Back to devastation
So on top of everything that was already going on, my grandma was in the hospital. But she's been in and out of the hospital a lot lately, so I thought it was just one of those times. But I found out yesterday, that she's going to die. My parents haven't been telling me things to try to protect me. But I felt like something was wrong and I asked my mom if she thought my mom was going to die, completely expecting her to say no, but she said yes. And today I found out they are taking her off the ventilator and sedating her until she dies. Gone. I can't accept this concept. And it was scary because my mom sounded really calm on the phone, and the whole family is together except me because I'm here. by myself. and the one person who has comforted me over the last year is gone because he won't talk to me. And it hurts. It all hurts...so much. I'm flying out there Friday, but what am I supposed to do for the next two days? How much strength am I supposed to have? I can't take much more. I already know that I'm losing it. Why does everything bad happen all at once? Why? There are no answers to my questions, I know.