(no subject)
I am more disappointed with life with every coming year. the older I grow, the more skeptical I become about things. when i was little, i knew exactly what i wanted. so although I didnt have all the things that I thought made life wonderful, i knew these things existed and i knew my goal in life was to get them. but growing older makes me more doubtful of everything.. like, maybe i still wont be totally satisfied if i meet this person or live in this place or lead this life. maybe its not what i imagined. and then all you're left with are doubts of how the rest of your life will be.
even last year, even when i hated school, i knew i hated it. and i knew when i heard a jack johnson song about slowing down and when i sat in the park and when i drove around with my windows down, that that was what i loved. i believed that there was something else out there and that studying was stopping me from reaching it, so though I was miserable, I wasn't hopelessly miserable.
but with every coming year, I am growing more hopelessly miserable.
to believe is beautiful. i think when you fall in love with someone, it's about a lot more than the other person. its about being sure of something, believing so much in something that you commit your life to it. and that is beautiful because believing is everything.
i want to believe in things again. i want to believe in life again. i want to believe wholeheartedly and fiercely.
people fight for things they believe in. people die for things they believe in. that's everything, man. that's what I want.
even last year, even when i hated school, i knew i hated it. and i knew when i heard a jack johnson song about slowing down and when i sat in the park and when i drove around with my windows down, that that was what i loved. i believed that there was something else out there and that studying was stopping me from reaching it, so though I was miserable, I wasn't hopelessly miserable.
but with every coming year, I am growing more hopelessly miserable.
to believe is beautiful. i think when you fall in love with someone, it's about a lot more than the other person. its about being sure of something, believing so much in something that you commit your life to it. and that is beautiful because believing is everything.
i want to believe in things again. i want to believe in life again. i want to believe wholeheartedly and fiercely.
people fight for things they believe in. people die for things they believe in. that's everything, man. that's what I want.