tl;dr, whining, being dramatic
Asian parents (especially Vietnamese) are fucking crazy.
Have you seen this video? It's totally true. If you get a B+ in something, your parents will beat you, call the school, call the teacher, and "ground" you (as if you were allowed to go anywhere to begin with. "Grounding" for me as a child meant locking me in a closet or a bathroom for extended periods of time). Even in elementary school.
See that cute little Asian girl with her family when you're at the store? Her parents probably make her weed the yard (among other things) even though she's 6 years old. They scream at her, tell her she's lazy, fat and stupid (in both languages! How thoughtful of them) on a daily basis. "But Asian children are so well behaved!" you say. It's because they're too scared not to be. And the way they act is considered by their parents to be delinquent anyway.
Social life? You don't get one, sorry. You got a 97% percent on your math test, so you have to stay home and memorize the textbook every night (I can't believe you missed a question you moron). What? Teardrops got on it because you were crying when your father was beating you with a knife? You fucking screwup. Stop fucking crying! You don't have much of a social life anyway, because your parents have stunted you emotionally and socially, rendering your personality and way of speaking and acting completely dysfunctional in society. By the way, you better finish within 30 minutes. You're the only child who is taking over an hour. NO OTHER kid takes more than an hour to do their homework, you're just slow.
Anything over 95 pounds is considered obese. 91-94 pounds is extremely overweight. You'll never marry an Asian doctor if you're 100+ pounds. Plus, you're the laughingstock of the community for being such a fatass. No dinner tonight (or any night, fatty). I can't believe you even wanted to eat, greedy slob.
Being an adult doesn't change anything. The dynamic is exactly the same. When your parents speak to you, it's like you're that sniveling 6 year old girl again. Half of you is still struggling for that warmth and acceptance you saw all those little white girls getting from their parents, and the other half of you knows you'll never get it no matter how successful you are, and you just stay bitter.
Oh the patriarchy. Being a girl, you are outranked by your brother. You are expected to clean up after him, be blamed for things he does, and screamed at if you ever get into an argument with him. If he is ever beating you up, you must have provoked him, therefore it is your fault. Your parents will be extra ashamed of you because you didn't turn out to be a boy. You are expected to act like both a docile housewife and be a doctor when you are an adult. When you are married to an Asian doctor, he better be in control of you, or else you're just being a horrible excuse for a woman.
Love, warmth, hugging, comfort, all of these things are COMPLETELY foreign to most Asian kids. They do not know or understand these white people rituals. When we see white people hugging each other, this is really weird. If you see an Asian girl who is OK with hugging, she's most likely either adopted, or had/has a lot of white friends and learned this behavior.
Furthermore, your parents are in denial of, well, all of this. They think they were and are perfect parents who loved and nurtured you. You are totally making all of this up. How could you do this to them?? You are ungrateful and you want to blame all of your problems on your parents.
There's also this whole torture that is "Vietnamese school" (see: bootcamp, military school) set up for children of immigrants to the US. It's basically the same BS social control/oppression for children tactics, but in a formalized educational setting (and you learn to speak flawless Vietnamese, considering the tactics they use to get you to learn it).
I could really go on (and on and on). I could write a whole book about it, if I knew how to write a book.
Have you seen this video? It's totally true. If you get a B+ in something, your parents will beat you, call the school, call the teacher, and "ground" you (as if you were allowed to go anywhere to begin with. "Grounding" for me as a child meant locking me in a closet or a bathroom for extended periods of time). Even in elementary school.
See that cute little Asian girl with her family when you're at the store? Her parents probably make her weed the yard (among other things) even though she's 6 years old. They scream at her, tell her she's lazy, fat and stupid (in both languages! How thoughtful of them) on a daily basis. "But Asian children are so well behaved!" you say. It's because they're too scared not to be. And the way they act is considered by their parents to be delinquent anyway.
Social life? You don't get one, sorry. You got a 97% percent on your math test, so you have to stay home and memorize the textbook every night (I can't believe you missed a question you moron). What? Teardrops got on it because you were crying when your father was beating you with a knife? You fucking screwup. Stop fucking crying! You don't have much of a social life anyway, because your parents have stunted you emotionally and socially, rendering your personality and way of speaking and acting completely dysfunctional in society. By the way, you better finish within 30 minutes. You're the only child who is taking over an hour. NO OTHER kid takes more than an hour to do their homework, you're just slow.
Anything over 95 pounds is considered obese. 91-94 pounds is extremely overweight. You'll never marry an Asian doctor if you're 100+ pounds. Plus, you're the laughingstock of the community for being such a fatass. No dinner tonight (or any night, fatty). I can't believe you even wanted to eat, greedy slob.
Being an adult doesn't change anything. The dynamic is exactly the same. When your parents speak to you, it's like you're that sniveling 6 year old girl again. Half of you is still struggling for that warmth and acceptance you saw all those little white girls getting from their parents, and the other half of you knows you'll never get it no matter how successful you are, and you just stay bitter.
Oh the patriarchy. Being a girl, you are outranked by your brother. You are expected to clean up after him, be blamed for things he does, and screamed at if you ever get into an argument with him. If he is ever beating you up, you must have provoked him, therefore it is your fault. Your parents will be extra ashamed of you because you didn't turn out to be a boy. You are expected to act like both a docile housewife and be a doctor when you are an adult. When you are married to an Asian doctor, he better be in control of you, or else you're just being a horrible excuse for a woman.
Love, warmth, hugging, comfort, all of these things are COMPLETELY foreign to most Asian kids. They do not know or understand these white people rituals. When we see white people hugging each other, this is really weird. If you see an Asian girl who is OK with hugging, she's most likely either adopted, or had/has a lot of white friends and learned this behavior.
Furthermore, your parents are in denial of, well, all of this. They think they were and are perfect parents who loved and nurtured you. You are totally making all of this up. How could you do this to them?? You are ungrateful and you want to blame all of your problems on your parents.
There's also this whole torture that is "Vietnamese school" (see: bootcamp, military school) set up for children of immigrants to the US. It's basically the same BS social control/oppression for children tactics, but in a formalized educational setting (and you learn to speak flawless Vietnamese, considering the tactics they use to get you to learn it).
I could really go on (and on and on). I could write a whole book about it, if I knew how to write a book.