(no subject)

[made_you_look]

wow im mad
im mad at life
im mad at myself
no this isnt because of HIM
so dont assume
im done with dealing with that shit
my life has been fucked as of now
i need to runaway
but i cant do it
why not?
is it the fear of getting in trouble...or the thought of making my parents unhappy
i dont even know why i care anymore about them
theyve done everything they can to make me miserable
my mother has gone crazy....reading all my personal thoughts
doing everything she can to find out about my personal life then lying about going through my shit to figure out MY life
why doesnt she get it...its MY life not hers
i need time away
im sick of everything
i just wanna be alone
away from YOU
away from everyone
tears have taken me over
isnt there something wrong with random uncontrollable crys?
i havent been to therapy in so long
i need to talk to someone
anyone...someone different
someone i never talk to
someone who doesnt know me
i need the comfort of someone who cares for me....who loves me
why has everything gone wrong?
what i planned for myself is the opposite of whats happening
im emo...im depressed
i cant believe im telling u this
im not doing this for your attention
i just need to get these thoughts out of my head
i want to be put up for adoption....and they know that
they know one day theyll wake up and ill be gone...theyve talked about it
i just cant do it
im holding on to the people who r always there for me
my friends....the only people that make me happy
but wait?wasnt i just crying because of a friend.....
whats happening im so confused?
whos here....anyone
anyone for me?
cuz i cant find anyone
can this get n e worse?
or has the worst passed....