Wow, I am so sorry. I wish there was something I could say to help. Are you getting counseling? Forgive me if you have mentioned that already and I forgot, but I feel like anyone going through that much stuff could benefit. I am a big believer in it and think its worth a try even if you don't think it would help. I am also sad to see your journal go. I always hope to see one of your posts when I log on. Being a year ahead, I always felt like it was helpful to "see" the next year of vet school even though we went to drastically different schools. And when you discuss cases, I always felt like I learned something valuable. And when it came to personal stuff, your posts always seemed so insightful and I always felt I understood how you felt because you are able to articulate your feelings well. And when I was looking for feedback, I always hoped you would respond, because I always felt your advice or comments helped alot. But I do understand your reason for closing it. I have considered doing the same, and I definitely post FAR less often than I used to.
I am not currently in counseling. I can't actually figure out when and where I would fit it in, although I am a believer in that, too. Unfortunately, I have been in and out of counseling over the years, and I can't say I've ever felt as though it's done that much for me. With my last therapist I would just write everything that I was feeling, and heck, I do that whether I'm in therapy or not. ;-) Writing is the most therapeutic thing that I do! It almost just seemed like a waste of money to do what I do anyways, KWIM?
I know this sounds silly, but it just seems like everyone looks to me for some kind of strength, and I almost feel as though my entering therapy will screw with everyone else's morale. Of course, if I'm so emotionally crippled that I can no longer accomplish anything, that is obviously also a problem. I think what I am facing is that once again I need to look at some lifestyle modifications to help me cope. I go through spurts where I'm exercising routinely, and I am generally in a better mindframe when I do that. We have yoga twice a week at my work that I was regularly attending, but I've gotten out of the habit. I just need to get myself back on a schedule again, and I know I'll feel better if I do.
I didn't post all this here to complain so much as to kind of come clean, in a sense. You guys have been my on-line friends for years now, and while I've never met some of you in person, you've certainly supported me through some ups and downs in my life. I also used to really enjoy writing about cases, etc., but while I do still practice sporadically I no longer have the exposure that I did to interesting cases previously. The end result is that I post here almost exclusively to vent now, and while it's good to have an outlet for things, it doesn't feel healthy to me to continue keeping a journal solely for spurting negativity.
Are you getting counseling? Forgive me if you have mentioned that already and I forgot, but I feel like anyone going through that much stuff could benefit. I am a big believer in it and think its worth a try even if you don't think it would help.
I am also sad to see your journal go. I always hope to see one of your posts when I log on. Being a year ahead, I always felt like it was helpful to "see" the next year of vet school even though we went to drastically different schools. And when you discuss cases, I always felt like I learned something valuable. And when it came to personal stuff, your posts always seemed so insightful and I always felt I understood how you felt because you are able to articulate your feelings well. And when I was looking for feedback, I always hoped you would respond, because I always felt your advice or comments helped alot. But I do understand your reason for closing it. I have considered doing the same, and I definitely post FAR less often than I used to.
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I know this sounds silly, but it just seems like everyone looks to me for some kind of strength, and I almost feel as though my entering therapy will screw with everyone else's morale. Of course, if I'm so emotionally crippled that I can no longer accomplish anything, that is obviously also a problem. I think what I am facing is that once again I need to look at some lifestyle modifications to help me cope. I go through spurts where I'm exercising routinely, and I am generally in a better mindframe when I do that. We have yoga twice a week at my work that I was regularly attending, but I've gotten out of the habit. I just need to get myself back on a schedule again, and I know I'll feel better if I do.
I didn't post all this here to complain so much as to kind of come clean, in a sense. You guys have been my on-line friends for years now, and while I've never met some of you in person, you've certainly supported me through some ups and downs in my life. I also used to really enjoy writing about cases, etc., but while I do still practice sporadically I no longer have the exposure that I did to interesting cases previously. The end result is that I post here almost exclusively to vent now, and while it's good to have an outlet for things, it doesn't feel healthy to me to continue keeping a journal solely for spurting negativity.
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