Where can I find a trusting friend?? ..."Aisle 5"
So this morning I started having this horrible pain in the right side of my face. So throughout the day, my sinuses have been killing me. Everytime I breathe in through my right nostril, a shooting pain is shot out to my right cheek bone. And all day I have had a splitting headache on the right side. It sucks not feeling well.
So I came home and watched 5 episodes of Sex and the City: 3rd season. I wish life was like Sex and the City sometimes. No major responsibilities, hardly any work. All we need to worry about is finding life mates, having lots of sex, and making sure that your outfit is perfect with the perfect 500 dollar pair of shoes you just bought.
I'm not sure whether its all the medication I am on that is allowing me to have these certain thoughts, but I have just been feeling very doubtful. Of everybody. I feel like now, more than ever, I am having the hardest time finding people that I can talk to. There's so many things I just want to say right now, and I just can't find anybody I can truly talk to about it. I realized how much people are in their own worlds. People are really self absorbed. yeah I am too, but I know that if it was necessary, I will be there for somebody in a heartbeat.
People are just very judgemental, and I feel that with certain people, they will just judge my actions, my thoughts, and everything. It's like some people in my life just don't really care, and I just feel like I haven't received enough feedback that I know that I am able to trust them and talk to them.
I'm feeling so many feelings. And for some reason, I just feel so alone within my own thoughts swarming around me. Why does it seem like nobody cares about anything but themselves? But then I remember what I have been told many times, "Don't trust anybody." and "You are your first priority. Only care about yourself." And as I think about it at this moment, I don't really trust anybody right now.
It's upsetting, lonely, and makes one's self esteem seem to decline so much. I am starting to feel that frog in the back of my throat. The feeling you have right before that first tear falls down your cheek.
Why are people just so mean? Why are they so judgemental, critical, and self absorbed? What happened to having "friends" that will always be there for you? And friends that won't tell other people secrets that you told them not to tell? Where are those friend where you are able to tell your innner most secrets to?
Why is "trust" so hard to find?
So I came home and watched 5 episodes of Sex and the City: 3rd season. I wish life was like Sex and the City sometimes. No major responsibilities, hardly any work. All we need to worry about is finding life mates, having lots of sex, and making sure that your outfit is perfect with the perfect 500 dollar pair of shoes you just bought.
I'm not sure whether its all the medication I am on that is allowing me to have these certain thoughts, but I have just been feeling very doubtful. Of everybody. I feel like now, more than ever, I am having the hardest time finding people that I can talk to. There's so many things I just want to say right now, and I just can't find anybody I can truly talk to about it. I realized how much people are in their own worlds. People are really self absorbed. yeah I am too, but I know that if it was necessary, I will be there for somebody in a heartbeat.
People are just very judgemental, and I feel that with certain people, they will just judge my actions, my thoughts, and everything. It's like some people in my life just don't really care, and I just feel like I haven't received enough feedback that I know that I am able to trust them and talk to them.
I'm feeling so many feelings. And for some reason, I just feel so alone within my own thoughts swarming around me. Why does it seem like nobody cares about anything but themselves? But then I remember what I have been told many times, "Don't trust anybody." and "You are your first priority. Only care about yourself." And as I think about it at this moment, I don't really trust anybody right now.
It's upsetting, lonely, and makes one's self esteem seem to decline so much. I am starting to feel that frog in the back of my throat. The feeling you have right before that first tear falls down your cheek.
Why are people just so mean? Why are they so judgemental, critical, and self absorbed? What happened to having "friends" that will always be there for you? And friends that won't tell other people secrets that you told them not to tell? Where are those friend where you are able to tell your innner most secrets to?
Why is "trust" so hard to find?