(no subject)
Hello, friendly neighborhood cellular sales lady here.
So, I'm usually extremely nice to customers, but a few days ago, I decided "No more taking shit off of customers. I'm done with it."
There's this guy that comes into the store to buy minutes for his prepaid phone.
Here, we keep the card that you buy for our records and put the minutes on ourselves. Most people appreciate this service, as it saves them a phone call. One day, he gets this bright idea in his head that he is going to put the minutes on by himself. He is hereinafter referred to as "Idiot."
Me: "Ok sir, what is your phone number now?"
Idiot: "I'll put them on."
Me: "I'm sorry, sir. We have to keep the card for our records, so I'll be taking care of this for you. Now, may I have your phone number?"
Idiot: "I'll put them on."
Me: "Maybe you didn't understand me. I'll be keeping the card."
Idiot: "I CAN DO IT MYSELF!"
Me: "You are welcome to buy your minutes somewhere else if this is a problem."
My fuse is only so m*f*cking long.
So he comes back in. He's lost his charger. Can we just give him a new one? Oh yeah, sure, right. Moron.
So he buys one. He calls back the next day.
Idiot: "Uh, yeah, I bought a charger last night.....(goes into lengthy explanation about what his phone is doing and how it's not charging, etc.)
Me: (goes into lengthy explanation about how he can bring the charger back in, along with his phone....we'll decide whether it's his phone or the charger, then go from there....)
Idiot: repeats what he just said.
Then I repeat what I said...then he repeats what he said...etc,etc,etc.
I have, at this point, decided that he's thinking to himself...
"Hey, if I repeat myself over and over, maybe her answer will be different next time."
Idiot: "Well, let me talk to a manager."
Me: "I AM the manager."
Silence. Birds chirping. Crickets. Pin drops............................................
Me: "Sir, it sounds like the problem is with your battery, but it's impossible for me to tell over the phone.....etc."
Idiot: "How much is a battery?"
Me: "It will be about thirty dollars."
Idiot: "I don't have thirty dollars."
Me: (OMGWTF ARE YOU KIDDING?) "As it turns out, either do I. Is there anything else I can do for you today?"
*Click*
Note: If you hang up on me, that is it. Do not come back up to the store. I do have the right to refuse service to anyone, and hanging up on me just put you at the very top of my shit list. Congratulations.
Today he brings the charger to the store. No box. No receipt. Nothing.
I try every other charger we have on the wall for his phone....Nothing.
Um.Yeah. It's not the charger.
Me: "It seems like your phone is malfunctioning. Maybe in the slot where you plug the charger in because the chargers are not registering at all with your phone."
Idiot: "Can I just get a new charger?"
Me: "Since there's nothing wrong with this one.....No."
Idiot: "Well, the other guy that works here said...."
Me: *raises eyebrow*.............
Idiot: *scream* "WELL JUST CHARGE MY PHONE!" *scream*
Me: (Oh NO He Did NOT Just Go There...!!??) "Have a nice day, sir."
Idiot: "You gonna charge my phone?!?!?!?"
Me: "Leave. Now. Go."
Idiot: "I'm going to find your boss!"
Me: "Yeah, well, tell him that you yelled at me, will ya? Now LEAVE!!!!!" OMGDIEFUCKINGDIECRACKHEAD!!
And by the way, I have face plates. I have cases. They are not the same thing.
If you ask for a case for your phone, do not scream and bitch and moan when I come back with a case instead of a face plate.
---me
PS: I am not a Sprint store. I work at one. I, personally, am not one. So stop asking me if I'm a Sprint store. No, I'm not.