why not? no one reads this shit any more anyways.
I really wish I could figure myself out.
I've been happier than I ever have been lately--I mean, consistently, genuinely happy for more than an hour or a day--something that I've never experienced before in my coherent post-pubescent life.
But i am SO restless.
So indecisive.
My heart breaks constantly because I always want to be somewhere else, and I can't decide where that somewhere is.
I want to quit school and move somewhere different and unknown, like Marfa or Ireland.
But then, I love everything about Austin and the stability and happiness it brings to my life.
And I love school, well, most of it.
I want to sing. I want to only sing for the rest of my life.
But then, I want to help people. I want to help the environment. I want to help animals.
I want to major in Environmental Science, Sociology, Social Work, and Wildlife Biology at the same time.
I want to be single, independent, and free.
But then, I see everyone close to me fall in love and I want so badly to be know what it feels like to be able to trust somebody that much.
I want to not give a shit.
But it's not in my nature. It's impossible for me to not throw my whole self in every single thing I do. It's impossible for me to not be passionate.
And a lot of the time, being passionate really sucks.
I've been happier than I ever have been lately--I mean, consistently, genuinely happy for more than an hour or a day--something that I've never experienced before in my coherent post-pubescent life.
But i am SO restless.
So indecisive.
My heart breaks constantly because I always want to be somewhere else, and I can't decide where that somewhere is.
I want to quit school and move somewhere different and unknown, like Marfa or Ireland.
But then, I love everything about Austin and the stability and happiness it brings to my life.
And I love school, well, most of it.
I want to sing. I want to only sing for the rest of my life.
But then, I want to help people. I want to help the environment. I want to help animals.
I want to major in Environmental Science, Sociology, Social Work, and Wildlife Biology at the same time.
I want to be single, independent, and free.
But then, I see everyone close to me fall in love and I want so badly to be know what it feels like to be able to trust somebody that much.
I want to not give a shit.
But it's not in my nature. It's impossible for me to not throw my whole self in every single thing I do. It's impossible for me to not be passionate.
And a lot of the time, being passionate really sucks.