slash Dragon senses incoming slash and decides to creep.
Meanwhile, Edward hones in on the only woman in the room, and starts to make his moves.
"You're my... only reason... to stay alive... if that's what I am..."
Because she is a realistic and well-rounded female character, Sally in instantly weirded out.
"As if you could outrun me!"
Apparently Edward trying to throw portals at people really sets them off, as soon a new person falls through. Who else could it be, but Old Gregg!
"Hi, Lady. I'm Old Gregg, pleased to meetcha. I'm looking for my true love, Howard Moon."
Edward is confused as to Old Gregg's gender, but goes for it anyway.
"I'm sorry, I'm just... I'm just trying to figure you out."
The Slash Dragon is instantly interested.
Meanwhile, Morgan and Gwen were doing... absolutely nothing untoward in Morgana's chambers, when they hear a commosion in the courtyard, and decide to investigate.
And promptly leave again.
Next Dr. Horrible falls through the random portal.
Being the badass, post-series Dr. Horrible, he immediately sees an opportunity to reek some havoc, and decides to ride the Slash Dragon into some medieval mayhem. "I bet you didn't see that coming, Merlin!"
Luckily(?) Captain Hammer falls through shortly afterwards.
As does Gene Hunt. They form an instant bond.
"You see, the best thing to do with hard-hearted villains, is give them the fist of doom!"
"Oi, Tyler! Mind if I give this bloke your job!"
The Doctor sees Sam Tyler come through and is instantly confused.
"Master... but weren't you just... why are you... flares?... and... wait, Tyler?... I..."
While the Doctor is distracted, Dr. Horrible, the Master, Old Gregg, and the Slash Dragon decide to form a villain club. Edward is feeling left out and wants to join in. Or is still trying to hit on Old Gregg. "I feel very... protective of you..."
Sam, Gene, and Captain Hammer team up to take them down... seventies style.
While the Doctor is examining the random portal, who should fall through but Donghae from Korean boy band Super Junior.
With Donghae's help, the Doctor manages to reverse the portal, which starts sucking people back in, starting with Dr. Horrible.
"There can be only one Doctor here in this medieval castle!"
Death dressed as the Hogfather senses some disturbances in the fabric of the cosmos and decides to find out what's going on.
"Erm, Merlin? Is that a Skeleton looking at us?"
"As if you could outrun me!"
Unfortunately the Slash Dragon is the next victim.
"But wait, I live here! Tell Merlin that Arthur is his one true loooooooooooove..."
Death really likes Sally Sparrow, apparently.
Since Howard is nowhere in sight, Old Gregg decides to make a move on the next hottest man in the room.
"Hey Arthur. Your hair is like beautiful rays of sunshine in the night. I'm Old Gregg."
Using his manly strength, Arthur kicks Old Gregg back through the portal.
"I'M OLD GREEEEEEEEEEEEEGG!"
Then Gene jumps in the air and hits Sam on the head apparently for some reason.
Donghae comes over to Merlin to discuss hairstyles.
"So you just put a bowl on your head and cut around it? Cool idea!"
The Master instantly senses a great opportunity for mischief.
"It's great to see you again, Sally! It seems like every time I loose my TARDIS, there you are!"
"You lost your TARDIS again?"
"Weeeell... yeah. I'm sort of stuck with the Master in 1950s America. I've been doing a LOT of baking."
"Oh Doctor! I found a Korean boy! We're taking him home with us!"
The Doctor facepalms.
Luckily Donghae is so skinny that he manages to slip through the Master's grasp, and back through the portal. In all the excitement, Sally is pulled in as well.
"I'll probably see you again soon, Doctor!"
"Come on, Doctor. Let's go home."
"Actually..." The Doctor sidles over, "I think I'm going to stay with the equally hot but not evil version of you. Sorry, Master. I just feel that with Sam I'm less likely to be killed any second."
"No poofters!" Gene says, and grabbing Sam by the head takes them both back to... wherever they came from.
"Sooooo," Says the Master, "Can we go back home and have sex now?"
The Doctor sighs.
"Weeeell. I didn't have any other plans for the evening."
...
PUNT!
"Harsh."
Edward decides to take revenge my kidnapping Merlin.
"Oh, you messed with the wrong medieval Prince."
Arthur... wins somehow. Cuddles!
The Doctor and Master head home to their somewhat weird but endearing living situation.
"We're having lasagna tonight, by the way."
"Well... that was weird."
"Oooh, free sword!"
"As if you could outrun me!!!!!!!"
THE END
All of the references to the Doctor and Master living in the 50s is in reference to cws_eat_chs's FABULOUS Doctor/Master 50s AU masterpiece. Check it out here
For those of your interested in past years' cookie tomfoolery, here are the links for
Cookies '07"
Cookies '08"