A disturbing awakening
So I was in Kansas this weekend. That was really nice. It was really nice to get away for a few days. But it was really overwhelming. it was my first college trip, and so the whole college experience was really intense for me. Yeah we partied, but there is a whole part of college that I know I am not ready for. Kansas was beautiful, and for some reason I don't get into Brandeis or American, I can definitely see myself there.
I had a disturbing awakening last night. After getting into a fight with a friend, I realized how much I truly have changed. I guess I never thought of what the real consequences would be for leaving for 6 months. Yeah, I have really changed a lot and I didn't know that there would be a punishment for that. I mean, why is it so hard now to fit in with my friends? Why is it so difficult for me to relate to my peers in school? Sometimes I feel all alone, just because I know that I am different. I'm different because I have experienced so much in my life so far that not many people my age have experienced. I have a different perspective on life because of everything that I saw with my very own two eyes. It's so hard because all I want is to fit in, and for some reason I feel that I can't fit in at my school because I don't have anything in common with anybody. I sometimes feel like an outcast. And that was why I was so thankful for the few really great friends I do have in school. I thought my friends at school supported me and were there for me. They understood that I am not like everybody else, and that I'm different. They understand and support my beliefs, my lifestyle and my interests. I just had a distrubing awakening...that there is soooo many things I need to work on before I go to college. I realized how much I do want to Brandeis more than anything, because I feel like I am able to find more people like ME that have the same perspective and outlook. I want to find friends that have the same interests and understand why I don't mind sitting home on a Saturday night and just hang out. I Just want to be accepted and I just want to find people in my life that really will support me. I had a disturbing awakening...that for some reason I was punished for growing up, for maturing, and for truly being happy with the person I am, and for having the time of my life in Israel. It's really sad. I'm sad. I hope that somehow my life can get a bit more perky, because right now, I just feel alone.
I had a disturbing awakening last night. After getting into a fight with a friend, I realized how much I truly have changed. I guess I never thought of what the real consequences would be for leaving for 6 months. Yeah, I have really changed a lot and I didn't know that there would be a punishment for that. I mean, why is it so hard now to fit in with my friends? Why is it so difficult for me to relate to my peers in school? Sometimes I feel all alone, just because I know that I am different. I'm different because I have experienced so much in my life so far that not many people my age have experienced. I have a different perspective on life because of everything that I saw with my very own two eyes. It's so hard because all I want is to fit in, and for some reason I feel that I can't fit in at my school because I don't have anything in common with anybody. I sometimes feel like an outcast. And that was why I was so thankful for the few really great friends I do have in school. I thought my friends at school supported me and were there for me. They understood that I am not like everybody else, and that I'm different. They understand and support my beliefs, my lifestyle and my interests. I just had a distrubing awakening...that there is soooo many things I need to work on before I go to college. I realized how much I do want to Brandeis more than anything, because I feel like I am able to find more people like ME that have the same perspective and outlook. I want to find friends that have the same interests and understand why I don't mind sitting home on a Saturday night and just hang out. I Just want to be accepted and I just want to find people in my life that really will support me. I had a disturbing awakening...that for some reason I was punished for growing up, for maturing, and for truly being happy with the person I am, and for having the time of my life in Israel. It's really sad. I'm sad. I hope that somehow my life can get a bit more perky, because right now, I just feel alone.