Uncertainty
I'm having a really hard time right now (just as I have been since September) with the whole aspect of uncertainty. I hate not knowing where I'm going to be 2 weeks, a month, 3 months or 6 months from now.
In school, even though I didn't know details, I knew where I'd be living and that even if I didn't get a good summer job, I'd probably be working, that something would work out, or if it didn't, I'd be able to go back to school in September and things would go back to "normal".
I'm finding out, after having been out of school since last April, that life now is like a giant maze of uncertainty. I guess I shouldn't complain because I don't have it so bad, but I guess I just thought it would be less work and that things would kind of fall into place when in reality, they really haven't.
I think that it's great that my summer job got extended last year and I got to work for seven months longer than I'd anticipated. But now, not only do I not know if I'll have a job after next week, I don't know if I'm getting into school next year, the strike will only prolong that uncertainty, and I don't know whether or not to look for a full-time job or just something seasonal to tide me over until September (in hopes that I do get in).
I think it's also harder since I know that a lot of my friends who did feel this way are now getting acceptance letters to their various programs, or are making travel plans, or are just moving on in undergrad or in grad school or with their jobs. I know there are a lot of people who recently graduated in the same boat as me, but it's harder than I had expected and I don't do well with not knowing. It's also really hard to be proactive and try to find something when you don't know if it's worth putting in effort (and anyone who has ever had to find a job will know that it's really really hard - even to find stupid jobs which you're overqualified for or volunteer positions) to try to find something worthwhile when you might be going away in September...
It's quite frustrating...
In school, even though I didn't know details, I knew where I'd be living and that even if I didn't get a good summer job, I'd probably be working, that something would work out, or if it didn't, I'd be able to go back to school in September and things would go back to "normal".
I'm finding out, after having been out of school since last April, that life now is like a giant maze of uncertainty. I guess I shouldn't complain because I don't have it so bad, but I guess I just thought it would be less work and that things would kind of fall into place when in reality, they really haven't.
I think that it's great that my summer job got extended last year and I got to work for seven months longer than I'd anticipated. But now, not only do I not know if I'll have a job after next week, I don't know if I'm getting into school next year, the strike will only prolong that uncertainty, and I don't know whether or not to look for a full-time job or just something seasonal to tide me over until September (in hopes that I do get in).
I think it's also harder since I know that a lot of my friends who did feel this way are now getting acceptance letters to their various programs, or are making travel plans, or are just moving on in undergrad or in grad school or with their jobs. I know there are a lot of people who recently graduated in the same boat as me, but it's harder than I had expected and I don't do well with not knowing. It's also really hard to be proactive and try to find something when you don't know if it's worth putting in effort (and anyone who has ever had to find a job will know that it's really really hard - even to find stupid jobs which you're overqualified for or volunteer positions) to try to find something worthwhile when you might be going away in September...
It's quite frustrating...