(no subject)

[madamx]

Well after a long 8 week battle, my papaw passed away on Saturday morning. He went very quickly and without pain. My aunt Sue and her husband were with him holding his hands as he took his last breath. Was a beautiful military funeral yesterday but it was hard to let him go. Being in the house was hard too cuz his hands have touched so many things. I went into the little bathroom and found his diabetic testing stuff and knew he wouldn't need that anymore. I slept in his bed and would just look in the closet at his shirts and stuff and just cry. It seemed so empty without him there and I found myself wanting to go to the hospital and see him like he was still there. I held his hand in the casket and I just kept thinking that if I stood there long enough he would squeeze my hand back or open his eyes. I know he is no longer suffering and is now in God's hands but I miss him so much. Christmas is gonna be one of the hardest things I'll go through this year. He was the sweetest and gentlest man I ever knew. I think God sent his spirit to me before I left there today though. I was sitting out on the back porch steps just watching the birds that he loved to feed fly around the feeders and a dove flew and lit right beside me on the step and never moved just sat there. I was afraid to move for fear of scaring it away. It sat there for a couple minutes before my brother came out the door and it flew away. Who knows how long it would have stayed, but in that few moments I felt so calm and peaceful, almost felt like he was sitting next to me. Momma is staying down there for the rest of the month to help her clean out his stuff and get ready to sell the house. That house is way too big and has too many memories for her to stay in it. She says she might get an apartment.
As far as anything else goes, nothing new.
We miss you and love you so much papaw!