Time to Contemplate
I'll be turning 26 this year. I've been working for the Home Depot since I was 19. Ever since I started working as a lowly cashier at this place people have always told me I would go places. My supervisors, my coworkers... even some customers. I used to take this as kind words or conversation. In my time I've made it from $9.00 to at least $25 (hard to gauge as I am salary) But I've come to one startling realization tonight.... Everything I've ever done and everything I've ever been told has been compared to the lives of the less fortunate.... the downtrodden... people who have many years on me and are making less than I make. My mother used to say that I could not compare myself to the worst child in the class. I was forced to compare myself to the elite. This drove me to an extent. It taught me that to excel at anything I needed to work hard, study and develop my intellect. Somewhere along the line I lost sight of this. I became content with myself. I saw a slip in my ability to carry an articulate conversation, to use words to their full potential. I've become complacent with my abilities. I've compared myself to the lowest ranks of workers this country has to offer and found peace of mind in the process. But at the same time, what can I truly expect from myself? College drop out turned worker bee. I should be grateful for what I have, but I can't but wonder of what I could achieve. But is it possible? The higher you work up in the hive, the less time and resources you have to educate yourself. Its an interesting dilemma. Do I stay the course and rely on a solid income with the potential for merit increases as I've been told I deserve, or do I stop comparing myself to what I've hoped to overcome, and instead work towords developing myself in the hopes of something greater.