halfawake
sort of almost maybe...
so many things to blog about, in nonsense order:
FIRSTLY:
nationals are next week
i'm nowhere near prepared
i've been sidethrowing the whole of last week
my pitchbatting has been so digusting that my bat can't even touch the ball
and fielding is a lets-not-go-there
(hits the floor and whines)
WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?!
and somehow, the inspiration to be like ichiro has gone
:(
one more training on monday...give me strength
training was so shitty on thursday, so so so so so so shitty
and the thing i fear most is not that i lose the ability to play, rather the passion >_<
SECONDLY:
as much as i fear for nationals, i don't want it to end
because after that, there'll be so much less training that school's a waste of time
like the abovementioned thursday
where otherthan the useless math lecture, i had nothing else
slumdog for gc was okay but not exactly the oscarwinner i expected
the front part was just a " um okay so jamal had such a traumatising childhood. so what"
sighs
i think, sometimes i may have chosen the wrong subject combi
but the one i would maybe have liked wouldn't have gotten far
oh well, we can't have everything in life
THIRDLY:
about long socks,
why not?
just because everyone doesn't do it, doesn't mean i should not wear it too (:
as explained, high tops call for high socks
maybe a little too high, but life's too short to nitpick things like this
and about looking like a mugger with my backpack
what's wrong with looking like a mugger when i admit i am one(or at least try to be)
don't say everyone else isn't cos how else could you have gotten into nj?
as the saying "dress for the occassion" goes (okay i'm making this up XD) ,
we're going to SCHOOL so why not carry stuff for SCHOOL?
why bother strutting around in "cool" bags that simply spoil my back?
my shoulders are slanted enough for me to be unable to carry a slingbag on the left,
i don't plan on slanting it even more
plus with all the stuff i lug to school everyday (YES A LOT OF THINGS, BUT I'M KIASU LIKE THAT)
I'll become hunchback of nj in no time with anything other than a backpack
yeah so laugh and point and call me "mugger" but as long as i accept myself for who i am, i don't really give a shit what others think
i'm pretty glad i'm starting to learn how to accept myself for who i am
looking back, i was quite stupid to try to be cool and all last time, and always being so conscious of what others think of me
i still am quite conscious about that, but not so much
there's still a long way to go but yes, "the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step"
and molly told me i seemed more confident this year (maybe not), but it's really because i'm accepting myself
and it feels good (: try it sometimes
and i've taken to being more observant to things around me and it's painfully obvious that
teens are increasingly image-conscious these days
just sitting in the canteen and people watching really accounts for that
seeing people who try to act cool, do something pretty outrageous then look around to see if anyone noticed
following the latest trends blindly
not that there's anything wrong with that
but sometimes, beauty is subjective
yes, these "hot" guys and "chio" girls are always the headturners, but do you respect them?
other than" oh they are so cool i wish i could be like them", what else is there?
beauty is more than just skin-deep, it's really what's inside that counts
(and i sound so hypocritical because i like dbsk for their looks, yeah i do, but i respect their passion to keep on going. i don't think even all the money in the world can make anyone continue their hectic schedules)
a person can be really handsome or pretty, but if they have a disgusting character, i don't think we can see the beauty in them anymore
whereas some people who aren't goodlooking, but have such amazing characters, who give their lives to helping others,
those are the most beautiful people with the purest souls in the world (:
people who deserve a place in heaven with God
i admit i do like looking at good looking people (hello, i am human)
but keep in mind that, it's just eyecandy
nice to see, but maybe not so nice to know
yeah a really long winded and cliche paragraph but honestly, i believe in it
and the whole accepting myself part... that's why i keep the quote in my pencil case
a little vulgar it may seem, but i truly believe the part "fcuk what others think"
if we spend so long trying to impress others, when will we learn to love ourselves?
not that i'm insulting all the people carry "cool" bags, to each his/her own!
just that after seeing so many people try a little too hard to be like the rest,
it's really sad how some people lose their individuality, the part that attracted me to you :(
not specifically to anyone but, i think i liked you the way you were :)
so what if my bag is a little too high? i accept my fate: muggerland here i come (:
and i'm trying to stop judging people, sometimes (most of the time) i fail but i try
"if we keep judging people, we have no time to love them"
and love is what keeps us human.
HAHAHA OMG i actually sound quite moral and all
aiya, actually I'M IMMORAL ONE!
seriously, i don't think twice about killing people who deserve it
because, if you're not remorseful, life imprisonment is a waste of resources for the rest the world
when we kill you and burn your corpse, at least we'll have fertilizer for plants
so you won't really be the loser who fails at life because HEY YOU HAVE THE SAME PURPOSE AS MANURE :D
FOURTHLY:
sj's sorry sorry!
ryeowook changed his arrangement for his part in the chorus!
it sounds so love now :D
i have no idea what dbsk is doing now, their singles are arriving like bunnies
i don't even have time to appreciate and anticipate them now
avex should really consider quality over quantity
cos "survivor" pv was just a disappointment
it's no wonder "rescue" won
speaking of rescue, it's pretty addictive
however it's disappointing how jin lost his sexy us accent and hence sounds normal in the song
and i want the goobne diary for snsd!
koreans have it so good sometimes >.<
FIFTHLY:
i'm enjoying labour day <3
fridays have been such TGIFs recently this is a pleasant change
good food from mommy + time with the family = <3
LASTLY:
i love njdbskcult also beause you guys are a reality check that life isn't about chemical equations and maths sums with your diferent perspective of things
i'm lucky to have arts seniors :)
and today was a revolution again!
HOW EXCITING! :)