The Power Behind A Decent Editor...
Or, you know, bothering to research some of the most basic concepts on which the show you're writing about is based. I generally suck at writing reviews and I'm not big on bagging someone out for the sake of bagging someone out, but dayam The Power Behind The Throne just scribbled all over my favourite drawing in crayon.
I could sum this book up as '1930's Nazi Germany in space... but not really'. While I'm all for learning from our past - blatantly copying history from a high school text book, whacking our intrepid heroes in there - who aside from Teal'c do nothing until the end of the book (Another reason I am a wee bit pissed - why is Teal'c not on the cover?) and somehow managing to get 17 pieces of canon wrong does not instil any kind of confidence in this trilogy.
Aside from some dodgy characterisation, which can happen from time to time - it's subjective to a degree, I only found the plot to be anywhere near interesting (aka original) right at the end. The last page and a half actually left me wanting to read the next book (which I would have ended up doing anyway because I hate leaving things unfinished).
I don't want to spoil the book for anyone brave or foolhardy enough to read it all the way through :P but I did jot down the inconsistencies I found with regard to canon and a few other mistakes which I will put under a cut. Please tell me more if I missed any!
Page 7: "Neryn threw herself from her feet, barely avoiding the sizzling arc of blue energy as the bolt tore into the wall."
I could be nitpicking here, but last I checked, staff weapon fire was decidedly yellow. I wonder if the author was confusing it with a zat?
Page 8: "The malfeasance dripped from his tongue as he stepped toward her."
Unless smack talk is illegal, I can't see malfeasance dripping from anywhere. I don't think that word means what you think it means.
Pages 11/12: "Chevron two locked!"
The chevron guy calls out the chevrons locking for an incoming wormhole. Granted on the show we have seen inconsistencies as to the gate spinning and not spinning when they have an incoming wormhole, but he never calls out the chevrons locking for an incoming wormhole.
Page 13: "One of the riflemen squeezed off a single shot before he could stop himself."
I concede this one may be another nitpick, but I cannot imagine the SGC commissioning anyone so inept/trigger happy in the program, let alone in the gate room.
Pages15/16/17: "Perhaps it would be wise to trace the point of origin before the wormhole is allowed to disengage."
Pepper pointed this one out, and Pepp, I feel like Bernard Black filling out his tax form, 'WHAT?!!?!' Apparently in the book they can somehow magically figure out the gate address of the world from which an incoming wormhole has... come... from. Never mind such ability was never expressed on the show - in fact it wasn't possible in The Other Side wherein the SGC had to wait for Alar to transmit his coordinates.
Page 26: "...and bookshelves weighed down with manila folders stuffed bursting with papers..."
This is an alien describing an alien place. There is no way he could be referring to a 'manila folder' as the term manila comes from the manila hemp fibre from the abaca tree - the pulp of which is used to make manila folders. The abaca trees also come from Manila, the capital of the Philippines.
"He had an eye for Fraudulent Bric-a-Brac and Kelkus had a hoarded a world's worth of it down here."
The term 'Bric-a-brac' is from the 1800's. Other 'Earthisms' the aliens seem to have no trouble with - 'parachute', 'plane' (page 106) 'kidney tray', 'saline', 'drip' (page 181), 'Ghetto' (page 191), 'third degree burns' (page 218), not to mention the trains *everywhere*.
Pages 29/30: "The serpent's tail lashed against his clavicle, and then with a sudden and shocking flurry of motion, reared up and plunged into the man's gaping mouth."
In The Tok'ra part 2 Martouf explains that the Goa'uld never enter a host through the mouth as they do not wish to be reminded of the horror on the host's face when they look into the mirror. Apparently this Goa'uld didn't get the memo.
Page 34: "Can you imagine this in someone like Apophis' hands?"
Someone dead like Apophis? We find out on page 268 when the Mujina reads Teal'c's mind that Apophis is dead so why would Daniel choose Apophis as someone to worry about? This book has to be set in season 5 if Apophis is dead (there was no point in season 4 where they thought he *might* be dead and the book mentions the Asgard ship 'The O'Neill'), Daniel is still around and Teal'c has his symbiote.
Page 44: "It didn't take a huge leap of the imagination to picture a Mayberry or a Kinsey with something like the Mujina by their side, and imagine the reflection their flawed humanity would conjure from the creature."
Mayberry? Unless this is some new Earth side baddie to be brought up in one of the latter books, one can only assume they are referring to Maybourne - who in season 5 was in hiding and hardly in any kind of position to be able to access or manipulate the Mujina if they brought it back to Earth.
Page 74: "He closed his eyes when he saw Sarah looking up at him."
Wrong Sara honey - Jack's Sara has no 'h' on the end of her name. I have seen a few other novels make the same mistake.
Page 76: "Kelnorim offered a refuge for his mind, tranquillity."
"Kel'no'reem' tends to do a much better job of that...
Page 87: "One of the white-coated gate technicians punched in the code to open the iris, and out in the gate room the huge Naqahdah shield contracted smoothly into the Stargate's frame."
This sentence probably made me headdesk the hardest. Since season 2's Show & Tell, the iris is retracted by a hand scanner, not a 'code'. The iris is not made from Naquadah, it's a trinium titanium alloy (Serpent's Song). And while I have seen Naquadah spelt quite a few ways, the spelling on the official site is 'Naquadah', not 'Naqahdah'.
Page 93/94: "Is that even possible?" O'Neill asked. "I mean for the wormhole to jump like that? I thought these things were locked in once a connection was established?"
Oh yes honey, you experienced it in Solitudes, an occurrence that is mentioned later on in the book! And Sam also has no clue, even though she forced the gate to do just herself in A Matter of Time.
"She was talking about the building blocks of creation, using the language of the creator."
"Huh? It's already established earlier in the book that Sam does not believe in a god/creator. This is also canon from Line In The Sand. If anything she is using the language of Hawking as she is merely talking about basic theories. I can only assume this is the author's own flowery way of expressing some outside observer's awe at Sam's brilliance.
Page 95: "Then we need to find the point of origin, simple," Jack said, knowing it was anything but."
Sure it is! It's called 'one of these things is not like the others'. There's what? 30-something symbols on the DHD. Punching in Earth's address along with a 7th unknown symbol wouldn't take all that long. There was no need for them to stray far from the gate at all.
Page 97: "Hammond checked his watch. The iris had been opened for a minute under three hours... There were protocols in place that prevented him from leaving the Stargate open indefinitely,..."
"They hadn't been able to re-establish contact and they didn't dare risk leaving the gate open much longer for fear of what might come through."
I believe a 'holy hannah!' is appropriate here. Regardless of weather the iris is open or closed, something can only come through and get you if there is an established wormhole. The author makes it sound as if unknown evils are going to pop out of the thin air wafting inside the ring. I also cannot recall a time on the show in which the iris is permanently closed over the gate when it's not open.
Page 185: "Teal'c gathered it up and fed it back into the breeding pouch in his stomach."
*Brain bleach!!!* Breeding pouch? Really? Ain't no Goa'uld jiggy going on in there. That's an incubation pouch for larval Goa'uld.
Page 267: "It was almost as fulfilling as the Sol'vah's blood would have been."
'Sol'vah'? *sigh* I'm done...
I could sum this book up as '1930's Nazi Germany in space... but not really'. While I'm all for learning from our past - blatantly copying history from a high school text book, whacking our intrepid heroes in there - who aside from Teal'c do nothing until the end of the book (Another reason I am a wee bit pissed - why is Teal'c not on the cover?) and somehow managing to get 17 pieces of canon wrong does not instil any kind of confidence in this trilogy.
Aside from some dodgy characterisation, which can happen from time to time - it's subjective to a degree, I only found the plot to be anywhere near interesting (aka original) right at the end. The last page and a half actually left me wanting to read the next book (which I would have ended up doing anyway because I hate leaving things unfinished).
I don't want to spoil the book for anyone brave or foolhardy enough to read it all the way through :P but I did jot down the inconsistencies I found with regard to canon and a few other mistakes which I will put under a cut. Please tell me more if I missed any!
Page 7: "Neryn threw herself from her feet, barely avoiding the sizzling arc of blue energy as the bolt tore into the wall."
I could be nitpicking here, but last I checked, staff weapon fire was decidedly yellow. I wonder if the author was confusing it with a zat?
Page 8: "The malfeasance dripped from his tongue as he stepped toward her."
Unless smack talk is illegal, I can't see malfeasance dripping from anywhere. I don't think that word means what you think it means.
Pages 11/12: "Chevron two locked!"
The chevron guy calls out the chevrons locking for an incoming wormhole. Granted on the show we have seen inconsistencies as to the gate spinning and not spinning when they have an incoming wormhole, but he never calls out the chevrons locking for an incoming wormhole.
Page 13: "One of the riflemen squeezed off a single shot before he could stop himself."
I concede this one may be another nitpick, but I cannot imagine the SGC commissioning anyone so inept/trigger happy in the program, let alone in the gate room.
Pages15/16/17: "Perhaps it would be wise to trace the point of origin before the wormhole is allowed to disengage."
Pepper pointed this one out, and Pepp, I feel like Bernard Black filling out his tax form, 'WHAT?!!?!' Apparently in the book they can somehow magically figure out the gate address of the world from which an incoming wormhole has... come... from. Never mind such ability was never expressed on the show - in fact it wasn't possible in The Other Side wherein the SGC had to wait for Alar to transmit his coordinates.
Page 26: "...and bookshelves weighed down with manila folders stuffed bursting with papers..."
This is an alien describing an alien place. There is no way he could be referring to a 'manila folder' as the term manila comes from the manila hemp fibre from the abaca tree - the pulp of which is used to make manila folders. The abaca trees also come from Manila, the capital of the Philippines.
"He had an eye for Fraudulent Bric-a-Brac and Kelkus had a hoarded a world's worth of it down here."
The term 'Bric-a-brac' is from the 1800's. Other 'Earthisms' the aliens seem to have no trouble with - 'parachute', 'plane' (page 106) 'kidney tray', 'saline', 'drip' (page 181), 'Ghetto' (page 191), 'third degree burns' (page 218), not to mention the trains *everywhere*.
Pages 29/30: "The serpent's tail lashed against his clavicle, and then with a sudden and shocking flurry of motion, reared up and plunged into the man's gaping mouth."
In The Tok'ra part 2 Martouf explains that the Goa'uld never enter a host through the mouth as they do not wish to be reminded of the horror on the host's face when they look into the mirror. Apparently this Goa'uld didn't get the memo.
Page 34: "Can you imagine this in someone like Apophis' hands?"
Someone dead like Apophis? We find out on page 268 when the Mujina reads Teal'c's mind that Apophis is dead so why would Daniel choose Apophis as someone to worry about? This book has to be set in season 5 if Apophis is dead (there was no point in season 4 where they thought he *might* be dead and the book mentions the Asgard ship 'The O'Neill'), Daniel is still around and Teal'c has his symbiote.
Page 44: "It didn't take a huge leap of the imagination to picture a Mayberry or a Kinsey with something like the Mujina by their side, and imagine the reflection their flawed humanity would conjure from the creature."
Mayberry? Unless this is some new Earth side baddie to be brought up in one of the latter books, one can only assume they are referring to Maybourne - who in season 5 was in hiding and hardly in any kind of position to be able to access or manipulate the Mujina if they brought it back to Earth.
Page 74: "He closed his eyes when he saw Sarah looking up at him."
Wrong Sara honey - Jack's Sara has no 'h' on the end of her name. I have seen a few other novels make the same mistake.
Page 76: "Kelnorim offered a refuge for his mind, tranquillity."
"Kel'no'reem' tends to do a much better job of that...
Page 87: "One of the white-coated gate technicians punched in the code to open the iris, and out in the gate room the huge Naqahdah shield contracted smoothly into the Stargate's frame."
This sentence probably made me headdesk the hardest. Since season 2's Show & Tell, the iris is retracted by a hand scanner, not a 'code'. The iris is not made from Naquadah, it's a trinium titanium alloy (Serpent's Song). And while I have seen Naquadah spelt quite a few ways, the spelling on the official site is 'Naquadah', not 'Naqahdah'.
Page 93/94: "Is that even possible?" O'Neill asked. "I mean for the wormhole to jump like that? I thought these things were locked in once a connection was established?"
Oh yes honey, you experienced it in Solitudes, an occurrence that is mentioned later on in the book! And Sam also has no clue, even though she forced the gate to do just herself in A Matter of Time.
"She was talking about the building blocks of creation, using the language of the creator."
"Huh? It's already established earlier in the book that Sam does not believe in a god/creator. This is also canon from Line In The Sand. If anything she is using the language of Hawking as she is merely talking about basic theories. I can only assume this is the author's own flowery way of expressing some outside observer's awe at Sam's brilliance.
Page 95: "Then we need to find the point of origin, simple," Jack said, knowing it was anything but."
Sure it is! It's called 'one of these things is not like the others'. There's what? 30-something symbols on the DHD. Punching in Earth's address along with a 7th unknown symbol wouldn't take all that long. There was no need for them to stray far from the gate at all.
Page 97: "Hammond checked his watch. The iris had been opened for a minute under three hours... There were protocols in place that prevented him from leaving the Stargate open indefinitely,..."
"They hadn't been able to re-establish contact and they didn't dare risk leaving the gate open much longer for fear of what might come through."
I believe a 'holy hannah!' is appropriate here. Regardless of weather the iris is open or closed, something can only come through and get you if there is an established wormhole. The author makes it sound as if unknown evils are going to pop out of the thin air wafting inside the ring. I also cannot recall a time on the show in which the iris is permanently closed over the gate when it's not open.
Page 185: "Teal'c gathered it up and fed it back into the breeding pouch in his stomach."
*Brain bleach!!!* Breeding pouch? Really? Ain't no Goa'uld jiggy going on in there. That's an incubation pouch for larval Goa'uld.
Page 267: "It was almost as fulfilling as the Sol'vah's blood would have been."
'Sol'vah'? *sigh* I'm done...