art stuff
it's week eight of the quarter, and with evals and all, quarters at evergreen actually last 10 weeks. or rather, there are 10 weeks in which to learn. that is fucked up all by itself, but whatever.
i am STILL working on my big painting. small areas are driving me crazy. i've gotten really insightful feedback from both classmates and my advisor, which is nice. however, i cannot seem to get the background right. today, i painted it for two hours, then my advisor came in and i took my first look at it. it looked horrible...the color of the background made the colors in the body look really really wrong. so i scraped off the paint (about an entire tube worth...ugh!) and made a more orangey kinda thing happen. painted that for another two hours. stepped back to look at it. hated it too. scraped it off (another tube-sized amount of paint). wanted to cry and/or throw things. left the studio in a mood.
not getting that area right on the first try makes me feel like a failure--as if all the good things that i have accomplished with my artwork has all been luck and not talent. i know that is not rational, but it is there nonetheless. i am SO DISCOURAGED. and i REALLY need to research/write my paper this weekend. but i absolutely need to finish this painting this quarter. by the end of the ninth week, yo. i don't know how to frame what i want to write about, but my prof said that it was okay to tie in my process with research on real working artists processes. i felt like since this quarter has been ALL ABOUT ME! that it was only fitting that i say something about my own process and what i have discovered about it.
i dunno what i'm going to do with the background! it has been light in value. i think i should take it up to mid-tone and see how that looks in a coppery color which is in the figure, but not prominent. then there are so many little things i have to deal with. but i feel like i cannot move on until i get the background in.