Feeding 5 (Thousand) and Walking on Water
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"The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step."
We've all heard that phrase before... I suppose today I feel it is especially true. It's August 1st. I've known it was coming for a while now... but I can't help but look at my calendar and feel as though it snuck up on me when I least expected it.
With August comes change, new responsibilities and more opportunities to step out of the comfort zone and onto the waves. New adventures... and with those adventures comes that all too familiar sensation of "sea sickness"... which usually amounts to me asking over and over again, "Can I really do this? Are you sure God? What if I fail? What if I fall? What if...What if...What if..?" The list goes on and on.
But the funny thing is that I already know that everything is going to work out just fine. I already know that at the end of the year I'll be able to look back (God willing) and say "Wow... look at how far He's brought me! Look at everything God was able to accomplish!"
It's just a matter of remembering where the Call came from in the first place.
I don't think it is a coincidence that yesterday's Gospel and next Sunday's gospel readings are two of my favorites... two stories that seem to reflect my journey over the past few years: Jesus Feeds the Five Thousand and Jesus Walks on Water (Matthew 14).
The first story tells us that when we place even the smallest gifts that we have into God's hands, awesome things happen. What we may think to be insufficient, God can transform into an overwhelming sign of His love for us.
The second story reminds us of the call to step out of our comfort zones and trust Christ with everything that we are. It's about eye contact with Jesus, faith, and the knowledge that even when we feel like we're sinking, He's right there to pick us back up again.
So here we are on August 1st. Those stories still speak to us now.
We can hold back and tell God how "little" we have and that we'll never be able to do what He's called us to do and that we aren't strong enough. We can get as far away from the edge of the boat as possible and allow the "wind and waves" in our lives to intimidate and control us. We can allow fear to keep us in our comfort zones and never experience the life changing adventure that awaits us....
OR...
We could give those gifts to Christ. We can see our weak spots, our failures, the few abilities that we may have, and place them in God's hands. We can say "I'm not strong enough, but with You all things are possible," and allow God to do the unexpected with our willing hearts. We can run to the edge of the boat, accept Christ's invitation, and fix our eyes on Him as He leads us to something greater than what we would have imagined for ourselves.
Jesus never forces us to surrender our gifts or to get out of the boat. He is patient with us... even through our fears and self doubting. He is gentle and loving... and faithful. Oh so very faithful.
If there's one thing that full time ministry has taught me, it is that I can do nothing on my own... and with God I don't have to go it alone. There is no time for self doubt. Fear and worry serve no purpose on this journey... and really, there isn't time to worry about things like "Am I strong/smart enough?"
The answer to that is easy..."No, you aren't...
But God is."
St. Paul put it best... "For when I am weak, then I am strong..."
Whatever your ministry... whatever your job... whatever your gifts.. hand them over to Christ. No matter the journey... the adventure... the moment.... He's calling us out of the boat and into something more.
The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. The journey towards Eternity begins with The Cross.
This is our faith.
May you always know the gentle joy and presence of Jesus one moment, one step at a time.
be at peace
walk on water
be not afraid
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Jesus en ti confio