Well, it is getting close to that time again. I get asked a lot what I want for my birthday/Christmas. I usually cannot think of anything on the spot. So, I have for reference the following. First are the links
http://amzn.com/w/25GKT39HGMYB7 (General) and
http://amzn.com/w/34QEYKNK15IM3 (movies and music). At one point, the list was getting so long that the best way to "organize" was to just make two lists. Amazon really sucks when it comes to maintaining a good list of things. If the Amazon Wish List was a contestant on Hell's Kitchen, there would be plenty of "it's RAW!!" and "you stupid donkey!" being screamed. However not everything in the world that has made me happy as a gift as cost me money. I literally got a tube steak smothers in underwear. I got the infamous "Bare Knuckle", the ultimate inside joke of games related to drinking. I got a can of fish eggs, and other such oddities that at some point was well beyond the worth of the product itself. Also, I have a website. It is lonely. You can give it love. I have a Madd's World fan page on Facebook. It has two whole members :D I have a lonely forum and arcade games that would love your time. All things that can be done at no cost to you, except for your time. Gift cards, or just cards to know that you are still thinking about me. It turns out that my longest Facebook friend (was my friend on Facebook before I even was ON Facebook) at some point finally dropped me off her list. That is what happens when some people get married. They move on. Actually some people do not even have to get married to move on like that. Sometimes, people move on and that is that.
Oh, on an unrelated note, anyone who keeps an active "wish list" out there in the world, by all means, point me to it, and soon, the holidays are a comin'! :D
So it's that time when I am supposedly older, even though, I am getter older each day I do not die. Oh well. Birthday's had lost meaning to me for sometime now. It went from my 18th birthday to about my 31st. My 18th will always be magical thanks to the combined effort of the Tri-Center participants of 1992. I cannot say the class of '93 since some staff and a few others help make the day special. I remember my 21st birthday thanks to dITZ. We went to Friday's, and I ordered a Long Island Ice tea. Man that tasted like crap to me. There was a beer I got and I did not care for that either. It was some special kind that real beer drinkers drink. I drink Bud Light, enough said (and it should be noted that even at that year Bud Light was not something I was really drinking at the time. The 2006 birthday was significant due to Jen pulling out the stops to have a lot of people here. It was a reciprocation of what I did on her birthday when I invited a bunch of her droogs over for a party, and was able to get a bunch to sign a digital birthday card that I had created, and oh so sneakily was able to get to sign because I am just that good. Of course, as was most of the relationship, it was not without it's own set of drama that just set the stage for what I pretty much went through constantly. However, the effort at least made a passing grade. That reminds me, I still have a keg in my basement that requires a home (not mine).
There were a lot of issues with Jen, specific to the relationship as opposed to a person in whole, however that was one thing I know I would have missed, and most likely will this year, especially given the continued rushing thoughts of Jarin and his double home situation. While I have an awesome girlfriend, there is only so much I would expect one could do being 950 miles away, and in no way am I blaming her for anything. She has been my trump card on more than one occasion, and without her helping me out by her just being her, I am not sure where I would be right now. That is a cryptic message that only I expect to get, meaning that if I ever do come back to here with Alzheimer's or whatever, I guess I am screwed because then no one will know what that means. Needless to say, Nicole puts a smile on my face when all else seems lost to me. I love my boy, more so than any mortal thing, however when it is the thing you love most that can indirectly bring you the most pain in your life, it makes life... difficult.
While I do not remember the year, I know that there was at least one birthday after I was living in my apartment on Walnut where the first 6 minutes 24 seconds was spent with Myles and his son Brandon in my bedroom hallway as Comfortably Numb played from the start of the day. Oh dear flipping word, that reminds me that for an unknown reason I had always pegged my birthday at 12:05:46 in the morning. I attributed that to the possible reason why for all my life I have had problems going to bed early and was always up late when possible. Yeah, well, as I was looking for the historical documents for something else, I ran across my birth certificate. It turns out, I was born in the noon time. It is interesting as it would appear, at least according to Jarin's birth certificate, that they no longer print the time. I have no clue the reason I thought for so long that I was born at midnight. It is interesting that while I was off by 12 hours that I did still have the right time.
There is a possible saving grace this year. While I certainly will not hold it to anything for sure, I may possibly have a visit from my dad during my time off. I find I really cherish and miss the times I use to go out with my dad when I would visit. That brings to the other great thing about my birthday that I attempted to instill, and that was the fact my birthday always meant a few days off from work. It was one of the greater gifts I could give myself. I am not even sure how far that goes back. It is nice to know I could go out, or play games, or whatever it was I was known for doing at the time, and not have to worry about getting myself to work the next day.
So it is strange how a day that use to truly be just another day, to the point I would not realize it was coming up until about two days before, turned into an empty day. I guess that makes it something other than just another day. Of course, we have days in society where we "remember" a million some people being murdered, or the almost stop of humanity as we know it, so that is not necessarily a good thing. It does not mean that I am lost on the concept of birthdays. That is one of the things that make me strive to make birthdays so wonderful for people when possible. Jen's birthday was a great example. Jarin's birthday was another wonderful example. I totally adore watching our well behaved son, sitting there in front of a chocolate cake, wanting to just dive in yet going against the urge since he was brought up so well by two loving and great parents. So birthdays do have a meaning.
On that note, Madd Martin would like to thank everyone in advance. With over 250+ friends on FB, I know a few will take the time to drop me a line somehow, and who knows how long before I wake up :D Oh yeah, address found under info in my Facebook profile... if you are a friend!