How can I explain you…..
This is just a short text describing how I feel at the moment about the boy I like. Damn him and his long fingers and hot chocolate-spoon licking lips :P
If you could offer me some advice on this I'd be really grateful :)
How can I explain you…..
How can I explain you that at this moment you are my world? That even without me wanting it you nestle into my heart. No matter how hard I try for the winter to freeze it or for the tall walls to hide it, you always find a path to it. With a single word you melt the ice, destroy the walls. I’m powerless and it kills me because it seems as if you don’t notice me.
You do not know that you crumble all my defences, that you conquer me completely, body and soul, and make me feel weak. It’s like I no more have control over my actions. But I cannot explain you. I’m afraid you won’t listen, that it will all seems funny, childish to you. That in the end my hard will once again be on the floor broken into a thousand pieces which are a part of the puzzle I’m arranging over and over all my life.
I would be the happiest person in the world if you would just hug me. Even if kisses and touches never happen, your friendship would make me happy. That hug would be the whole world for me. And nothing else would matter, only you.
Love, I’m dying for you. Every time I see another girl in your arms I’m flooded by jealousy. I know it’s not at all rational. You’re not mine. But I feel like they’re cheating you and mocking me. At the same time I’m afraid that you’re doing it because you want to and that when you’re far away from my look, the lustful looks I give you are the subject of your mocking.
Maybe the risk is worth it. Maybe it’s worth it to show you in some way that you mean something to me. Maybe in the end we’ll be together. But I’m afraid. This heart has felt that kind of pain too many times and it doesn’t want to again. Not like it doesn’t hurt now. Your inattention hurts, it hurts that I love you, everything hurts! And it just hurts!
I just want you to understand….
