Wedding! That is the other thing that I am doing.
It is coming up on 100 days until the wedding. Tyler made a great point last night: we are procrastinators; we could have a two year engagement plan and we would still do everything in the last four months. It makes sense to just skip to the part with deadlines.
I am so very much in love with my boy and so very much enjoying planning our wedding. Much more than I expected. Having a project together, (a more specific project than the business of everyday life, paying bills and getting through the week and not going completely insane in the face of the modern world, which was already a collaborative effort), feeling like a team is neat. It also gives us an excuse to talk at length about what marriage means and what we expect and accept and hope for. I like those conversations, they make me feel strong and solid and sane, and also wildly silly and passionate and just loved head-to-toe. It is a good mix. I have never felt so understood with so little explanation.
People are not wrong about the unexpected level of emotion and investment that comes up in planning a wedding; there are tense moments. I like seeing how our approaches to tension work together, and how little reason there is for it in the first place. I am pleased at how well we work together, how in sync our preferences and desires are and how well we manage the things that don't just line up to start with. I think this thing will be fun, for us and other people. I think it will be exactly what we want. It is fun to pick through weird little details: pick songs and rearrange wordings and sift through bits of ritual. Amazing how revealing it can feel to share preferences and thoughts on even little things when it's all being sorted with the idea that it should reflect and represent you. I like the balance of silliness and seriousness we seem to be striking. This is for real, this is about something deep and binding, but that does not mean there shouldn’t be silly hats.
There is some element of stress, but a lot of the time it is because I feel like I should be doing more. Everything just seems to be coming together in very much the way we want, and that’s bewildering. We have a lot in place, we have plans for most of the rest. Our friends and family love and support us and seem to understand our desire to keep the whole thing fun and drama free… what gives? I thought this was supposed to be hard. Where is the part where I smash up Tokyo? We have a joint bank account now, with cards and checks and a steadily growing amount of money in it. Seriously, we don’t even really have money stress. Is this allowed?
It is kind of a silly endeavor, but I am happy. It is good to be affluent in the first world. It is good to be in love with someone who is so unequivocally good for me.
I am so very much in love with my boy and so very much enjoying planning our wedding. Much more than I expected. Having a project together, (a more specific project than the business of everyday life, paying bills and getting through the week and not going completely insane in the face of the modern world, which was already a collaborative effort), feeling like a team is neat. It also gives us an excuse to talk at length about what marriage means and what we expect and accept and hope for. I like those conversations, they make me feel strong and solid and sane, and also wildly silly and passionate and just loved head-to-toe. It is a good mix. I have never felt so understood with so little explanation.
People are not wrong about the unexpected level of emotion and investment that comes up in planning a wedding; there are tense moments. I like seeing how our approaches to tension work together, and how little reason there is for it in the first place. I am pleased at how well we work together, how in sync our preferences and desires are and how well we manage the things that don't just line up to start with. I think this thing will be fun, for us and other people. I think it will be exactly what we want. It is fun to pick through weird little details: pick songs and rearrange wordings and sift through bits of ritual. Amazing how revealing it can feel to share preferences and thoughts on even little things when it's all being sorted with the idea that it should reflect and represent you. I like the balance of silliness and seriousness we seem to be striking. This is for real, this is about something deep and binding, but that does not mean there shouldn’t be silly hats.
There is some element of stress, but a lot of the time it is because I feel like I should be doing more. Everything just seems to be coming together in very much the way we want, and that’s bewildering. We have a lot in place, we have plans for most of the rest. Our friends and family love and support us and seem to understand our desire to keep the whole thing fun and drama free… what gives? I thought this was supposed to be hard. Where is the part where I smash up Tokyo? We have a joint bank account now, with cards and checks and a steadily growing amount of money in it. Seriously, we don’t even really have money stress. Is this allowed?
It is kind of a silly endeavor, but I am happy. It is good to be affluent in the first world. It is good to be in love with someone who is so unequivocally good for me.