Keep cool, my babies.
Conan won't follow Leno at 12:05 on The Tonight Show.
This pisses me off so much. I love Conan, and I love Conan's Tonight Show. Jay Leno hasn't been funny since 1996, and I'm pretty sure Johnny Carson's spinning in his grave right now. So I've changed my Facebook picture, and y'know what? I'm With Coco.
I'm not sure if it was something I ate last night, or something I ate in a quantity, or if it was the Diet Dr. Pepper, or I dunno, maybe someone beat me in the head with a stick at some point in the middle of the night, but whatever happened, I had some fucked-up dreams.
First, I'm 90% sure I dreamt that Aunt Amy wanted me to join into a threesome. Yeah, you read that right. Thankfully, Aunt Amy's husband was nowhere to be seen in my dream (THANK YOU JEEBUS OR WHATEVER GOD GAVE ME THAT REPRIEVE, YOU ARE GETTING A FRUIT BASKET IN THE MAIL FROM ME AS THANKS), and I turned her down, but ... yeah, weird.
But weirder than that? Okay, so yes, I dream in color, but rarely do I dream from another person's perspective. And the perspective of this second dream? My kid. My daughter, to be precise. And who would be the kid's father?
Brad.
So apparently - in my dream - Brad knew he was the father of my kid, but clearly didn't have anything to do with her upbringing? And somehow, I/Alaina was having a fight with Brad that I/The Kid was watching? And she was trying to figure out why Mommy was so mad?
I have no fricking idea what that was all about. Hopefully won't happen again.
In other news, remember when Flexo threw away my chicken? He's been thinking it was a duck this whole time. IT WASN'T A DUCK, IT WAS A CHICKEN!
(I can't tell you how long I've wanted to say this) FLEXO, YOU IGNORANT SLUT.
This pisses me off so much. I love Conan, and I love Conan's Tonight Show. Jay Leno hasn't been funny since 1996, and I'm pretty sure Johnny Carson's spinning in his grave right now. So I've changed my Facebook picture, and y'know what? I'm With Coco.
I'm not sure if it was something I ate last night, or something I ate in a quantity, or if it was the Diet Dr. Pepper, or I dunno, maybe someone beat me in the head with a stick at some point in the middle of the night, but whatever happened, I had some fucked-up dreams.
First, I'm 90% sure I dreamt that Aunt Amy wanted me to join into a threesome. Yeah, you read that right. Thankfully, Aunt Amy's husband was nowhere to be seen in my dream (THANK YOU JEEBUS OR WHATEVER GOD GAVE ME THAT REPRIEVE, YOU ARE GETTING A FRUIT BASKET IN THE MAIL FROM ME AS THANKS), and I turned her down, but ... yeah, weird.
But weirder than that? Okay, so yes, I dream in color, but rarely do I dream from another person's perspective. And the perspective of this second dream? My kid. My daughter, to be precise. And who would be the kid's father?
Brad.
So apparently - in my dream - Brad knew he was the father of my kid, but clearly didn't have anything to do with her upbringing? And somehow, I/Alaina was having a fight with Brad that I/The Kid was watching? And she was trying to figure out why Mommy was so mad?
I have no fricking idea what that was all about. Hopefully won't happen again.
In other news, remember when Flexo threw away my chicken? He's been thinking it was a duck this whole time. IT WASN'T A DUCK, IT WAS A CHICKEN!
(I can't tell you how long I've wanted to say this) FLEXO, YOU IGNORANT SLUT.