(no subject)
Okay, now I'm getting more depressed. I just ran into a old friend from high school, and she is married and has a little boy. She seemed so happy and her son was so cute and smart for his age. And she is at least 21. And here I am, still living at home, going to school, still looking for a man, still a virgin(which I'm not ashamed of cause I'm waiting, but it puts off a lot of men), and I'm 23. It's not fair. What do I have to do? Where do I go to find a guy? I've already had two marriage proposals from two guys. One was, I hate to say it, like a door mat. He gives and gives until I just want to run in th opposite direction. The other was a friend, but I don't find him attractive in the slightest.
What is wrong with me? I mean I can't even keep friend intrested in me to stick around.
I must be defective. No one gives a shit about being with, friendly or romantically.
I want a husband. I want children. I want to live somewhere nice, and work part time. But should I lower my standards and just accept the first male that looks intrested? I don't know where to look for companionship. Where do people my age go? It's not safe to go out alone, and I'm not like most young people. I'm looking for a, I guess, older man with a stable head on his shoulders, who is maybe looking for a girl like that.
I'm getting so depressed seeing all these girls I went to school with getting and having what I have coveted all my life, while I struggle and stumble, and still fail to achieve it. I'm wondering if I shouldn't try one of those dating services, or a matchmaker. HA! like they could help me! I mean all my requirements aren't really physical, but about personality. Like being smart, faithful, trustworthy, a sense of humor, respectful, caring, adventerous, romantic, strong personality, stable in mind and a career, and comfortable in the money department. For optional things like being tall, well taller than me would be nice, strong, with dark hair, and maybe blue or green eyes, and a nice voice would be preferred.
I keep thinking I should just move. Get out of my house and this city and state and try someplace new. Just start over where I don't know anyone and just try to be myself. I want to try out my wings, but my mom says she'll help me with college, and I'm looking at Pepperdine and CLU which are private schools so they will cost a pretty penny. But I'm 23 and I want a meaningful relationship, and as of now that ain't looking likely.
I need help.
What is wrong with me? I mean I can't even keep friend intrested in me to stick around.
I must be defective. No one gives a shit about being with, friendly or romantically.
I want a husband. I want children. I want to live somewhere nice, and work part time. But should I lower my standards and just accept the first male that looks intrested? I don't know where to look for companionship. Where do people my age go? It's not safe to go out alone, and I'm not like most young people. I'm looking for a, I guess, older man with a stable head on his shoulders, who is maybe looking for a girl like that.
I'm getting so depressed seeing all these girls I went to school with getting and having what I have coveted all my life, while I struggle and stumble, and still fail to achieve it. I'm wondering if I shouldn't try one of those dating services, or a matchmaker. HA! like they could help me! I mean all my requirements aren't really physical, but about personality. Like being smart, faithful, trustworthy, a sense of humor, respectful, caring, adventerous, romantic, strong personality, stable in mind and a career, and comfortable in the money department. For optional things like being tall, well taller than me would be nice, strong, with dark hair, and maybe blue or green eyes, and a nice voice would be preferred.
I keep thinking I should just move. Get out of my house and this city and state and try someplace new. Just start over where I don't know anyone and just try to be myself. I want to try out my wings, but my mom says she'll help me with college, and I'm looking at Pepperdine and CLU which are private schools so they will cost a pretty penny. But I'm 23 and I want a meaningful relationship, and as of now that ain't looking likely.
I need help.