clinics and hospitals and questions... oh my!
Gawd..... I had to go to a clinic yesterday and get evaluated for depression because I'm the third girl in the past week to cut her arm -__-; It's Megan's fault. She was the second to cut her arm. When I did, I told her not to tell people and she did. Even though she PROMISED not to. Whatever. She told 4 of her friends. And then she goes "It's only 4." and those 4 told other people. Those people told teachers. And the teachers told the counselor. The counselor told my mom. My mom told the clinic ^_^ My appointment was at 9:00 AM yesterday, but we had to leave at 8:30 AM so we wouldn't be late. I'm afraid of needles, blood, clinics, hospitals, and that kind of stuff. So I was freaking out. So I went ALL the way to school at 8:00 AM because I wanted to talk to Mr. Jiran because I was freaking the fuck out... He hugged me. Which calmed me down a bit. We talked for about.. 20 minutes or so. And after that, I was calm and happy and stuff. He calmed me down, made me laugh, and stuff. But, then I got to the clinic. And started crying. I'm afraid of that kind of stuff, remember?? And they asked me things like... well.. this is how one question went:
Heidi: Are you sexually active?
Me: No.
Heidi: It's okay, you can tell me the truth.
Me: I'm NOT!
I'm not fucking sexually active, lady -__-; What part of "no" didn't you get?
But, Heidi was really cool. She was one of those people where, as soon as they walk in the door, you know you can tell them anything. In fact, she's probably one of the coolest and nicest people I've ever met! She said that if I ever feel like hurting myself again, I can always call her. Thanks Heidi <333
I'm just glad it turned out better than I thought it would ^_^
My mom said I'd have to pee in a cup, get blood taken, wear a paper gown, and all that crap. But, I didn't. I got weighed, they checked my height and blood pressure, and asked me a shit load of questions.
When I was talking to Heidi, I was all.... awake and hyper. I kept smiling. And it turns out that she doesn't think I'm depressed at all. She just thinks that I have a few stresses... Okay.. she didn't say a few. I talked to her about Kristen. I kept reffering to Kristen as "my best friend" and I told her how she used to hurt herself and I'd try to help but I thought I couldn't. And that I really care and worry for Kristen. And all that.. She just simply told me that I should try talking Kristen into talking to someone and that even though I try to help, I can't always fix people's problems. Not that you have problems, hun!!! You don't!
When I was talking to Mr. Jiran and he randomly told me he was on a "fat losing thing" (in his words..) and I was like... "uh. Okay O__o;" When what I SHOULD have said and WANTED to say was that I was happy for him ^_^ Even though I really don't think he's fat. It's his choice. And I'm happy for him =3
My new Forum name at TDF is "Pickle". As you can see by my avatar. I made it. I even drew the girl in it. XD I also made Ashley a new avatar. She seemed to like it. I hope she really did like it, anyway.
And I had a weird-ass dream with me, brandi, mel', and aaron in it last night X__x;
We were walking around in the dollar store by my hosue. Then Aaron made me laugh and I snorted o__o; I NEVER snort Xx; Then we all took pictures together and stuff. Then I woke up. Um... Can you say WEIRD? Lmao!
Anyway, I gotta go soon. Plus, I'm tired.
Soooooo.. I love you Kristen, Ashley, Ben, April, Blair, Melissa, Brandi, Aaron, Angel, and Jessica!!! Good night and sweet dreams to you guys!
Heidi: Are you sexually active?
Me: No.
Heidi: It's okay, you can tell me the truth.
Me: I'm NOT!
I'm not fucking sexually active, lady -__-; What part of "no" didn't you get?
But, Heidi was really cool. She was one of those people where, as soon as they walk in the door, you know you can tell them anything. In fact, she's probably one of the coolest and nicest people I've ever met! She said that if I ever feel like hurting myself again, I can always call her. Thanks Heidi <333
I'm just glad it turned out better than I thought it would ^_^
My mom said I'd have to pee in a cup, get blood taken, wear a paper gown, and all that crap. But, I didn't. I got weighed, they checked my height and blood pressure, and asked me a shit load of questions.
When I was talking to Heidi, I was all.... awake and hyper. I kept smiling. And it turns out that she doesn't think I'm depressed at all. She just thinks that I have a few stresses... Okay.. she didn't say a few. I talked to her about Kristen. I kept reffering to Kristen as "my best friend" and I told her how she used to hurt herself and I'd try to help but I thought I couldn't. And that I really care and worry for Kristen. And all that.. She just simply told me that I should try talking Kristen into talking to someone and that even though I try to help, I can't always fix people's problems. Not that you have problems, hun!!! You don't!
When I was talking to Mr. Jiran and he randomly told me he was on a "fat losing thing" (in his words..) and I was like... "uh. Okay O__o;" When what I SHOULD have said and WANTED to say was that I was happy for him ^_^ Even though I really don't think he's fat. It's his choice. And I'm happy for him =3
My new Forum name at TDF is "Pickle". As you can see by my avatar. I made it. I even drew the girl in it. XD I also made Ashley a new avatar. She seemed to like it. I hope she really did like it, anyway.
And I had a weird-ass dream with me, brandi, mel', and aaron in it last night X__x;
We were walking around in the dollar store by my hosue. Then Aaron made me laugh and I snorted o__o; I NEVER snort Xx; Then we all took pictures together and stuff. Then I woke up. Um... Can you say WEIRD? Lmao!
Anyway, I gotta go soon. Plus, I'm tired.
Soooooo.. I love you Kristen, Ashley, Ben, April, Blair, Melissa, Brandi, Aaron, Angel, and Jessica!!! Good night and sweet dreams to you guys!