why????
why is it that i go through surgery and have all these tests done and now the tests come back "abnormal".i feel as though i live in the unchanging world of abnormal.basically my vagina is fucked up.ever since i was was 18 ive had "abnormal" paps...so i changed doctors bc the previous one neglected the care that i needed.the doctors now are super.they got me into surgery and said that it should help out my problem with this "abnormal" shit.well it hasnt and i know its not their fault bc they are trying to help me from whatever this is.im 22 now and i wish it would stop.i wish it would go away.i have more doctors appointments than anything.i hangout with my doctors more than my friends.i get so frustrated bc maybe i thought that everything "would" be ok.but i guess life goes on and i shouldnt complain bc im still alive and soem ppl have it worse.i do wish though that i had kids already so i could tell them fuck this just take my uterus out...ill gladly say goodbye.thats the only reason i havent let it go.kids.i would like to someday create life...but if i go on like this will i even be able to??all these tests and things??