Whenever I finally get the guy downstairs to shut up, and I return to being my quiet self, my dog starts doing stupid things - things that inevitably make noise, more than usual. A lot more. But this is often partly due to the fact that it is hot and humid. And the floorboards consequently squeak more. And it is often hot and humid just after it rains. The guy downstairs is ALWAYS louder just before it rains, because of electricity in the air or something. And the floorboards are starting to squeak. But, after it rains, he gets tied and shuts up. So, maybe it isn't so much ME who shuts him up, but Nature. Well, during the quiet phases, there are more squeaks up here, and more dog noises. So that means that the guy downstairs starts retaliating insanely, stomping around, lashing out, acting out, like the psychopath that he is - entirely unaware that he is just a robo-puppet of the weather and cosmos. Like an ant.
I could go on and on about how, when I move one way, the universe moves another way, and pushes something against me. I have come to hypothesise that this is part of the nature of reality. We are trapped in this perpetual self-limitation, unable to see beyond the horizon of our now - our now which is a composite of pro and cons, balancing out, stringing us along in constant aggravating tonos.
It is certainly worse because3 of my CFS. I have a good day, then pay for it with two bone-crushingly terrible days, and girls still expect me to date them. And because I don't, they spew gossip in the universe, making me worthy of a hanging.
You see, all those factors mentioned above, are multi-factoral, but are also intricately interrelated. When something moves in the universe, say an electrical field, then something else moves - it rains. Maybe the guy downstairs goes nuts because of the rain, or maybe the squeaking floorboard - or my dog - associated with the rain. But the floorboards MUST squeak, for they are part of all this natural formula. Where would we be if dry things did not soak up moisture? Maybe plants would be unable to live, and so forth. And my dog must get unruly because he must contest the leadership of the alpha male, when the guy downstairs is surely now cowering - or else triumphing - because my dog is a dog. There is so much interrelation in every damn thing - so far beyond the capacity of our focused, logical, time-wise attention, or higher consciousness, that we are arrogant fools to thing we can understand any of it. And a life can flicker by in the time taken to figure out what is happening. Therefore, the regular route is this...
All things conspire, with this trying to move in here, and that trying to move over there, and this and that everywhere - that the end result is just a kind of terrarium of stasis, in which we live. We frolic around in dumbfounded awe, and more general trends wash over us this way and that. And to us, they bespeak MEANING. If we decide to suspend and believe. If not, we soon lose our intuitions, with heads focused on block-like logics, and we get hit on the head by an anvil, which certainly bespeaks a VERY powerful meaning of its own, though we don't last long enough to see it, unless we look down at our relatives all chattering over our grave.
I have had a power fatigue/ headache, and so I will be limiting my posts/sizes for a little while.
Three VERY recommended things to listen to, for upcoming posts:
-Radiolab, this week. Games - Parts 2 and 3. =
http://www.radiolab.org/story/153799-games/ -Ted Talks radio show, on TIME -
Here. it was last week. -On The Media, last week. THIRD PARTIEs. =
http://www.wnyc.org/story/on-the-media-2016-08-05/