just random stuff
Dearest Readers,
I have come to you in a place of change... I have had 911 surgery, an upper respitory infection, started working some again working on getting my crafting going again.... got an event or two coming up almost started seeing some one.... all in less than a months time...
Alot of change has happened. I have changed my body has changed my mentality etc has changed... I am in a odd place. I feel some sadness because of some loss in odd places that i thought would be great new beginings and some rejections where i least expected it yet made great strides in other places... in terms of work.
I often wonder why I feel so worthless so meaningless when i have expereinced rejection. Another slap in the face another reason to believe that I am worthless meaningless, ingsignfigant, unwanted un fill in the blank... I am so having a Kaite Winslet moment from the Holiday when she is discribing her feelins about Jasper to Jack Black... right now... while having a what the fuck moment
I am having these moments that conflict... however this is stimulating some great work on the crafting front because i am so worked up with emotions I am actually being productive about it....
I am just sitting with these conflicting emotions and trying to figure out what I feel it seems blundered jumbled.. Yet I have these intense moments of clairity that doesnt quit make sense looking back but yet those moments make random bits of sense of how things really are playing out in my world.... then i spend the rest of the time piecing things together....
However I think myonline work is picking up a bit...which is good... I am also figuring out this online dating thing.... I wonder what the world of lesbians think of this... sadly I will never know your thoughts... I often wonder what the reader bases is on this here blog o mine... I challenge you dear readers to let me know your thoughts on my blogs... message me reply make a comment etc let me know your thoughts because I wanna know...
Some days i feel like a bad lesbian... I forgot the flannel or i forgot the boxers... but I am also working on my labels too queer slash pan sexual fits too.... I am working through my idenity at times
I am also understanding my own hippiness and all that.....
okay enough un comprehendable ramblings.....
so comment readers
Untill next time dear readers...
I have come to you in a place of change... I have had 911 surgery, an upper respitory infection, started working some again working on getting my crafting going again.... got an event or two coming up almost started seeing some one.... all in less than a months time...
Alot of change has happened. I have changed my body has changed my mentality etc has changed... I am in a odd place. I feel some sadness because of some loss in odd places that i thought would be great new beginings and some rejections where i least expected it yet made great strides in other places... in terms of work.
I often wonder why I feel so worthless so meaningless when i have expereinced rejection. Another slap in the face another reason to believe that I am worthless meaningless, ingsignfigant, unwanted un fill in the blank... I am so having a Kaite Winslet moment from the Holiday when she is discribing her feelins about Jasper to Jack Black... right now... while having a what the fuck moment
I am having these moments that conflict... however this is stimulating some great work on the crafting front because i am so worked up with emotions I am actually being productive about it....
I am just sitting with these conflicting emotions and trying to figure out what I feel it seems blundered jumbled.. Yet I have these intense moments of clairity that doesnt quit make sense looking back but yet those moments make random bits of sense of how things really are playing out in my world.... then i spend the rest of the time piecing things together....
However I think myonline work is picking up a bit...which is good... I am also figuring out this online dating thing.... I wonder what the world of lesbians think of this... sadly I will never know your thoughts... I often wonder what the reader bases is on this here blog o mine... I challenge you dear readers to let me know your thoughts on my blogs... message me reply make a comment etc let me know your thoughts because I wanna know...
Some days i feel like a bad lesbian... I forgot the flannel or i forgot the boxers... but I am also working on my labels too queer slash pan sexual fits too.... I am working through my idenity at times
I am also understanding my own hippiness and all that.....
okay enough un comprehendable ramblings.....
so comment readers
Untill next time dear readers...