country music and driving in the sun..

[ma_ev_e]

i want something that will just stay in my life.

i hate changes. some can be good. but i like my habits and what i'm used to. i like knowing that someone will always be there for me. today just freaked me out. my dad is the one person i can always depend on to be there and talk to me and calm me down. throughout everything with Brian he was always there and it was scary to think about that one day he wont be. i'm glad he got over his fear of the doctors and went today because everything was pretty early they said. thank god. i know there are so many other people for me to talk to. it's just that i feel like certain people i just have awesome connections with and i cant imagine being myself without them. this probably sounds so weird since its my dad, but i feel like both my parents are also my bestfriends, i talk to them about everything.

the thought of having no one to talk to that i have a connection with is so scary to me. ever since Brian my dad and little sister have definately taken that part in my life. and even then its not completely the same, but i'm thankful to have them.

life is so weird.

i miss having someone that i can tell everything to.