rant against romance
more updating to combat the boredom...
I'd like to make an argument that concept of romance/love is the same thing as stupidity. This is really an internal argument inside my head since I'm arguing against my conception of romance/love. The point of this, really, is not that romance/love doesn't exist, but that my conception of it doesn't exist and hence I need to redefine it. Also, because my conception is very fairy-tale-ish, I've kept these examples very heteronormative.
First of all anything that is romantic is considered so because someone took a chance and got lucky. Example: You recieve a boquet of flowers from your crush on valentines day. (*swoon*) I think part of my concept of romance is fucked up because its so female-centric... think of that poor guy! How the hell did he know that you were going to like the flowers? Thats one hell of a risk! So while she's swooning, that poor guys is getting over one huge case of the nerves.
Secondly, romance involves something happening that is exactly what you were dreaming of, and somehow the other person gets it just right. Example: You recieve a boquet of flowers from 'your secret admirer' on valentines day. Now, if 'your secret admirer' turns out to be your crush, then we're back to example #1. Of course its far more common for 'your secret admirer' to be someone you don't like, or, even worse, that creepy guy who keeps following you around. So basically, any guy could send any girl flowers and the difference between the flowers being percieved as creepy or romantic is all up to the reciever. this seems fickel to me; I could be wrong.
Thirdly, romance involves this concept of two people falling in love and being perfectly insync with each other. i.e. crush like you! you like crush! oh happily ever after!!! ...problem: the chances of you and crush being on exactly the same plane, exactly the same ammount of 'like', are really low. In fact (as my esteemed ana pointed out to me recently) her ammount of like has nothing to do with his ammount of like. These are independent variables people! If an action occurs, the motivation is rarely taken into account (especially in any in-depth way) and the reaction to the action is based soley on the action and the reactor's feelings about the action.
I hope no one finds me horribly stupid for not having worked all this out a long time ago. I still need to construct a new conception of romance. I think I need to incorporate masculine and queer perspectives.
So, in conclusion, I hope I have ruined every fairy tale you've ever heard, cause none of them are possible. Why the hell to we tell our kids these stupid stories where all your problems are solved by a prince appearing, and where people have these mysterious romantic feelings that no one in real life can ever actually have? We fuck our kids up so bad without even realizing it. Our whole culture is so fucked up. Because, if you didn't grow up knowing these stories then you are considered an outsiders and a freak. Humans are so broken!.
to end this rant I would like to quote Ernest Cline regarding humans:
"they're the only animals that think they're supposed to be happy, all of the other animals can just be"
(the quote appears in the movie accessible here)
I'd like to make an argument that concept of romance/love is the same thing as stupidity. This is really an internal argument inside my head since I'm arguing against my conception of romance/love. The point of this, really, is not that romance/love doesn't exist, but that my conception of it doesn't exist and hence I need to redefine it. Also, because my conception is very fairy-tale-ish, I've kept these examples very heteronormative.
First of all anything that is romantic is considered so because someone took a chance and got lucky. Example: You recieve a boquet of flowers from your crush on valentines day. (*swoon*) I think part of my concept of romance is fucked up because its so female-centric... think of that poor guy! How the hell did he know that you were going to like the flowers? Thats one hell of a risk! So while she's swooning, that poor guys is getting over one huge case of the nerves.
Secondly, romance involves something happening that is exactly what you were dreaming of, and somehow the other person gets it just right. Example: You recieve a boquet of flowers from 'your secret admirer' on valentines day. Now, if 'your secret admirer' turns out to be your crush, then we're back to example #1. Of course its far more common for 'your secret admirer' to be someone you don't like, or, even worse, that creepy guy who keeps following you around. So basically, any guy could send any girl flowers and the difference between the flowers being percieved as creepy or romantic is all up to the reciever. this seems fickel to me; I could be wrong.
Thirdly, romance involves this concept of two people falling in love and being perfectly insync with each other. i.e. crush like you! you like crush! oh happily ever after!!! ...problem: the chances of you and crush being on exactly the same plane, exactly the same ammount of 'like', are really low. In fact (as my esteemed ana pointed out to me recently) her ammount of like has nothing to do with his ammount of like. These are independent variables people! If an action occurs, the motivation is rarely taken into account (especially in any in-depth way) and the reaction to the action is based soley on the action and the reactor's feelings about the action.
I hope no one finds me horribly stupid for not having worked all this out a long time ago. I still need to construct a new conception of romance. I think I need to incorporate masculine and queer perspectives.
So, in conclusion, I hope I have ruined every fairy tale you've ever heard, cause none of them are possible. Why the hell to we tell our kids these stupid stories where all your problems are solved by a prince appearing, and where people have these mysterious romantic feelings that no one in real life can ever actually have? We fuck our kids up so bad without even realizing it. Our whole culture is so fucked up. Because, if you didn't grow up knowing these stories then you are considered an outsiders and a freak. Humans are so broken!.
to end this rant I would like to quote Ernest Cline regarding humans:
"they're the only animals that think they're supposed to be happy, all of the other animals can just be"
(the quote appears in the movie accessible here)