I was honest!
So I am sitting here. I don't really know what to do.
He asked me and I was completely honest! He asked me why I wasn't dating him. He asked me to tell him why I don't call him my boyfriend, right here and right now. I told him, what else can I do. I told him that the last time he broke up with me, I thought I was going to be able to get over him. I explained that as a result of trying to convice myself I was going to be fine without him, I pushed myself back into single mode (checking out guys, leaving the opportunities open for other horizons). I told him that even though I was setting myself up for that, I never ever really wanted anyone but him. Since I met him, he is the only one I have wanted to be with...even after all the things he has done to me. I only want to be with him! So I did what he asked I told him why, among the other reasons. I told him. I also explained that even though I put myself into single mode, I never wanted anything but him. But now that we are about to get back together, I wanted to wait until I was sure that I wouldn't hurt him. I have never wanted to hurt him. I have always hated seeing him hurt! I question whether I should have told him or not. Because instead of holding me and hugging me and kissing me, he is sitting outside my house. Clenching his fists at the thought of me!
He asked me and I was completely honest! He asked me why I wasn't dating him. He asked me to tell him why I don't call him my boyfriend, right here and right now. I told him, what else can I do. I told him that the last time he broke up with me, I thought I was going to be able to get over him. I explained that as a result of trying to convice myself I was going to be fine without him, I pushed myself back into single mode (checking out guys, leaving the opportunities open for other horizons). I told him that even though I was setting myself up for that, I never ever really wanted anyone but him. Since I met him, he is the only one I have wanted to be with...even after all the things he has done to me. I only want to be with him! So I did what he asked I told him why, among the other reasons. I told him. I also explained that even though I put myself into single mode, I never wanted anything but him. But now that we are about to get back together, I wanted to wait until I was sure that I wouldn't hurt him. I have never wanted to hurt him. I have always hated seeing him hurt! I question whether I should have told him or not. Because instead of holding me and hugging me and kissing me, he is sitting outside my house. Clenching his fists at the thought of me!