some moments are ment to be more real than others...even if it is only something in the air.
Life is so fucking beautiful. People are so fucking beautiful...... They are crazy, and cruel, and loving, and gracious, and even contagious....... but that makes them all the more beautiful. I have been so happy today. Its a pure feeling. I love everyone..... I know, it sounds cheesey, but today I really do. Maybe its something in the air. Just go outside tonight and breath it in, take off your coat and let it blow across your skin. Warm but with the slightest sent of fall, its all I really need right now. I stood tonight in the kroger parking lot, looked up at the dark sky, and let the smallest drops of water fall on my face. They soaked into my skin, becoming a part of me. Suddenly I was free to breath. I thought about the past few months, no longer with regert, but instead with pride that I survived and came out on the other end. And I realized that they only made me stronger, and free to love deeper, and able to feel things with a sense of unconditionality. Im not over anything, ive just absorbed it all, turned it to dust and let it get caught up in this dry night breeze. Everything is going to be ok.....
Last night I played a game of phone tag that was never resolved. It wasnt ment to be resolved. I fell asleep, phone in hand, dreaming that the person on the unanswered end of the phone was sleeping next to me. and thats all that it was, we just slept, no kisses, no fights, not even one thought of sex. The best part was how real it seemed, like he was there next to me before I even entered my dream.... like even though we were in two different beds miles apart we were still sleeping next to eachother. Maybe he felt the same way, I would like to think so. The best part is that I know if he would have actually come over it would not have been so perfect. We need that distance to feel secure..... I dont ever want to go back, I want to move ahead. And I dont ever want to lose him. last night and today I know we have a future together.....I will always love him most.... who knows, maybe its just something in the air.
Last night I played a game of phone tag that was never resolved. It wasnt ment to be resolved. I fell asleep, phone in hand, dreaming that the person on the unanswered end of the phone was sleeping next to me. and thats all that it was, we just slept, no kisses, no fights, not even one thought of sex. The best part was how real it seemed, like he was there next to me before I even entered my dream.... like even though we were in two different beds miles apart we were still sleeping next to eachother. Maybe he felt the same way, I would like to think so. The best part is that I know if he would have actually come over it would not have been so perfect. We need that distance to feel secure..... I dont ever want to go back, I want to move ahead. And I dont ever want to lose him. last night and today I know we have a future together.....I will always love him most.... who knows, maybe its just something in the air.