Fic: I Told You it was a Bad Plan FRT
Title: I Told You it was a Bad Plan
Authors: Kathie, Dee, & Ginny (MOT)
Fandom: CSI:NY
Disclaimer: Not ours. We're just borrowing them for an experiment
Trio: Mac/Danny/Don (Macadamia)
100Moods Prompt 020: Crazy
Rating: FRT
Summary: They made cookies. They destroyed Mac's kitchen. It was all Don's fault.
Authors Notes: Let the nuttiness commence! This is Evelyn's fault.
"Messer!" Don snapped and tried to get comfortable. "Stop kicking me!"
Danny grunted and twisted a bit around, wrapping the blanket they were sharing more tightly around himself. "I didn't start it!"
"It's not my fault he walked in on us!" Don answered hotly and kicked Danny.
"You didn't stop!" Danny said in irritation. "Yeah, neither were you!"
They fell silent for a moment, and then Danny sighed heavily. "But it's not fair that we have to sleep on the couch!" he pouted.
"He's being unreasonable," Don griped.
"Very," Danny pouted. "We didn't do that much damage."
"And it wasn't our fault!" Don added. "Besides, we're two, and he is one. Why isn't he sleeping on the couch?"
Danny shrugged. "It's his apartment. Besides, he's a marine."
"It's still not fair." Don was silent for a moment before snorting. "We should wait until he sleeps and then carry him out of his bed and on the couch."
"We'd never get away with it," Danny pointed out.
"Yes we will. Come on Messer," Don urged.
"Do I look crazy? He'll give me the next five dumpster diving details!"
"I'll make it up to you," Don offered.
"What if he wakes up? What if he doesn't recognize it's us? What if he accidentally snaps our necks? It's Mac we're talking about here!"
"He's not going to snap our necks."
"He might."
"Come on, it's Mac. He won't do that. He never suffocated you in your sleep, either, did he?"
"Not yet."
"Don't be so pessimistic."
"Fine. But if he kills us, you're sleeping on the floor."
"Trust me, he's not going to kill us." Don snorted and poked Danny in the ribs. "And if he does, he'll regret it and never again make us sleep on the couch."
"Because we'll be dead."
"We won't."
"Right. I'm making you go in the first dumpster."
"Have a cookie, it'll make you feel better," Don offered one of the cookies that had caused their trouble.
"I'm making you go. Head first," Danny threatened.
"Remind me to borrow one of your shirts," Don retorted. "Besides, he's not going to kill us."
"As long as I get to pick your tie," Danny agreed.
"I like my ties."
"They're ugly."
"They are not ugly." Don said sharply and kicked Danny again.
Danny glared at Don as he took another cookie. "Yeah, they are. Won't matter anyway, Mac's still going to kill us for this."
Don chewed, swallowed, and took the next cookie. "Not if he's asleep. He wouldn't even notice us carrying him out here and taking over his bed."
"This is crazy."
"Listen to him snore. He's not going to wake up. Come on, let's do this."
"Will you give my eulogy when Mac kills me?" Danny asked as he slowly stood from the couch and faced the bedroom.
"No," Don said honestly and climbed to his feet, eating another cookie. "Because I'll be right behind you."
"Maybe Stella will say something nice."
"Lindsay will probably compliment your ass."
"But I don't want Sid to do my autopsy."
"Shel then?"
"He's not a ME anymore."
"But if we put it in our wills?"
"You can't put something like that in your will."
"Fine. Marty then."
"Marty is working nightshift. If he did the autopsy, Mac couldn't investigate our deaths."
"He can' t investigate our deaths. It's a conflict of interest."
"You're right. And if he kills us, he is going to go to prison." Don frowned. "But then, it's Mac. He'll never get caught." He swallowed and stopped suddenly. "They're never going to find our bodies," he whispered softly.
"This was your idea!" Danny hissed, pushing him.
"So? I changed my mind!" Don hissed back.
"You can't change you mind now!"
"Yes I can!"
"Fine." Danny said as he squared his shoulders. "I'll do it. Besides, you're too pretty to hurt." Danny started towards the room.
A hand on his shoulder stopped him. "What did you just say?" Don hissed.
"You're too pretty. Besides, Mac wouldn't kill you. You'd just look at him with those bright blue eyes and get out of anything."
"Are you drunk?" Don asked and looked carefully at Danny. "Or did you hit your head?"
Danny pushed Don in front of him. "Come on. Let's get this over with."
Don hesitated. "The couch isn't that bad," he said slowly. "And if you could keep your feet at your side..."
"This was your idea." Danny reminded him.
"It was a bad idea."
"Wanna just call in tomorrow? Do it while he's at work?"
"How are we going to make him sleep on the couch if he's at work?"
"Can we mix something in his oatmeal?"
"Or his coffee?"
"Or you could both go to sleep," a voice called from the bedroom.
"I told you!" Danny hissed as he poked Don again. "He's awake."
Danny and Don looked at each other. "Are you letting us back in there?" Danny asked carefully.
"No," Mac cheerfully informed them.
"This is your fault!"
"Me?! It's your fault."
"How are we supposed to sleep then?"
"But Mac..." - "I told you under which circumstances I let you back in this bed," Mac said.
"What if we--?"
"No!"
"But you haven't ---"
"I said no."
"Please?"
"You know the conditions." Mac informed them through the closed door. "Good night. Try not to make too much noise."
"Not fair," Danny grumbled.
Don sighed. "He's right, you know? It was our own fault."
"It's still not fair."
Don chuckled. "And the sprinkles look so good on the ceiling of Mac's kitchen."
"You're the one that got the frosting on the bedroom carpet."
"But it looked good there! Mac needs more color in his life."
"He didn't think so."
"Besides, you were distracting me."
Danny kicked at the carpet. "Besides, he's a mean, boring..." The bedroom door was suddenly opened.
"And wonderful," he finished quickly.
"Amazing even," Don quicky added.
"You're too loud."
Both men looked down. "Mac, we're sorry." Don finally offered.
"Sorry," Danny agreed.
"And?"
"And it won't happen again."
"And?"
"We love you?" Danny offered.
"And?"
"Do you want a cookie?"
Mac only frowned. "And?" he repeated darkly.
"And we won't do it again?"
"You already said that," Mac pointed out. "And?"
Danny sighed heavily. "And we will clean the kitchen up, and remove the cookie dough from the ceiling, and put everything back where we found it. And Don is going to get your favourite cup from the top shelf where you and I can't reach it without help?"
"Okay," Mac said and walked into the bedroom.
"Okay?" Don repeated. "Does that mean we can sleep in the bed now?"
Mac smiled sweetly. "No."
"We should have made him sleep on the couch when he had the chance," Don muttered.
Danny stared at him. "You chickened out!"
"You did it first!" Don answered hotly.
"This is your fault!" they accused at the same time.
"Both of you, on the couch! Now!" Mac yelled from the dark room.
Danny walked to the door, grabbing his keys. "I'm going home," he announced.
"Can I come with you?" Don asked.
Danny hesitated for a split second, but it was already too long.
"Fine. I'll just go home." Don grumbled as he grabbed his jacket and brushed past Danny.
"Don! Wait!" Danny called out, but Don didn't stop or slow down.
"What?" He called out, not stopping.
"Wait for me?" Danny offered.
"Only if you go back in and get the cookies."
A slow grin formed on Danny's face. "Deal. My place or yours?"
Don thought for a moment. "Yours. Bigger bed," he finally decided.
"Yeah and I've got the better camera." Danny commented. He choose to ignore Don's confused look as they closed the door behind them.
"Cookies," Don reminded him.
Danny nodded and reentered the apartment, sneaking into the kitchen to grab the plate of cookies.
Suddenly he was pressed against the wall by a warm muscular weight, and a hand was put over his mouth to keep him quiet.
"Danny?" Don called out as he re-entered the apartment.
"Danny?" he called again when he didn't get an answer.
Don walked further into the apartment determined to find Danny.
"Danny?" He called a third time before turning around and seeing Danny pinned against the wall. Held there by Mac.
"Hi Mac," he said, swallowing nervously. "We thought you were asleep."
"I was," Mac said and leaned against Danny. "Someone woke me up."
"You were already in the kitchen when I walked in," Danny pointed out.
"We'll leave," Don offered.
"That's not a kitchen, that's a warzone, thanks to you two," Mac said dryly.
"We said we'd clean it."
"We said we were sorry. What else can we do Mac?"
"Not leave."
Both turned puppy-dog-eyes towards him.
"Do we still have to stay on the couch?"
"We just want to sleep on a bed," Danny said, his back pressing into the light switch.
Mac pressed him a bit more against the wall, and the apartment suddenly disappeared in darkness again. For a moment they were silent, then Danny said: "Oops?" and started to laugh.
"Seriously, Mac, we're sorry, and it's not going to happen again," Don finally said.
"Yeah, we were just trying to surprise you," Danny offered.
"Clean up in the morning?"
Mac sighed. "It's okay," he said. "You clean up that mess and we're fine."
"And we can sleep in the bed?" Don asked hopefully.
"All right," he gave in. "You can sleep in the bed."
Danny pushed against the light switch again, blinding them all when the lights came back on. He smiled at Mac. "Love you," he said and leaned forwards to kiss Mac.
"Yeah, me too," Don added.
Mac shook his head. "You are crazy," he said. "And you promised me a cookie!"
Danny grabbed the left over frosting and pushed Don towards the bedroom. "I hope you've got old sheets on the bed, Mac. And want a Don flavored cookie."
The End.
Authors: Kathie, Dee, & Ginny (MOT)
Fandom: CSI:NY
Disclaimer: Not ours. We're just borrowing them for an experiment
Trio: Mac/Danny/Don (Macadamia)
100Moods Prompt 020: Crazy
Rating: FRT
Summary: They made cookies. They destroyed Mac's kitchen. It was all Don's fault.
Authors Notes: Let the nuttiness commence! This is Evelyn's fault.
"Messer!" Don snapped and tried to get comfortable. "Stop kicking me!"
Danny grunted and twisted a bit around, wrapping the blanket they were sharing more tightly around himself. "I didn't start it!"
"It's not my fault he walked in on us!" Don answered hotly and kicked Danny.
"You didn't stop!" Danny said in irritation. "Yeah, neither were you!"
They fell silent for a moment, and then Danny sighed heavily. "But it's not fair that we have to sleep on the couch!" he pouted.
"He's being unreasonable," Don griped.
"Very," Danny pouted. "We didn't do that much damage."
"And it wasn't our fault!" Don added. "Besides, we're two, and he is one. Why isn't he sleeping on the couch?"
Danny shrugged. "It's his apartment. Besides, he's a marine."
"It's still not fair." Don was silent for a moment before snorting. "We should wait until he sleeps and then carry him out of his bed and on the couch."
"We'd never get away with it," Danny pointed out.
"Yes we will. Come on Messer," Don urged.
"Do I look crazy? He'll give me the next five dumpster diving details!"
"I'll make it up to you," Don offered.
"What if he wakes up? What if he doesn't recognize it's us? What if he accidentally snaps our necks? It's Mac we're talking about here!"
"He's not going to snap our necks."
"He might."
"Come on, it's Mac. He won't do that. He never suffocated you in your sleep, either, did he?"
"Not yet."
"Don't be so pessimistic."
"Fine. But if he kills us, you're sleeping on the floor."
"Trust me, he's not going to kill us." Don snorted and poked Danny in the ribs. "And if he does, he'll regret it and never again make us sleep on the couch."
"Because we'll be dead."
"We won't."
"Right. I'm making you go in the first dumpster."
"Have a cookie, it'll make you feel better," Don offered one of the cookies that had caused their trouble.
"I'm making you go. Head first," Danny threatened.
"Remind me to borrow one of your shirts," Don retorted. "Besides, he's not going to kill us."
"As long as I get to pick your tie," Danny agreed.
"I like my ties."
"They're ugly."
"They are not ugly." Don said sharply and kicked Danny again.
Danny glared at Don as he took another cookie. "Yeah, they are. Won't matter anyway, Mac's still going to kill us for this."
Don chewed, swallowed, and took the next cookie. "Not if he's asleep. He wouldn't even notice us carrying him out here and taking over his bed."
"This is crazy."
"Listen to him snore. He's not going to wake up. Come on, let's do this."
"Will you give my eulogy when Mac kills me?" Danny asked as he slowly stood from the couch and faced the bedroom.
"No," Don said honestly and climbed to his feet, eating another cookie. "Because I'll be right behind you."
"Maybe Stella will say something nice."
"Lindsay will probably compliment your ass."
"But I don't want Sid to do my autopsy."
"Shel then?"
"He's not a ME anymore."
"But if we put it in our wills?"
"You can't put something like that in your will."
"Fine. Marty then."
"Marty is working nightshift. If he did the autopsy, Mac couldn't investigate our deaths."
"He can' t investigate our deaths. It's a conflict of interest."
"You're right. And if he kills us, he is going to go to prison." Don frowned. "But then, it's Mac. He'll never get caught." He swallowed and stopped suddenly. "They're never going to find our bodies," he whispered softly.
"This was your idea!" Danny hissed, pushing him.
"So? I changed my mind!" Don hissed back.
"You can't change you mind now!"
"Yes I can!"
"Fine." Danny said as he squared his shoulders. "I'll do it. Besides, you're too pretty to hurt." Danny started towards the room.
A hand on his shoulder stopped him. "What did you just say?" Don hissed.
"You're too pretty. Besides, Mac wouldn't kill you. You'd just look at him with those bright blue eyes and get out of anything."
"Are you drunk?" Don asked and looked carefully at Danny. "Or did you hit your head?"
Danny pushed Don in front of him. "Come on. Let's get this over with."
Don hesitated. "The couch isn't that bad," he said slowly. "And if you could keep your feet at your side..."
"This was your idea." Danny reminded him.
"It was a bad idea."
"Wanna just call in tomorrow? Do it while he's at work?"
"How are we going to make him sleep on the couch if he's at work?"
"Can we mix something in his oatmeal?"
"Or his coffee?"
"Or you could both go to sleep," a voice called from the bedroom.
"I told you!" Danny hissed as he poked Don again. "He's awake."
Danny and Don looked at each other. "Are you letting us back in there?" Danny asked carefully.
"No," Mac cheerfully informed them.
"This is your fault!"
"Me?! It's your fault."
"How are we supposed to sleep then?"
"But Mac..." - "I told you under which circumstances I let you back in this bed," Mac said.
"What if we--?"
"No!"
"But you haven't ---"
"I said no."
"Please?"
"You know the conditions." Mac informed them through the closed door. "Good night. Try not to make too much noise."
"Not fair," Danny grumbled.
Don sighed. "He's right, you know? It was our own fault."
"It's still not fair."
Don chuckled. "And the sprinkles look so good on the ceiling of Mac's kitchen."
"You're the one that got the frosting on the bedroom carpet."
"But it looked good there! Mac needs more color in his life."
"He didn't think so."
"Besides, you were distracting me."
Danny kicked at the carpet. "Besides, he's a mean, boring..." The bedroom door was suddenly opened.
"And wonderful," he finished quickly.
"Amazing even," Don quicky added.
"You're too loud."
Both men looked down. "Mac, we're sorry." Don finally offered.
"Sorry," Danny agreed.
"And?"
"And it won't happen again."
"And?"
"We love you?" Danny offered.
"And?"
"Do you want a cookie?"
Mac only frowned. "And?" he repeated darkly.
"And we won't do it again?"
"You already said that," Mac pointed out. "And?"
Danny sighed heavily. "And we will clean the kitchen up, and remove the cookie dough from the ceiling, and put everything back where we found it. And Don is going to get your favourite cup from the top shelf where you and I can't reach it without help?"
"Okay," Mac said and walked into the bedroom.
"Okay?" Don repeated. "Does that mean we can sleep in the bed now?"
Mac smiled sweetly. "No."
"We should have made him sleep on the couch when he had the chance," Don muttered.
Danny stared at him. "You chickened out!"
"You did it first!" Don answered hotly.
"This is your fault!" they accused at the same time.
"Both of you, on the couch! Now!" Mac yelled from the dark room.
Danny walked to the door, grabbing his keys. "I'm going home," he announced.
"Can I come with you?" Don asked.
Danny hesitated for a split second, but it was already too long.
"Fine. I'll just go home." Don grumbled as he grabbed his jacket and brushed past Danny.
"Don! Wait!" Danny called out, but Don didn't stop or slow down.
"What?" He called out, not stopping.
"Wait for me?" Danny offered.
"Only if you go back in and get the cookies."
A slow grin formed on Danny's face. "Deal. My place or yours?"
Don thought for a moment. "Yours. Bigger bed," he finally decided.
"Yeah and I've got the better camera." Danny commented. He choose to ignore Don's confused look as they closed the door behind them.
"Cookies," Don reminded him.
Danny nodded and reentered the apartment, sneaking into the kitchen to grab the plate of cookies.
Suddenly he was pressed against the wall by a warm muscular weight, and a hand was put over his mouth to keep him quiet.
"Danny?" Don called out as he re-entered the apartment.
"Danny?" he called again when he didn't get an answer.
Don walked further into the apartment determined to find Danny.
"Danny?" He called a third time before turning around and seeing Danny pinned against the wall. Held there by Mac.
"Hi Mac," he said, swallowing nervously. "We thought you were asleep."
"I was," Mac said and leaned against Danny. "Someone woke me up."
"You were already in the kitchen when I walked in," Danny pointed out.
"We'll leave," Don offered.
"That's not a kitchen, that's a warzone, thanks to you two," Mac said dryly.
"We said we'd clean it."
"We said we were sorry. What else can we do Mac?"
"Not leave."
Both turned puppy-dog-eyes towards him.
"Do we still have to stay on the couch?"
"We just want to sleep on a bed," Danny said, his back pressing into the light switch.
Mac pressed him a bit more against the wall, and the apartment suddenly disappeared in darkness again. For a moment they were silent, then Danny said: "Oops?" and started to laugh.
"Seriously, Mac, we're sorry, and it's not going to happen again," Don finally said.
"Yeah, we were just trying to surprise you," Danny offered.
"Clean up in the morning?"
Mac sighed. "It's okay," he said. "You clean up that mess and we're fine."
"And we can sleep in the bed?" Don asked hopefully.
"All right," he gave in. "You can sleep in the bed."
Danny pushed against the light switch again, blinding them all when the lights came back on. He smiled at Mac. "Love you," he said and leaned forwards to kiss Mac.
"Yeah, me too," Don added.
Mac shook his head. "You are crazy," he said. "And you promised me a cookie!"
Danny grabbed the left over frosting and pushed Don towards the bedroom. "I hope you've got old sheets on the bed, Mac. And want a Don flavored cookie."
The End.