what makes one may make two
I didn't get the randomness I thought I would get, instead it was something unexpected and delightful. Delightful, of light, full of light, we are characters in a dark space that never expected to see the light of day, or even a facsimile. Back to my story, I couldn't find my time card in its usual collective nest, so I asked the SM Rep where it was. He said I had to wait, that he had something for me, it was a surprise. Usually, surprises from my bosses mean that they have tasks required of me, machines that only I can tame and that I'm going to be extremely tired by the end of the day. However, my shift was finished, I was on my way out, what could they possibly be laying at my feet at six pm on a wednesday? An mp3 player. A RCA Lyra 128 Flash Memory MP3 player with expandable SD/MMC slot. I didn't believe them, and yet he persisted. He made me wait till after shift change, then took my picture with a polaroid camera, I smiled out of sheer neglect of my surroundings, I didn't realize that I wanted to feel apathetic. I thought today was going to be the day that someone would die, that I would have to deal with absence, with an empty space, with the insertation of another other in my otherwise mundane existance. I have that impression everyday. I walked down the length of the factory, through Press 2016, past skid after skid of Real Simple inserts, through the paper warehouse, wondering if today would be the day that one of the fifty foot high, multi-ton stacks would fall and crush me, out the door into the biproduct of the earth's rotation/temperature shifts/landscape, my car with Joanna Newsom telling me things I already knew, like the place I live is damp and ghostly. I leave for Barcelona in less than three months, what else do I know of this place than the things that make me want to leave it? I watched a Passport to Europe the other day that featured my future surroundings, and I was utterly squelched by its Europeaness. I'm having a bit of fun / learning a bit of Catalan. Com es diu aixo en catala? After Barcelona, I'm going to Bilbao for a few days. From there, I can't decide, though I believe my final destination will be Dublin. From there I will venture and soar. Here is an exerpt from my last conversation with myself: I'd hate to have to make this speech, because I know that as I am saying it, I will instantly begin to disagree with it. The Campfire Headphase has made me extremely surroundness. 'Fast cars / fine ass / these things will pass / and they won't grow more profound. / Time is a game only children play well / how can i love you if you won't lie down?' And now I move back to the forth of my bed, you make my life saner you pile of futon. Bona nit.