The rantings of a hideous woman
Ok, so I'm having a pretty bad day. I mean, not terrible. I guess it's not that bad...but anyway...I was in a bad mood and I got on live journal and read my friend's last posts and they made me smile. I really have some good friends. I'm glad that I'm getting to talk to them more and spend more time with them.
yeah...I was walking to class today and this guy was sitting at one of the picnic tables and I walked by him just minding my own business and he said something about me not even having an ass. It really hurt. I mean...I thought college was different than high school...I mean...everyone has seemed so accepting and nice and stuff...but I guess people are just assholes no matter where you go. So anyway..this man was pretty overweight and I'm not trying to be a bitch but I mean...I would think he'd be happy with any type of action he could get and so I'm like..wow..am I that hideous that:
A. they can't even have enough respect for me to hold back their suprise at my unattractiveness until I've walked past them
and
B. Even someone completely desperate for lovin' finds me so undesirable he feels the need to express that thought.
What the hell? So yeah...I feel like a hag today. So I'm thinking...what if Jon just thinks I'm attractive because he loves me. What if one day he turns around and sees what everyone else sees. I mean..I don't think he'd leave me...but would he really be as happy with me? I mean...I like that he thinks I'm pretty and all...I like that he feels like he's showing me off to people when we go out. I just feel bad because I'm really affraid he's going to stop being blind to the way I really look. I don't know..I mean..I think Jon's really attractive and amazing and he could get someone better? So what's to stop him once he realizes this? Anyway..yeah...so Jeff and I have been talking about people who whine about stuff like this but aren't doing anything about it and so we're just like SHUT THE FUCK UP THEN! So I'm going to start trying to be prettier. I might do something different with my hair...Definately going to be working out so that means I'm looking for a work out partner...Definately keeping my legs and other regions shaved and/or bare by one means or another...Maybe tanning a little bit..doing my make-up the way I used to again...you know...putting it on. Anyways..so all my friends are really pretty and it'd be cool if you guys felt compelled to help me overcome my unattractiveness. YAY!! NO MORE UGLY MAGGIE!
In other news..I spoke to Jessy between Music and Theatre yesterday and i was SO HAPPY! I'm so glad that we could just talk. I hope that this wasn't just a one time thing because she is such a happy and inspiring person. She helps me to have a more optimistic and open-minded view of the world and I like that. I was so glad to hear how her life's going and tell her about mine and just kinda pretend things had always been like they always were. Talking to her yesterday really made my day better. It put a smile on my face. :)
Because of this good mood I felt compelled to pick some guys up on my way out of ICC. I saw their car on the side of the road that takes you out of ICC and then a little ways down I saw them walking with a gas can. So I pulled over and offered them a ride to the gas station. They were really thankful and nice. This is the second time I've driven a random stranger from ICC somewhere. Both times have been really good experiences and it kind of makes me hope that by doing this nice gesture for these people it will inspire them to pay that favor forward to someone else...kind of like Pay it Forward the movie. I dunno...it just makes me feel like I've done something good for someone. Sometimes I think that we're all just in too big of a rush and so caught up in our own lives that we don't just stop and...i dunno..just be nice and kind and stuff. I dunno...anyway...I'll get off my soap box. Anyways...I have absolutely nothing to do right now...so maybe I'll post a cutie..haven't done that in a while.
TATA!
yeah...I was walking to class today and this guy was sitting at one of the picnic tables and I walked by him just minding my own business and he said something about me not even having an ass. It really hurt. I mean...I thought college was different than high school...I mean...everyone has seemed so accepting and nice and stuff...but I guess people are just assholes no matter where you go. So anyway..this man was pretty overweight and I'm not trying to be a bitch but I mean...I would think he'd be happy with any type of action he could get and so I'm like..wow..am I that hideous that:
A. they can't even have enough respect for me to hold back their suprise at my unattractiveness until I've walked past them
and
B. Even someone completely desperate for lovin' finds me so undesirable he feels the need to express that thought.
What the hell? So yeah...I feel like a hag today. So I'm thinking...what if Jon just thinks I'm attractive because he loves me. What if one day he turns around and sees what everyone else sees. I mean..I don't think he'd leave me...but would he really be as happy with me? I mean...I like that he thinks I'm pretty and all...I like that he feels like he's showing me off to people when we go out. I just feel bad because I'm really affraid he's going to stop being blind to the way I really look. I don't know..I mean..I think Jon's really attractive and amazing and he could get someone better? So what's to stop him once he realizes this? Anyway..yeah...so Jeff and I have been talking about people who whine about stuff like this but aren't doing anything about it and so we're just like SHUT THE FUCK UP THEN! So I'm going to start trying to be prettier. I might do something different with my hair...Definately going to be working out so that means I'm looking for a work out partner...Definately keeping my legs and other regions shaved and/or bare by one means or another...Maybe tanning a little bit..doing my make-up the way I used to again...you know...putting it on. Anyways..so all my friends are really pretty and it'd be cool if you guys felt compelled to help me overcome my unattractiveness. YAY!! NO MORE UGLY MAGGIE!
In other news..I spoke to Jessy between Music and Theatre yesterday and i was SO HAPPY! I'm so glad that we could just talk. I hope that this wasn't just a one time thing because she is such a happy and inspiring person. She helps me to have a more optimistic and open-minded view of the world and I like that. I was so glad to hear how her life's going and tell her about mine and just kinda pretend things had always been like they always were. Talking to her yesterday really made my day better. It put a smile on my face. :)
Because of this good mood I felt compelled to pick some guys up on my way out of ICC. I saw their car on the side of the road that takes you out of ICC and then a little ways down I saw them walking with a gas can. So I pulled over and offered them a ride to the gas station. They were really thankful and nice. This is the second time I've driven a random stranger from ICC somewhere. Both times have been really good experiences and it kind of makes me hope that by doing this nice gesture for these people it will inspire them to pay that favor forward to someone else...kind of like Pay it Forward the movie. I dunno...it just makes me feel like I've done something good for someone. Sometimes I think that we're all just in too big of a rush and so caught up in our own lives that we don't just stop and...i dunno..just be nice and kind and stuff. I dunno...anyway...I'll get off my soap box. Anyways...I have absolutely nothing to do right now...so maybe I'll post a cutie..haven't done that in a while.
TATA!